Social Question

Mmmmbop's avatar

Why is one woman never enough?

Asked by Mmmmbop (28points) May 1st, 2012

I’ve been in great relationships, but I’ll still want another woman simply because they’re different.

Observing members: 0 Composing members: 0

43 Answers

Bill1939's avatar

How old are you?

WestRiverrat's avatar

I never had that problem.

flutherother's avatar

Mmmmm it may depend on the woman.

Jeruba's avatar

False premise.

Skaggfacemutt's avatar

My husband used to say that one was expensive enough!

chyna's avatar

Sounds like immaturity to me.

Salem88's avatar

@Jeruba – I truly hope they get you’re Perfect answer. 100 points if I could give them. @Mmmmbop – Someday you’ll be sooo in love with a woman, she’ll be all you can think about and can’t live without as the years roll by. Just keep an open heart. You haven’t met The One.

thorninmud's avatar

Do you constantly seek novelty in other domains as well? See Neophilia, a personality trait.

Pied_Pfeffer's avatar

What about looking for a compatible partner that is fine with an open relationship? One question though…would you be okay if this partner wanted to be with other people besides you?

Mmmmbop's avatar

I’ve asked women for open relationships and they don’t want to.

I’m not sure what you mean by false premise?

nikipedia's avatar

Some people don’t value exclusivity. Nothing wrong with that.

You answered your own question, though. You get different things from different intimate relationships, so you prefer to have more than one.

Was there something else you wanted to discuss about it?

SuperMouse's avatar

I can’t help but wonder if maybe the relationships aren’t as great as you think.

flutherother's avatar

Sometimes one woman is too much.

WestRiverrat's avatar

Maybe you should take a trip to Munich. She might change your mind

Mmmmbop's avatar

I would like to fall in love someday, but what if I keep doing this? Maybe I shouldn’t worry about it until later in life?

Trillian's avatar

Whatever. If I could dredge up the sincerity, I’d say I was curious to know how satisfying the others in your relationships felt that you were, but alas, I can’t.
If you are capable, consider this; dabbling ones toes in the shallow end is rarely as satisfying as a headfirst dive into the deep end, but taking such a dive requires something like fortitude and commitment.
Enjoy life in the kiddie pool.

Salem88's avatar

@Mmmmbop – Wait a few moments please, while I call Jeruba…

@Jeruba – YooHoo, emmmm, whistling, or shall I?

Jeruba's avatar

What I mean by “false premise” is that the assumption behind your question is false. Your question “Why is one woman never enough?” says “One woman is never enough. Why?” It is not true that one woman is never enough. It’s false. So there’s really no way to answer the question.

I agree with others that you simply sound young and immature. But that could be my bias. Some people do sustain that insatiable appetite for variety all their lives. I, for one, would avoid a relationship with them because I’d find it shallow and unsatisfying.

nikipedia's avatar

You guys are being really harsh. I think it’s clear that this person is talking about his own experiences, and isn’t saying, “Men everywhere feel that one woman isn’t enough!”

Feeling unfulfilled by relationships, or unfulfilled by monogamous relationships, is hardly a reason to be chastised.

Mmmmbop's avatar

I don’t have a problem with a woman becoming bored with me. The relationships start out good, but they just get boring and I’m wondering why that always happens.

janbb's avatar

Enough for what?

marinelife's avatar

@Mmmmbop Probably always happens because you and your partner lack true intimacy, which is required for a sustained relationship.

ucme's avatar

Twas very foggy out today, i’ve never seen a bigamist….

lloydbird's avatar

@Mmmmbop Ask any bull, stag, silver- back gorilla, alpha chimp, ram, or basic male mammal. The wanting seems to be hardwired. The acting upon is a choice for us.

Mmmmbop's avatar

I agree. Thank you everyone.

Salem88's avatar

@lloydbird – maybe no one’s ever told him that??? Was he home-schooled?

Salem88's avatar

@Mmmmbop – Thanks for visiting. Hope we were helpful till you got what you wanted.

rooeytoo's avatar

The standard answer is that it is the male biological imperative to spread one’s seed. And it is the female’s to find the richest, strongest, smartest, best looking sperm donor for her offspring.

Do you fill those shoes? If you don’t the women will soon tire of you as well and you can both part with no feelings of remorse.

