Social Question

Dutchess_III's avatar

Should there be some controls over displaying certain really graphic movie titles, espcially on mainstream media? (NSFW)

Asked by Dutchess_III (43239points) September 23rd, 2013

I never dreamed I’d ask a NSFW question, but I’m really pissed.

We got Direct TV, and smack in the middle of the movies list are about 3 porn channels. It’s obvious what they are by the titles.

There is one channel in particular that seems to focus on incest, with a suggestion of child porn. It has titles like “Daddy’s Little Girl Can’t Stop Masturbating!” One showed up the other day that said, “Baby, Don’t Tell Your Mommy!”

If I still had kids in the house I would have cancelled D-TV the instant I saw them.

If it’s illegal to utter the word “bomb” in an airport, because of the implication, it seems like the same logic should be applied to suggestive allusion to incest and child sex.

Your thoughts?

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55 Answers

zenvelo's avatar

I don’t have Direct TV, but my cable company has parental controls. Does Direct TV? I’d complain to them that you need a way to block that kind of stuff if you don’t want to see it.

Dutchess_III's avatar

It does have parental controls, but it only stops the kids from selecting the channel. It doesn’t hide the titles.

zenvelo's avatar

I’d still complain, and let them know you’ll call your local TV stations and newspapers for mixing porn in with family movies.

elbanditoroso's avatar

Censorship is censorship.

Suppose some pressure group wants to censor the word “god”. Or ‘freedom” because it offends them.

Once you start, where do you stop?

Dutchess_III's avatar

Well, it isn’t really family movies, per se. There is a heading called Family and Kid’s channels, which is where I’d live if it were up to me. They have the cool channels, like Nat Geo and Discovery.
The porn channels are listed under the general Movie and Events heading. Like anything else, some of the movies listed are OK for kids, some are not (like Con Air. I still owe my son 3 banana splits over that one!)

@elbanditoroso, I’m referring specifically to the titles that suggest activities that are illegal, and with good reason.
The others, “Naked Co-Eds Washing Cars” and the like are just ridiculous, in my book. Still not something I’d want my kids to see, but I can just ignore them.

Blackberry's avatar

How old are the kids? Are they at an age where this thing can be explained by an adult?

Dutchess_III's avatar

My kids are grown and out of the house. However, if they were home, I wouldn’t care if they were 17, I’d still get rid of the trash. Why should I have to “explain” such perversion to anyone? And exactly what would I explain?

livelaughlove21's avatar

@Dutchess_III “Why should I have to “explain” such perversion to anyone?”

Because it’s part of the real world that they’ll eventually be exposed to anyway. And, at 17, they’ve heard much worse than, “Baby, don’t tell your Mommy!” Much younger kids probably won’t even understand what that actually means.

Dutchess_III's avatar

How do you know that @livelaughlove21? I hadn’t heard of fathers having sex with their daughters by the time I was 18. I wasn’t exposed to that idea, or child molestation in general, never crossed my mind until I was much, much older.

Also, that argument of “That’s the real world,” anything goes and should be exposed is BS to me. When I had daycare, I had a set of parents who let their 8 and 10 year old children watch cable TV all night long unsupervised. They used that “real world” argument as their excuse.

My argument is that my kids may come across it it in their travels, and they may even talk to me about their discoveries (or not) but they will NOT come across that trash in MY WORLD, the world I’ve created for them.

“Mom / Grandma! I’ve seen that a thousand times!”
“Not in THIS house you haven’t.”

It is the expectation I set for them. Whether they accept it as their own as adults is up to them.

Aethelwine's avatar

We have Direct TV and there is a way to remove these channels so children can’t see the titles.

if you need help, I can find out later exactly how to go about it

Dutchess_III's avatar

Oh, thank you @jonsblond. I asked the D-TV guy if there was a way and he said No.

livelaughlove21's avatar

@Dutchess_III Kids these days are exposed to more now (mostly through other kids) than they once were. I certainly knew about child molestation at an early age and knew that it was wrong and ways I could avoid being a victim of it.

