Social Question

Jeruba's avatar

What small soul-healing gifts do you give yourself without any fuss or fanfare?

Asked by Jeruba (45934points) September 28th, 2012

I didn’t really intend this to be a poison and antidote pair. It just turned out that way.

When the black flies of irritation, vexation, and frustration bite, what’s your flyswatter? What little and unannounced things do you resort to or do for yourself to get over those rough spots? Swearing? chocolate? a few minutes’ worth of virtual mayhem and slaughter?

Or do you have recourse to larger things?—a view of the mountains, and all is at peace? a thought of things eternal, allowing small annoyances to pass you by?

Sometimes I feel better after bitching about it. Sometimes I take a zenlike view of the thousand things. And sometimes I just say “Damnation. What an idiot.”

Observing members: 0 Composing members: 0

36 Answers

Coloma's avatar

A Happy Brownie and just wandering around my property in nature. Always a healing and peaceful experience. I can spend hours in a timeless space just communing with the animals and collecting seeds from my flowers and tending to my plants.
My favorite is to get a little high and water my yard, mist the trees, make rainbows, catch the breeze with the hose and mist myself. Happy Brownies and watering at sunset is my zen time. ;-)

YARNLADY's avatar

I sit out by my pool with my laptop and look at pictures on the image section of my search site, or go exploring on

tinyfaery's avatar

I treat myself to candy or another sugary sweet whenever I want to. I don’t really like living, but I do love sugar. Sometimes, that is all that keeps me going.

Trillian's avatar

Well, I sometimes take a bowl pack. I also talk to some like minded people which often helps. And of course, chocolate always lightens the perspective.

Jeruba's avatar

What does “take a bowl pack” mean?

gailcalled's avatar

I do something nice for me daily, even if its sitting on the deck here and admiring my view with Milo on my lap. Note pink flamingo in foreground

View from bench in woods

I am paying more and more attention to my diurnal rhythms also. If my body wants to stay up until 1:30. I let it and and refuse to feel that odd, inexplicable guilt about sleeping until 10.00 AM.

I am also getting better and better about not feeling irritated, vexed or frustrated.

Aethelwine's avatar

I like to step outside and enjoy the fresh air and sounds of all the critters outside.

gailcalled's avatar

^^^And surely admire your astonishing raindbow collection of peppers?

thorninmud's avatar

A mug of Earl Grey, three lumps and a dash of milk.

janbb's avatar

A hot bath with bath oil in it. Need one right about now.

Coloma's avatar

I just put in a call for my little massage girl to come over and give me an hour massage. I need one badly, my treat for this week. :-) She also brings me the medicinal brownie mix. What more can I ask for, home massage and happy brownie ingredients delivered to my doorstep. Only in California. lol

wundayatta's avatar

Deep mental breath, and let it go. Often accompanied by self-talk with various relevant messages.

Blondesjon's avatar

I kick a midget in the junk.

I don’t know if it does anything for the little guy but I feel outstanding afterwards.

Sunny2's avatar

I go to sleep. It’s an automatic reaction. If the music is too loud or the talk is too boring; If I’m really upset about something; If I can’t think things through just then . . . I fall asleep. All I have to do is sit down and I’m out. I usually wake up feeling much better.

ucme's avatar

Fart in the bank queue & blame it on the inevitable old woman loitering behind.

Mariah's avatar

No matter how busy I am, I take the “scenic” route between my dorm and the dining hall. It’s only a slightly longer walk, but instead of going along the road it goes through the treesy part of campus. My college town isn’t nearly as naturey as I’m used to, and I do miss it quite a bit while I’m here, so taking that extra time is a gift to myself. During the spring I can even manage some decent birdwatching while I’m walking from place to place.

Unless it is truly impossible, the hour before bed is reserved for pleasure reading/drawing/fluthering/gaming/whatever I want to do to unwind and get my mind off my work. Otherwise my brain tries to do math while I’m sleeping, and take it from me, that is not restful sleep.

Desserts. The only thing I like about being underweight is I don’t guilt myself for my desserts.

Shippy's avatar

Candles loads, all over, plus lavender burning in a oil burner. Buddha Bar chill music, or classical and a good friend to chat with on Yahoo. I find life hard at times and all of this creates a softness and peace. Or I rough and tumble the idiot that caused it (Joking)!

wonderingwhy's avatar

Meditation (a few seconds, an hour), playing with the cats, hiking, rock climbing, spend some time with wife or best friend; whichever of those happens to be handy at the time. But mostly it’s practicing not letting those things get to me like that in the first place and just let them go as quickly as they come.

