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emjay's avatar

Could this dream I had mean something more?

Asked by emjay (681points) May 7th, 2012

I’ve been seeing this guy for about 6 months.
I really like him, in fact, I’m about ready to tell him I love him.
That’s a huge thing for me. I’m kind of damaged.
About a year ago (some of you might remember) My dad died, and my boyfriend and I broke up, my car bit the dust, and I moved out of my parents house, all within the space of about two weeks. I have a fear of things I love disappearing when I need them most, and I have a really hard time letting people into my life because of it.
This guy is also pretty damaged. His ex-fiance had been cheating on him the ENTIRE four years they were together.
So we both have a lot of emotional/relationship issues. And I feel like we’re both stronger together because of them, strangely.

Anyway. Last night I had this dream that this guy I’ve been seeing was at my house. He was getting ready to leave and as he closed the door behind him he yelled at me “I love you!” and then slammed the door angrily and left.
In my dream (and in real life) I was really confused. He’s never said that to me before. We hadn’t been fighting, so his apparent anger was really strange.

Does anyone know anything about dreams and their meanings? Does this say something about our relationship? I’m just really confused by it…
I know sometimes you shouldn’t read too much into your dreams. but it just seemed so real!

If anyone can give me any insight, that would be awesome. Also, let me know if more info would be helpful.

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8 Answers

john65pennington's avatar

I think your dream is what you are anticipating from your bf, but are not receiving it.

I am just thinking for what reason he has not told you, I love you? Could it be that maybe he does not love you? Sorry to throw in monkey wrench into your dream, but this could be another meaning of your dream. Slamming the door may mean that he said those three words to you, but they hurt him to have to say them.

After three months of dating, I told my wife I loved her at least once or twice a day. You just know what you know, understand? I have continued this for 46 years and vice versa.

Conclusion: if your bf has not told you that he loves you, it appears that this may be a red flag for both of you. Also, some people have difficulty expressing themselves and this may be the case.

If so, you are going to have to take the bull by the horns and flat out ask him what he thinks of you. His reply should give you some idea of where he is coming from.

emjay's avatar

@john65pennington , that makes sense. I haven’t expected that from him because he has had relationship issues in the past, and I don’t want to push him. I know he DOES have issues expressing himself, a lot of which stem from things with his ex-fiance.

I really don’t expect him to say it, because we’re still not “officially” dating. (He thinks starting an actual relationship is a bad idea until he has his feet on the ground financially, which doesn’t bother me so much, but at this point I’m like, come on buddy… it’s been six months. What are we if not bf/gf?)

I’ve never been told by anyone (aside from the parents) that they love me. Its something I really, really crave.
And while I don’t want to waste my time, I also don’t want to push someone who I love into doing things faster than they are comfortable with, which could potentially cause me to lose them, and thereby causing me to have to deal with that great thing I have such an issue with—loss, be it death or break-up.

whitenoise's avatar

I think you just had a bad deam as a result of the stress you feel about possibly telling him you love him.

You are afraid of his reaction (anger stands for negativity in general) even if that would be him telling you that he loves you. When you get more emotionally involved you become more vulnerable and that makes him scary.

Hope it makes sense and that you don’t let your bad dreams get in the way of realizing your good ones.


SpatzieLover's avatar

It means you are over thinking things.

emjay's avatar

@SpatzieLover , that’s normal for me. Yesterday my friend told me that by the time she’s finished processing the basics on something I’ve already over thought it and given her a whole new mess of things to consider…

marinelife's avatar

If anything, your dreams say something about you and your feelings. They do nto channel real life. Your boyfriend was acting as an aspect of you in the dream.

It seems to reflect the turmoil that you have in real life about relationships and commitment.

GladysMensch's avatar

It means you were asleep, and your brain was putting on a show for you.
In my opinion, dreams are basically meaningless unless they’re recurring.

wundayatta's avatar

This has nothing to do with you bf and everything to do with thoughts roiling around in your own brain. This is stuff you need to think about, but don’t think it’s a message about him.

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