I never said very young kids should be forcibly exposed because it’s something in the real world. But IF they are exposed, it should be explained to them instead of swept under the rug. Even if you can hide the titles from your television doesn’t mean you can hide them from everyone else’s.

“they will NOT come across that trash in MY WORLD”

Too bad those kids won’t live in your world forever. It’s a parent’s job to prepare their children for what they might be exposed to in THEIR world, so they know how to react to such things.

Aethelwine's avatar

From the DirectTV answer center: Yes, we want to make sure you can easily hide Adult content from younger viewers.

Just follow these steps to hide the Adults Only icon and all Adult channels in the channel guide:
1. Press MENU on your remote
2. Select Settings & Help
3. Select Parental Controls
4. Select Adult Channels
5. Press the SELECT button again to change your setting to “Hide Adult.”

To change it back to “Show Adult,” just repeat the steps above.

@Dutchess_III Is this what you said you’ve already done and it didn’t help? (sorry, I’m still waking up and the coffee hasn’t kicked in yet)

Dutchess_III's avatar

Well, at this point my adult children are creating the same kind of world for their kids, a gentle, educational environment with as little adult bullshit in it as possible, and, to a kid, they are great kids, so I would say I was successful @livelaughlove21. The proof is in the pudding.

And, according to your argument, why not deliberately expose them to fathers have sex with their children, kids killing and dismembering helpless animals, serial killers, mothers getting drunk and beating the shit out of their toddlers, street life where kids are overdosing in the most gruesome ways, so you can explain all of this real world stuff to them before they’re exposed to it ,which they will be some day?

Thank you @jonsblond. I’ll get back on it now. I did a little looking around a minute ago…..I never turn the TV on during the day. Damn. All the good movies are on during the day! And I couldn’t find any porn. Why is there no porn around when you want it?

cookieman's avatar

I don’t know, but could you repeat the question… s l o w l e y ?

I’m teasing. @jonsblond has the solution.

Dutchess_III's avatar

Ha ha! When my son was 16 he wanted to watch “Conair.” I said, “Nope. Too violent.”
He kept trying to talk me into it. Finally he challenged me to a game of poker for it. If he lost, he had to do the dishes for a week without being asked. If he won he got to watch Conair.

The little shit won.

That was 10 years ago.

The other day I sent him a text. “We’re watching that movie you’re not allowed to watch.”
He said, “Conair?”
“Yep. Really violent. But I wouldn’t know because I’m not allowed to watch it either.”
He just sent back “Ha ha!”

livelaughlove21's avatar

@Dutchess_III Yeah, that’s exactly what I meant. You sure have me figured out!

I’m sure your daughter is the world’s greatest parent, all because she overprotects her kids from adult “bullshit.” And I’m sure her kids will be adults before they know any of that horrible grown-up stuff…because that’s totally how the world works.

Your argument sounds like those parents that get pissed if their kids see two men or two women kissing in public because they don’t want their children exposed to it. Sorry folks, you don’t get to decide what your kids will eventually be exposed to.

And no, I’m not comparing daddy/daughter porn to homosexuality. The argument just sounds awful similar. Some parents, unfortunately, wouldn’t see a distinction between the two.

ucme's avatar

I’d never heard of them, so I checked out their website & two things stand out.
1. They’re called DIRECTV
2. Very competitive rates.

That’s all I got.

Dutchess_III's avatar

@livelaughlove21 It was a serious question. Why not go ahead and expose them to all the adult real world stuff, no matter how dark and deep, so you can discuss it with them / prepare them for it so that when they do see it at a friend’s house or where ever, they’ll know how to react? Also, so they won’t be shocked.

Dutchess_III's avatar

BTW…it’s two daughters and a son. One daughter has two sons, 14 and 18, other daughter has 4 kids, infant twins and an 8 and 10 year old, and my son has a 5 year old, a 2 year old and a baby due any day.

