Can you be a headline writer?

Probably not, but I do know a person who could his name is Ucme

Yes, but not for the Science pages of The Register. Here’s the headline on that. “Writer Never Ate at Boffin’s, but Overstuffing of it Makes Him Sick”.

For those unfamiliar with The Register see these headlines:
Reg boffins blow lid on sheepsecs
Plenty more fish (and other eukaryotes) in the sea, say boffins
Wireless boffins boost Wi-Fi hotspot performance 700%
And these are just a sample. There are plenty more where those came from.

If you’re not British, here’s what boffin means.

I remember that footy headline, genius stuff.
One I recall is, How do you solve a problem like Korea?
It’s taken from The Sun newspaper a few years back when Kim Jong flexed his nuclear test muscle…..great line.

The Sun (inevitably) had this caption to a picture of a kestrel and a barn owl seen fighting for food…
Hawk Kestrel Maneuvers in the Park

I can’t remember for sure but I think it was Poynter which had a section called Headline of the Day. Some of them included such classics as Dead Body Found in Cemetery, Kraft: Who Cut the Cheese? Tiger Woods Plays With Own Balls: Nike Says…

‘Headless Body Found in Topless Bar’ is objectively the best headline ever.

My dad was a copy editor in the 60s and 70s. Reporters wrote the stories but copy editors wrote the headlines. I wish he were around for this question, he had a great sense of humor and probably wrote some good ones.

Paul Wolfowitz (Feral NeoCon & World Bank Boss) Too Busy Ruining World To Buy Socks
and
Wolfowitz Pays Arab Gal $200,000 Per Year To Fuck Him

—Gotta love the Wonkette!

@TheProfoundPorcupine Super Caley have just done it again!!!!!!