General Question

AstroChuck's avatar

Why is it that men always get cheated on holidays?

Asked by AstroChuck (37405points) June 15th, 2008 from iPhone

“This Mother’s Day, show her you care. Get her a diamond.” With Father’s Day we have to share with graduates. “Dads and Grads.” “Show Dad you care, get him a tie.”
Valentine’s Day is all about her. Just watch television ads or listen on the radio. It’s all Zale’s Jewelers or DeVons Jewelers. They don’t even bother advertising what to get the man.
It’s all about her. Am I wrong?

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38 Answers

playthebanjo's avatar

come on…if someone gave you a diamond tennis bracelet for fathers day wouldn’t you think it was a little weird?

phoenyx's avatar

I got some golfing discs for Father’s day; I’d much rather have them than clothes or jewelry.

Allie's avatar

Nope, you’re right, it’s all about us ladies. =]
Would you like a diamond necklace also? It’ll be in the shape of a heart on a delicate chain, just to let you know.
Ok, really, I turn “Father’s Day” into “Uncle’s Day” since my uncle is pretty much my father figure. He usually gets tools or sports stuff (UNC Tarheels or UT Vols related). One year it was golf clubs.

jrpowell's avatar

My orgasm is damn near guaranteed. It is a worthwhile trade-off.

AstroChuck's avatar

Allie, a nice watch with a diamond would be nice. Never heard an ad for that, though. The best I hear is get dad an Outback Steakhouse gift card.
I’m not trying to sound shallow and compare gift prices. Hell, my wife’s money is my money, and vice verse. It’s just B.S. Women usually get off on the cheap. Why does marketing focas on “what she wants?” and not “what he want?” I’m not ranting, just wondering why.

spendy's avatar

Generally, it’s the man in the relationship who has trouble remembering that it’s even a holiday. Just ask my husband. Typically women don’t need a reminder to be thoughtful or over-the-top. So…it makes sense that Retail America sees fit to nudge the guys with an influx of diamond commercials. Nothing like setting the bar high. ;)

Allie's avatar

AC: Haha, do men not like beef anymore? (I get what you’re saying though.)

mteutsch's avatar

I love the record player I got this year. Old SKOOL!

AstroChuck's avatar

I’m vegetarian, by the way.
Spendy- you watch too much TV. That is where you find the stereotype man who forgets his anniversary. I’ve never done that, and I don’t know of anyone else who has.

spendy's avatar

@Astro…nope, not too much TV. Just got lucky and married “that guy”.

playthebanjo's avatar

my anniversary is around christmas. It’s either the 22nd or 23rd. I am usually safe by combining the gifts and playing dumb. LOL

Allie's avatar

AC: Oh, ok, well then that’s definitely not the gift for you.

Mtl_zack's avatar

have you ever heard of steak and blowjob day? its on march 14, a month after valentines day. since the man buys diamonds and gold for his girl, the girl has to repay him with a steak and a blowjob. i think its an equal trade off.

playthebanjo's avatar

on that day you can add lobster tail for $4.59.

PupnTaco's avatar

I had a theory about this.

Mother’s Day: “Honey, for Mother’s Day I want some peace & quiet. You take the kids out and leave me alone for a day.”

Father’s Day: “Honey, you don’t spend enough time with the kids and they love their Daddy. Why don’t you take them out somewhere so they can have some time with you and I’ll stay here.”

spendy's avatar

@PupnTaco…would you please send that memo out to all the other dads? ;)

PupnTaco's avatar

Based on the number of solo dads I see out with their kids on both days, the memo has gone out a long time ago, and to great success. :/

spendy's avatar

Hmmm…I’ll need to send you my address. Missed one.

Cardinal's avatar

I really think they don’t much care.

Trance24's avatar

Most of the time men don’t really care, so I think they advertise it less. Women always want something even when they say nothing. But I do sympathize with you fellow fluther males. I think women do always get more, and your wallet gets less. Its great to get gifts, but I wouldn’t expect some huge gift for every “Woman oriented” holiday. Its a waste of money. Something nice for Christmas works, flowers and chocolate work for the others. Happy Father’s day Fluther dads.

marinelife's avatar

What a self pitying pile of crap. What about golf club sets and golf vacations, Hummers and other expensive cars, guns, motorcycles, snow mobiles, dirt bikes? Give me an effing break—poor men indeed!

PupnTaco's avatar

@ Marina, that may be true for some men, but I can’t personally tally one item on your list. And wouldn’t want to!

My post above about Mother’s Day vs. Father’s Day was meant to be light-hearted “kidding on the square.”

Viva le difference!