Katniss's avatar

I found out that my son, at 13, was watching porn. I was horrified. To me he was still a baby.
I called my sister crying because I didn’t know what to do.
She laughed. I was not amused
After discussing it with some friends, they assured me that it was completely normal and that their sons had done the same thing.
I really didn’t feel any better and 5 years later it still bothers me. lol

@Dutchess_III Those titles are disgusting!!

livelaughlove21's avatar

@Dutchess_III Real question or not, it’s ridiculous. Deliberate exposure is not the argument I made. My argument is that you’re in denial if you believe your home is the only place in which these kids are exposed to real shit. They are exposed to more than you think, earlier than you think. And I’d rather my kids learn about these things from me than their little friends that don’t know what they’re talking about. That doesn’t mean I’m going to show pictures of a crime scene involving a rape/murder to a four-year-old.

Going to great lengths to protect them from these issues isn’t helpful to them, either. It’s simply a way for the parents to avoid talking to their kids about difficult topics. If and when they are exposed to these things, it should be addressed instead of avoided.

Dutchess_III's avatar

To address your statement “And I’d rather my kids learn about these things from me than their little friends that don’t know what they’re talking about.” Then you should deliberately expose them to “these things.” Yet when I say that, you act outraged, and I’m not sure why. Why wouldn’t you deliberately expose them to all the things you’re so sure they’re going to find out at a young age so they can learn it from you first? Just sit right down with your 13 year old and watch incestual porn. That IS the subject here and it IS what you are suggesting, aren’t you? Or just leave it there and available for him or her to watch on their own? What would your game plan actually BE, @livelaughlove21?

It is our job to protect our kids as best we can. Anyone who doesn’t feel that way is just looking for an excuse to not have to adjust their own behaviors and desires for the sake of their children.

Mama_Cakes's avatar

@Dutchess_III I can’t see incestual porn being allowed on satellite t.v..

Dutchess_III's avatar

@Mama_Cakes They allude to it in the titles. See the details.
I have printed off @jonsblond‘s instructions on how to block the titles. I just wouldn’t want my 10 year old grand daughter coming in and happen to be flipping through channels asking, “What is that?” Although according to @livelaughlove21, we should just get some popcorn and have a movie night together so she can learn about “these things” from me first.

livelaughlove21's avatar

@Dutchess_III I’m not outraged by anything and I’ve given no indication that I am. I’m a bit exhausted by your attempts to tell me what my argument is and make it sound ridiculous by extrapolating my statements. Your question doesn’t even deserve a response, and I’ve stated my stance multiple times, but here it is one last time: My “game plan” would be to not go to great lengths to protect my kids from these topics and, when they are exposed to it, be open and honest regarding that topic. Simple as that.

I say keep the the TV as it is because blocking those titles won’t stop the kids from being exposed and you reply by acting as if I am saying you should pay for the adult channels so you can turn it on when the kids are there. Seriously?

If you can’t pose a rational response to my argument, I have no interest in continuing here. Peace.

@Mama_Cakes Daddy/daughter porn stars are not actually related. It’s simply an older man and a barely legal girl that play the roles of father and daughter.

Dutchess_III's avatar

Ok, let’s take an example. Your 10 year old son or daughter happens to notice the titles, such as the one listed in the details. She asks what it is. What is your response?

Mama_Cakes's avatar

Luckily, we have the CRTC here in Canada. None of those titles would fly.

Dutchess_III's avatar

I’m moving to Canada.

antimatter's avatar

I don’t think it’s a good thing.
South Africa banned all porn related channels, believe it or not there is still a censor board controlled by religious institutions in South Africa

Aethelwine's avatar

@livelaughlove21

I didn’t know what porn was until my early teen years. We didn’t have unlimited access to porn in the 80s. A nine year old girl does not want to see or hear about some of these porn titles. I know this because I was nine once and my daughter is nine years old now. There’s nothing wrong with limiting access to porn for young children. Sure, they will come across it eventually, as they grow older, but at 9 or 10 years old? I know the friends of my daughter and I know who she is with at all times and what she’s exposed to. I can guarantee she’s not looking at porn. She’s still grossed out when she sees couples kissing on the television. When she’s a bit older I won’t hide this stuff from her, but right now I’m with @Dutchess_III on this. Children under a certain age do not need to be exposed to porn. We do have a little experience raising children. just sayin’

livelaughlove21's avatar

@Dutchess_III I would calmly explain to her what pornography is and why people watch it. I would answer any questions she may have about it and discourage her from watching it by sharing my values regarding pornography.