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

I have a couple of nice paintings (cottage garden, van Gogh) and pictures (Whiteface Mountain) in the office, I pull them down and just stare into them. Or I just enjoy the scent of some of the candles and soaps my S/O likes.

Hawaii_Jake's avatar

When I feel irritated, I have a number of options to relieve the stress. I talk to a very trusted friend. I meditate. My best outlet is exercise. These things help me feel whole again.

If none of that works, then I use medication prescribed by my doctor.

cookieman's avatar

There is a Häagen Dazs walk-up counter in a mall near me. They offer the most amazing, all-natural, sugarless frozen yogurt. Blindfolded, you’d swear it’s a thick, rich soft-serve

I have them mix chocolate and vanilla together and make me a frappe.


blueiiznh's avatar

They vary depending on the timing and what I am feeling.
Laughter and fun with my daughter.
A phone call with a close friend or family member.
A bike ride or walk in nature.
A bubble bath.
A walk on the beach
A racquetball match to slam a little blue ball against the wall.
I build something

Coloma's avatar

6:30 Sunday evening, a home massage on the books and happy brownies coming up, but no happy endings. lololol
Well..the happy ending will be the mountain high brownies and a post massage soak in the hot tub. :-D

augustlan's avatar

My habits in this regard are not very healthy, unfortunately. I hate to admit it, but the very first thing I generally do is smoke a cigarette. Ahhhh. I might play a mindless computer game, or watch a bit of mindless TV, or take a nap. If it gets very bad, I eat comfort food (salty and sweet junk food, in my case) and take a nap. If it gets very, very bad, I take a Xanax. And a nap.

cazzie's avatar

For general frustration, I go for the sugar. What ever is sweet in the house and watch absolute crap TV shows to try to pretend I am somewhere else. When it gets really bad, I will write things somewhere and get it all out of me. If I happen to be passing a grocery store when the feelings hit, I buy myself a small bag of liquorice allsorts. It is my ‘trøstemat’. If I get a case of ‘acute anger’ I clean as long as the anger gives me the energy to do so, and then I calm down, have some trøstemat if there is any on hand and watch trash TV or if I am really feeling better after my cleaning sprint, I will do some constructive planning, research and crafting.

wildpotato's avatar

I kayak and disc golf to make myself calm again.

@Jeruba “take a bowl pack” means to smoke one pipeful of weed, and refers to the bowl of the pipe.

Coloma's avatar

I’m not up to date on the modern slang for smoking pot, I just call it smoking the peace pipe. lol

Dsg's avatar

For me it depends on the situation and where I am. My choices for myself consist of:
a glass of wine and a bubble bath with aromatherapy oil, candles, and soft music. Other times it might be calling a friend or family member, going for a walk and looking at nature, relaxing on the beach with a walk or sitting down watching the ocean, playing a board game with my children, baking, laughing, laughing and more laughing. If it is something that is really bothering me I will sometimes talk to my higher power and ask for strength.

Unbroken's avatar

Depends. I vent. I listen to reiki music, jazz, or classical. Something physical: like running, hiking, kayaking, biking. Bury myself in a book or look up quotes or write. My cat is a stress reliever, play a mental game we can divert ourselves into a more rational existence. Creating is something useful and consuming I go for smaller projects but am crafty. There are a wealth of ways. Tea is a great tamer I always feel decadent with Egyptian licorice tea.

Dsg's avatar

@rosehips Licorice tea? Oooh that sounds delicious. Is it black licorice? I’d love to find out more about it so I could look into buying some. Never thought of licorice as being a tamer. Hmm. Probably could use some. TY

Coloma's avatar

Today I am still scampering around in my nighty at 12:44 p.m. on a magnificent fall day. House wide open, breeze wafting through, filling the geeses swimming pool up on the lawn.
I guess I will get dressed soon, then again, maybe not, because I don’t HAVE to do anything today if I don’t want to! lol

Unbroken's avatar

@Daisygurl it is quite a luxury. Not black licorice. I just find its lovely. Not sure if it a tamer I like yogi brand. Sounds lovely. @Coloma

Coloma's avatar

@rosehips Welcome to Fluther, I love your name!

blueiiznh's avatar

sign me up for licorice tea also.

Unbroken's avatar

Got a kettle steaming and ready to sit back and laugh… You are welcome to join.

Answer this question




to answer.
Your answer will be saved while you login or join.

Have a question? Ask Fluther!

What do you know more about?
Knowledge Networking @ Fluther