General Question

babygalll's avatar

Sympathy card?

Asked by babygalll (2748points) June 13th, 2008

I have to send a sympathy card to my aunt whose sister passed aways. I never know what to say in a sympathy card. I never have trouble with other types of cards. I just can’t write a sympathy card. I need some help!

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10 Answers

osullivanbr's avatar

You need to keep it very simple and personal. From the heart.

I’ve always liked something along the lines of…
“May the peace that comes from memories of love shared comfort you now and in the times ahead”.

bearfair's avatar

I think the best thing, and the thing the mourner appreciates most, is to hear what you remember about the person who died (the good stuff). If you knew the woman who died, tell your aunt your favorite anecdote about her sister, like something she said or did once, or some personality trait you remember and will miss.

If you never met the woman, or don’t have anything in particular to say about her, you can always just tell your aunt that she’s in your thoughts and she has your love and support.

marinelife's avatar

I think both of those responses are wonderful encapsulations of what you can write. Even if finding the words is hard for you, your Aunt would appreciate your thoughtfulness in taking the time to buy a card and sign it and send it. You can always go with:

It is difficult to find words, but know that I am thinking about you now.

PupnTaco's avatar

Maybe a hand-written note would be more personal than a card?

marinelife's avatar

@PupnTaco Always, but for someone struggling with what to write in a card, a handwritten note might loom like Mt. Everest.

PupnTaco's avatar

Put it on a small piece of paper? ;)

susanc's avatar

I just lost someone and got a lot of cards.
Anecdotal survey of one:
the Hallmarky texts in the cards were really touching – maybe
said stuff the senders didn’t dare to write. Normally I’d be in the
get-some-small-plain-stationery-and-write-something-only-you-can-think-of camp, but
in this case, because it IS hard to say the right thing, a card can be good.

I agree that just saying you’re thinking about your aunt is plenty. It’s your care that really does the work.

that1mom's avatar

unfortunately I share the same issues you have with sympathy cards and such, so I am here to take advice rather than give it, bt good luck.

moe's avatar

My classmate sister died I need to write a sympathy letter to be read st the funeral and I need help. I don’t know what to write. I need something religous.

Jeruba's avatar

A personal note is important and means a lot, even if it’s just a few words. I usually begin with “Please accept my heartfelt…” or “Let me be one among many friends who…”

If I knew the deceased well but not the family, I say something about why the person was special to me, maybe mentioning some specific memory: “I’ll always remember the way she laughed,” “I’ll never forget the time we…,” “He was the greatest teacher I ever had.”

If I didn’t know the deceased, I focus my message on the person I’m sending it to: “It’s so hard to lose someone you love. Take the time to grieve, but hold onto the wonderful memories.”

Having lost both parents and received a lot of cards and floral tributes, I can say that the least polished-sounding messages sometimes mean the most because they come from the heart.

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