Conversations about sex and porn should happen early. When a child receives accurate information about these topics when they’re young, they’ll be better equipped to deal with it when they encounter it in a more intense way. Ten is a great age to have these talks – not too young to understand but not old enough that they may already be doing these things (hopefully). It’s even better if the child comes to you about it in the first place, before their friends fill their heads with inaccurate information about these difficult topics.

@jonsblond I’m not going to say what I’ve already said so many times. If you choose to believe I stated something I didn’t, that’s perfectly fine.

I may not be a parent, but it wasn’t that long ago that I was a child and I know what I was exposed to. I also interact with kids quite often and I know that they are aware of things way before mom and dad know it. My husband was exposed to porn at the age of 10 on his own. A kid my friend teaches lost her virginity at 11, as did the sister of another friend of mine.

You don’t have to have kids to know what types of things they’re exposed to. In fact, parents are often the last to know, whether they’re willing to admit that or not.

Dutchess_III's avatar

OK. Let’s do some role playing Calmly explain to me what pornography is. Let’s take the title, “Daddy’s Little Girl Can’t Stop Masturbating!” as our spring board, as mentioned in the title. Just tell me what you would tell her.

Dutchess_III's avatar

@jonsblond Mine’s set up a little differently. I get to Parental Controls, but there is no “Adult Channels” listed.
I can block the channels (I blocked QVC as an experiment) but it still shows the title. Grrrr. I’ll keep looking.

livelaughlove21's avatar

@Dutchess_III I’m not a performing circus monkey and I have no interest in your role play, but thank you for the offer. It’s not up to me how parents talk to their kids. What I’d say to mine is inconsequential here. Unless you think there’s no appropriate way to discuss sex with a 10-year-old, the way to do it isn’t rocket science and would also depend on how you normally relate to your kid. Same thing with porn.

I’m done here. This conversation has gotten way more aggravating than it’s worth. I couldn’t care less how you or anyone else decide to parent their children. I’m simply sharing my opinion on the subject, which you asked for by posting the question. We obviously disagree, so harping on it won’t get us anywhere. You aren’t going to convince me to agree with you and vice versa.

Dutchess_III's avatar

Well, no luck. Called D-TV. No way to block the titles. I’ll set up my favorites list, maybe that will take care of it.

@livelaughlove21 Practicing handling situations that you WILL be facing some day is always a good idea, just like practicing for an interview with a friend.

I have never had a problem explaining sex to my kids, at any age. However, porn is a different angle on it, and I can fully understand your reluctance to participate in the role play. I don’t imagine you’ll be any more eager to explain “masturbating” to your 10 year old, or eager to explain that that man isn’t really her father, they’re just pretending, than you are to the adults here.

Good luck.

Eggie's avatar

I have Direct, and I totally understand and agree with what you are saying. Anyone and I mean anyone who is literate can read what are in the titles. They really should censor the titles.

Dutchess_III's avatar

So do you have your favorites list set up @Eggie?

Hypocrisy_Central's avatar

I’m referring specifically to the titles that suggest activities that are illegal, and with good reason.
Not to discount your indignation to having that stuff come over your TV listing, IMO they are just titles. I am sure the content is nothing like the title in the since you are not having child actors in them. I can see no real difference than having a title that doesn’t show or express murder and killing and have the body count clock in at a dozen and a half before 15 minutes of the movie has aired. Be it an illegal sounding title, or action depicting illegal activity, IE, murder, heist, robbery, dope taking, etc. it is what it is. There are many things I would not want blaring through stereo speakers in my home or content on TV or within certain movies, but it will happen. The only way I can hopefully never encounter them is never watch TV or listen to any radio.