Ron_C's avatar

Yeah I remember being young and wanting all the women I saw. Believe me; after 40 some years of marriage one woman is more than enough. You get over temporary lust, real love lasts a life time.

augustlan's avatar

Some people are just not cut out for monogamy, and that’s ok… as long as you find a partner (or multiple partners) who feels the same way. It is possible, of course, that you just haven’t met a woman you love. That’s ok, too. There’s not necessarily anything wrong with you, but if you’re unhappy with the situation, you might want to talk to a counselor about it.

ragingloli's avatar

Male human apes are driven by instinct to spread their seed among as many females as possible, to maximise the amount of offspring.

mazingerz88's avatar

Because there are so many of them out there who are just so beautiful and desirable and if you are a man who women find beautiful and desirable as well…good for you.

ninjacolin's avatar

There are no rules except the ones our society suggests to us from birth on. You don’t have to have just one, really. But you could if you’re interested. You could make it a matter of dedication to a lady you really care for that you’ll never be with anyone else. Doesn’t mean you won’t feel urges. Even celibate priests feel urges. They just remember their promise and divert their attention. Sometimes it works for some priests and sometimes it doesn’t. You’re no different:

You could try to dedicate yourself to one and with loving effort, succeed at dying without ever being with another woman. It would take discipline though. And you certainly wouldn’t want to do that for just any woman. She would have to be pretty fuckin’ worth it..

But so far it seems like you just haven’t come across a lady who you feel would both appreciate and deserve that amount of discipline at the same time.

rooeytoo's avatar

The point that no one has yet made is that no birth control method is 100% effective. So everytime you spread your seed, not that there is anything wrong with that, you are taking the chance that a child will result.

So I would suggest to you that you consider that possibility before you unzip your trousers. Perhaps you should ask yourself the questions, would I want this woman to be the mother of my child, do I want a child, would this woman have an abortion, are she and I on the same page regarding abortion, do I want to offer financial support for a child, do I want to have an active role in the rearing of a child.

It could be said that it is old fashioned to think that having sex with every woman you can is not an admirable thing to do, but I think it is simply responsible adult behavior.

syz's avatar

If I was being mean, I’d say “Because you’re one of those men”.

wundayatta's avatar

The false premise idea is that you are blaming women for what is your issue. One woman can be enough. Indeed, for many men, there is one woman who is enough to last them a life time.

To answer your question, you have to look inside yourself. Some of the women here suggest it is an issue of maturity. I think there’s no way they can know that. It’s a knee-jerk reaction on their part, although I will readily admit that there are plenty of men that women consider immature out there.

But if you want to have one woman, and you find yourself unable to do it, don’t blame the women. Rather, ask yourself what you are looking for, and why you have been unable to create it.

Reltationships are not jewels unearthed in a mine. They are made by human kind. You must put all your effort into making a good relationship that lasts. If it does not last, that is not your partner’s fault. It is yours. But blame is not really the issue. The issue is making a relationship is something you do, not something that falls in your lap.

mrrich724's avatar

Animals are not wired to be with only one mate (at least sexually speaking). Sometimes humans forget that we are still animals, and that we still have certain animal instincts (like the sexual urge you speak of, fight or flight, and some others).

It’s natural, but since you live in a society that has pretty much invented the ideology that it’s NOT natural, or ok, you should use courtesy to seek like-minded individuals, or be clear up front what your intentions are, b/c you wouldn’t want to hurt someone!

Dr_Lawrence's avatar

Most mature adults set aside the endless search for additional sexual partners to bolster their self-esteem.

There are some mature adults who freely enjoy sex and other types of intimacy with more than one partner. You might get a response from such a Jelly.

I have avoided being judgmental about you and your question. I suggest you explore why you hold the belief you stated in your question.

Trillian's avatar

Lots of animals mate for life. Just sayin’.

SuperMouse's avatar

Do you think your eye strays and mind starts to wander when you feel like the “newness” of a relationship is wearing off? Rather than t talking about wanting to have serious relationships with several different women, are you wondering why you don’t have a desire to stay in a relationship longer? Because if that is the situation, when you do fine the one the newness wearing off won’t be an issue. It will go away of course, but it will be replaced by something deeper and more meaningful. In the meantime date, enjoy yourself, and trust that you’ll know when the right one arrives.

Sunny2's avatar

You can play around all you want to, for as long as you want to. It’s your life. When you’re sixty and alone, you might change your mind, or you may be happy by yourself. You never know. Or you may find yourself so smitten with the right woman, you won’t recognize yourself. I hope she recognizes you.

Simone_De_Beauvoir's avatar

I don’t know, maybe you have specific expectations that relationships don’t meet for you. You have to figure it out within you, not the women.

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