AstroChuck's avatar

Marina, you are reading other things into my question. I am not self pitying and am definately not a sexest. My question is simple. Why? Why do advertisers focus on what to get her. Some of you woman are way too sensitive. Read that statement any way you like. If you really think that Valentine’s day is a day for both sexes, then you are not paying attention to the media.

PupnTaco's avatar

p.s. @ Marina: what about Coach purses, 80 pairs of shoes, Starbucks daily, etc.? Goes both ways. ;)

Trance24's avatar

@Mariana I agree with astrochuck. He isn’t being sexiest at all. Just pointing out how the media presents the holidays. They generally do base it on “her”. Most men spend more on the women then women spend on the men. Not saying all, but most.

marinelife's avatar

@PupnTaco Not to say men are grasping or selfish. I was responding to the general tone of the posts. For the record, I do not own a single diamond tennis bracelet.

@AstroChuck & PnT Peace, mis amigos. I probably should have emoticoned my post. It was largely tongue in cheek.

As to why, AC, the blame falls squarely on marketers. I would dare to say they don’t focus as much on advertising to women about buying gifts for men, because women are the buyers of much of the stuff without too much urging. Really, though, I have seen a bunch of ads for Father’s Day for Lowe’s and Home Depot gift cards and merchandise, for Craftsman and other tools, for men’s clothing. I am not sure that the premise is totally accurate.

PupnTaco's avatar

We’re all cool like a couple of Fonzies.

mcbealer's avatar

I think the whole mentality of having to buy something for these dates is out of control in today’s society, due to the machinery of advertising and the age old monster called Keeping Up with the Jones.

I say bypass the expensive gifts, and instead spend time with that member of your family, or meaningful mentor. Recognize them on that day in a nonmaterialistic way.

Afterall, what good is an expensive gift one day out of the year if the rest of the year you are at odds/nonsupportive?

that’s just my own soapbox

To answer Astrochuck,
Yes, there is a glaring imbalance to the holiday machinery, with women generally favored.

AstroChuck's avatar

That’s obvious. The question is why?

NOharmNOfoul's avatar

AC I’ll tell you why, because we men just settle for the tie or outback steak house gift card that’s why. Try giving your wife or girlfriend a scarf or a gift card to olive garden…. The next morning you will have divorce papers ready to sign…..
LOL (marina its just a joke).

Allie's avatar

NO: Hahaha, that was funny. There’s an idea AC, maybe you should hold out for a bit more?

ninjaxmarc's avatar

I don’t mind as long as she takes care of me until the next year or holiday.

astrochuck: you should tell them to start advertising for that watch you always wanted.

wildflower's avatar

Most blokes I know don’t care for diamond rings or pamper days at the spa…...but you might be the exception.

playthebanjo's avatar

hmm… a pamper day at the spa… that where they put you in a diaper? somehow that sounds like it leaves a bit to be desired.

wildflower's avatar

I rest my case!

newfietom's avatar

OH COOL!!! Finally I don’t feel all alone anymore. I was TRYING for YEARS to convince myself that was ok—- that was the way it was meant to be… But NO!!! Mother’s Day, I get up at the crack to make breakfast (with the help of two toddlers—OH GOD!!!), then dad gives Tiffany, Waterford or some other shiny gift (as long as it AIN’T shiny-like-a-toaster-shiny…. NOOOOO That’s not acceptable. Then you clean up, take the kids out so mom gets a break… the day goes on like that.

Fathers Day. Exwife (now you understand, huh?) gets up with kids AFTER they jumped on me in bed to say—no—SCREAM! “Happy Fathers Day” The kids stay there I ex goes to the kitchen to get me standby breakfast in bed: Cereal, juice, fruit and coffee. Same for the kids. She already ate. I carry out the dishes when the kids won’t stop whining to go to the park with me. I leave her at home til I’m nearly exhausted and I go home with just enough time to get a shower and go to McDonalds Playland for dinner with the kids…. Oh, and gift… I almost forgot those CUTE homemade cards… all three out of one big piece of paper. Anyway, the gift. It was a set of drill bits, set of skrewdrivers and a random orbital sander which I had picked out with at Home Depots her earlier that week.

Those precious fathers day memories.


Larssenabdo's avatar

You’re not wrong Astrochuck. Women get diamonds; men get a card which says, “It’s YOUR DAY, Honey! So put your feet up…” which they can read as they are headed out to McDonald’s Playland, the park, the zoo, or anyplace but in the house.
It’s Madison Avenue, too—they make guys scared for their lives if they fail to come through with something appropriately sparkly.

zen_'s avatar

@AstroChuck So what you’re saying is Buy Zale’s Jewellery, right? How much they paying you, and where can I get in on the not-so-subtle subliminal advertising in questions action?

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