General Question

tenureandandlemons's avatar

What are the rules for sharing a bathroom with people who aren't allowed to?

Asked by tenureandandlemons (159points) August 10th, 2013

I have the upstairs bathroom and everyone uses it and doesn’t replace the toilet paper and I got hell for hanging my boxers up to dry on the shower curtain rod… This person has her own private washroom and doesn’t stop anyone from using my washroom… People in the house have Head Lice and Scabies and they refuse to use their own bathroom, people just avoid the bathtub in the basement and use mine, because it is cleaner… So I just took out my towels and toilet paper and war is brewing.
What worked for you?... I seem to wash after neighbors who use my bathroom without remorse and they do it right in front of me.

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30 Answers

rojo's avatar

Can’t say that I have ever been in a similar situation but I think I would been much less patient than you and pulled the towels and paper out way before now.
So, who is gonna give you hell for taking what is yours with you to your room? The freeloaders? The freeloader friends of freeloaders?
Let ‘em bitch.
If they retaliate, the next step is change the door lock to one that requires a key and provide a key only to those who are supposed to use it.

flo's avatar

Even if they were cleaning up etc., it is wrong for them to use your washroom if you didn’t give them permisssion.
“This person has her own private washroom and doesn’t stop anyone from using my washroom”
Would you provide more details? What is the relashinship between you all?

Response moderated (Unhelpful)
tenureandandlemons's avatar

@flo 7 bedrooms in a boarding house 7 more next door… the top floor washroom is thought to be public. One lady has her own private bathroom in her bedroom… the second person who is to use my washroom hasn’t moved in yet, people downstairs don’t care if they use my shower and use my towels… The lady who has her own bathroom told me that another women is moving into the empty room and I shouldn’t hang my boxers in my bathroom. Then she tried intimidating me by complaining to the mean landlord because I was friends with the other. I get scared that I would be homeless if I was evicted. I’m on disability for being mentally ill and I guess if I was kicked out they would have to find me some where to live.

flo's avatar

Okay. I’m sure someone will post a way of solving this problem, but in the meantime I can’t think of one. They know your story, what you’re afraid of, and they are taking advantage. I feel for you.

janbb's avatar

Is it definite that this bathroom is there for your exclusive use or might that be a misunderstanding on your part?

flo's avatar

@tenureandandlemons Do you see a social worker (someone who checks up how everything is going) or someone like that on a regular basis? They might get the landlord to make sure you have a key for the washroom? I don’t know I’m just guessing here, (I don’t want to give you false hopes) I have no real knowledge in this area.

Edit to add: It sounds like I’m stretching the mandate of the social worker, but just report it to anyone like that before things escalate. Ignore their bitching, hopefully, they’ll stop.

tenureandandlemons's avatar

@janbb I’m only 1 of 2 people allowed to use the bathroom, but the landlords let the rules slide and then threaten us with hiring a maid to clean up after us, and to have it billed to our rent. I was called a pig and told that I need my mommy to look after me.

janbb's avatar

@tenureandandlemons I’m sorry your having this problem. It must be difficult.

filmfann's avatar

If other people using your bathroom have scabies and head lice, you should put a lock on the bathroom door. This is a health issue.

YARNLADY's avatar

If it’s your private bath according to your rental agreement, exchange the current door fixture with a locking door fixture.

downtide's avatar

Get a lock for the door (and give a spare key to the one other person who is allowed to use it).

LornaLove's avatar

Perhaps a bring your own toilet paper and towels rule?

dabbler's avatar

I don’t see how anyone has a right to complain if you take your towels and paper out – do they expect you to provide for them? They certainly aren’t providing for you.

LuckyGuy's avatar

You are in a tough spot. For one or two weeks remove the toilet paper and dry clean towels. Leave an empty roll or one sheet. Do the same with soap. Leave just a sliver.
For those two weeks you can have all your supplies in a bag and take it with you when you use the bathroom. That will leave unwanted visitors high and dry.
Important! Don’t tell anyone you are doing this. You want it to be a surprise.

Good luck.

flo's avatar

I think @tenureandandlemons is thinking rightly, that the landlord is the one who should handle these things, but believes is lenient on the other tenants, if I’m not mistaken. I wouldn’t recommend changing locks she will have a problem with landlord since it is not her property.

YARNLADY's avatar

Tenants are allowed to place locks on the places they are renting, such as their own room and a private bathroom.

snowberry's avatar

Perhaps your local housing authority could give you direction on this.

janbb's avatar

I think the fact that it is a group home may be a factor in the bathroom use issue.

flo's avatar

@YARNLADY Is that common?

@snowberry Good idea

YARNLADY's avatar

@flo It depends on the rooming house, but California, the landlord only has the right to enter your room with 24 hours notice, and you have the right to restrict entry to them and anyone else, by using a lock.

flo's avatar

@YARNLADY But once you change your lock, you have to be home if landlord needs to come to do some repair etc.

YARNLADY's avatar

@flo No, you simply leave the door unlocked at the specific time. By the way, how many times has you landlord needed to come into your apartment for repairs?

rojo's avatar

We have it written into our leases that you CANNOT change your lock or add further locks. To do so is a violation of the lease and will get your butt kicked out on the street.

if I am in one of my moods, otherwise you just get a stern talking to and have to put it back the way you found it.

YARNLADY's avatar

@rojo Even a written lease must agree with the local ordinance. If you have an invalid clause, the tenant can ignore it.

rojo's avatar

Not an invalid clause if you provide a lock that cannot be activated from the outside, allowing the tenant to lock him or herself in when they are there but not when they are not present. Access to the unit must be available for emergency situations.

flo's avatar

@YARNLADY I’ve never needed repairs to be done.
“No, you simply leave the door unlocked at the specific time.” How would it work for anyone who works outside the home all day esp. far away? I wouldn’t want take a chance burglary-wise.

If the bathtub upstairs overfloods, etc. I would like landlord to be able to keep the damage to my place to a minimum. And I really can’t see the caretaker/landlord of a building having the key as unreasonable thing unless things have happened to warrant mistrust, in which case I wouldn’t want to live there.

snowberry's avatar

You could try putting new locks on the door, with a note. Tell them “If you want to use my bathroom call (phone number).”

Did you ever call your landlord and tell him what’s going on? What did he say?

Please update us.

tenureandandlemons's avatar

I moved to the landlords house. I now share a bathroom with four men… and no one else… I supply the toilet paper and one squishes the spiders and we all do what we can to keep the bathroom clean.

flo's avatar

Why isn’t each person supplying his own toilet paper?

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