No it is not possible – if someone respects me and my girlfriend then they respect that I as an adult of sound mind and she as an adult of sound mind have the right to make our own decisions with regard to who we do and don’t want to marry – additionally, if someone respects me then they support me having the same exact rights and privileges as everyone else.
@SavoirFaire said it exactly perfectly – if you don’t support any form of marriage because you are against marriage all together then I would say you respect me because in that case you do want me/every other American to have the same equal rights and privileges. If you support some citizens having a certain set of rights and other citizens having a different set for any reason at all then you don’t respect that group which you are trying to limit and/or restrict.
Gay marriage is not something that is about what name we call it, it is not about us wanting to be accepted by everyone in some way or recognized by everyone in some positive fashion. It is purely and completely about equal rights. You can call it bamballstalisticism if you want to but in the end if bamballstalisticism doesn’t afford a person the same exact rights and privileges as those who are under the umbrella of legal marriage then it is nothing but a fictional name. Naming something different and not giving them the same equal rights is an even bigger insult and form of disrespect because it insinuates that the person receiving said new named but less rights thing is too stupid to realize it isn’t the same equal thing with marriage. It’s like thinking the person is such an idiot that they’d fall for a Jedi Mind trick. It’s as if you are trying to give someone 5 dimes in exchange for a dollar by tricking them into believing that since 5 is more than one they are somehow benefiting. What an asinine idea! There are over 1300 benefits afforded to those who are married that those who are single or under a domestic partnership do not have & in addition to those 1300 benefits there are many more things that those same single people or domestic partnered people pay for through the tax system that are given literally only to those who are married.
It is true that those benefits and payments apply to both heterosexual and homosexual single people or domestic partnered people, however it is not surprising that the average heterosexual single person isn’t hurt or offended or feeling disrespected or slighted because of those things because all heterosexual people have a choice between getting married or not. It is not to say that every gay person would run out and get married if it were legal to do so, but simply that they would have the free choice to do so if they want to. Just the same as all people don’t vote but they do have the right to choose whether or not they want to and if a citizen was prevented from voting based on gender, sexual orientation etc. the issue wouldn’t be about whether or not they were actually going to vote but rather whether they have the right to make that choice and act upon it in the first place.
With regard to the average person who is against gay marriage – the general reason for that view is a religious one and in our country that religious choice is generally related to Christianity. Christianity teaches that there is one omniscient/omnipotent God who knows all and has a plan that the average human isn’t privy to – hence the phrase “some of God’s greatest gifts are unanswered prayers”. The basic point is that we don’t always know what God has planned for one person or another etc. That said, it is a lack of faith that causes one to go against the teaching that their God is omniscient/omnipotent – contrary to the average Christian behavior one cannot have it both ways…. either God knows what he’s doing and has an omniscient/omnipotent plan for the people of this world or He doesn’t have it all under control and therefore we as individuals need to run around controlling everyone else because if we don’t the the Devil may win and have more of a population in the end than Heaven. The concept is laughable – the truth needs no defense so if God is omniscient then let him do his thing and remove your ego from the process because it is nothing but ego which causes one person to think they have the better answer over another and therefore are justified in removing that person’s rights, equality and privileges for their own good, the good of society etc. People who claim there is one omniscient/omnipotent God are just pretending they believe that lest they actually “let go and let God” handle it all as if all things are in Divine order. Jesus recommends to his followers that they leave to Caesar what is Caesar’s and focus on their own processes instead. Similarly he recommends that “he who is without sin cast the first stone” and yet with their vote the average Christian casts their punishment upon who they believe to be a sinner. Despite the fact that in the same exact books of the bible where it speaks against homosexuality it also speaks against a slew of other things that the majority of Christians do every day whether it be sleeping in the same bed with women who are on their period, eating shrimp and other sea creatures that are off limits, getting tattoos, cutting their hair in inappropriate manners etc etc.
Not to mention that the Constitution, Bill of Rights, Declaration of Independence etc. gives us a few rights. Two of which are the right to liberty and the pursuit of happiness and the separation of church and state. Liberty of course means to be free of oppressive restrictions within society so of course no one can oppress another of freedoms without breaking the legal documents our founders set for us to follow. This also means, based on separation of church and state, that any American who votes based on their religion technically is going against the Constitution etc. simply by default and is therefore removing the right of others to live a life that guarantees separation between church and state.
Additionally, not every religion is against gay marriage – there are many pagan sects for instance (among others) who are completely supportive of such marriages – by restricting those marriages from people of faith’s that support gay marriage you are restricting their freedom of religion… yet a third right afforded to all Americans.
There’s a kazillion ways to look at it, but lest someone be purely following their own religion without fault they are hypocritical for attempts to control others who break the religious teachings that are in verses literally right next to those the hypocrite themselves are breaking. And lest someone who lives as an American citizen is willing to allow all other citizens to have the rights afforded us in the documents drafted and passed by our founders with regard to freedom/liberty, pursuit of happiness, separation of church and state, religious freedom etc. they are not actually/nearly as patriotic and American as they claim their red blood to be.