(generally) Daddy/daughter porn stars are not actually related. It’s simply an older man and a barely legal girl that play the roles of father and daughter.
If the younger actor is playing as if he/she is under 18 (the de facto legal age for Hollywood) what does that say about the masses; they will scream ”those perverts” from the street corner but tune in with the beer and popcorn when away from prying eyes. If there is a genre for that content there must be enough viewers to support it.

@jonsblond Sure, they will come across it eventually, as they grow older, but at 9 or 10 years old?
Don’t count on it being that late. If they are on a computer without Net Nannies, etc, simple innocuous words in a search and pull up porn content with no holds barred photos. A 7 year old today can pull up adult content you would not even find when I was that age even if you found your dad’s, uncle’s, etc stash of Playboys.

Do we really care if they do? Is there any certain way to know that any harm comes from watching porn at that early age? In spite of all of the studies done, I am not sure anyone can truly measure the impact it has on the child or society.

Eggie's avatar

Favorites list?

Aethelwine's avatar

@Hypocrisy_Central A 7 year old today can pull up adult content
Not on the computer my daughter uses. I control what she can and can’t see. Maybe a child who has no adult supervision can pull up whatever they want, but I’m a responsible parent who pays attention to what her child does.

Is there any certain way to know that any harm comes from watching porn at that early age? If children as young as 11 (according to livelaughlove) are having sex, then yes, there is harm in watching porn at a very young age. I have a feeling these 11 year old children watched porn at a young age. I had no idea what porn was at that age and I had no desire to even kiss a boy at age 11.

Eggie's avatar

(response withdrawn)

Blondesjon's avatar

What the fuck?!?

We have unlimited access to porn in the house and nobody told me?

i’ve been getting pretty tired of using all those old issues of good housekeeping

Hypocrisy_Central's avatar

@jonsblond If children as young as 11 (according to livelaughlove) are having sex, then yes, there is harm in watching porn at a very young age.
Playing Devil’s advocate here for a moment, which would be to assume children having sex was harmful.Some would say it is just a natural part of life and growing up. If so, then there is the slippery slope as to which children will be harmed, 11yr olds but not 14yr olds, 13yr olds would be but not 16yr olds? What about those 13yr olds who have hit puberty as opposed to those who haven’t? Not to say you are not correct but there is wiggle room for people who don’t care as much to make an argument.

Dutchess_III's avatar

If 11 year old children are having sex, I’d hazard they’re either being raped or molested. Of course, they could look like they’re 20, in which case it’s OK.

11 is still grade school.

Aethelwine's avatar

@Hypocrisy_Central My first sexual experience at the age of 15 scared me for life. I was used by the guy and I learned at an early age that all I was good for was sex. It took me a long time to realize I had more to offer. I can only imagine what an 11 year old is thinking when they are having sex. It can’t be good for them. I don’t see one good thing about 11 year old children having sex.

Dutchess_III's avatar

My first sexual experience at 15 didn’t scar me, but it certainly wasn’t the least bit fulfilling or even enjoyable. I can only imagine the experience for a child only a little more than half my size who isn’t even finished growing or playing with dolls.

Hypocrisy_Central's avatar

@Dutchess_III If 11 year old children are having sex, I’d hazard they’re either being raped or molested.
Two things, I would not gander many people would see it as the person being raped or molested if they are having sex with another 11yr old, a 10yr old (them being 11yr), or someone between 12 and 14yr; it would be seen as innocent experimentation or something.

Second, at a comparable age children today are exposed to way more than in times past. The images that can be seen off cable TV you could not see when I was a kid. Heck, even in the movies the end scene from the Taxi Driver was critically slammed as being too gory and bloody. Today that ending sequence of the Taxi Driver is like something that fell out of a nun’s satchel at the rectory; the gore and blood of murders in movies today abounds 8 times more; the bedroom scenes as well. You may not see the in and out action but all the bodies are in the right places making the right moans, even if covered by a sheet; I can’t even remember seeing anything like that until The Sailor Who Fell Out Of Grace With The Sea showed on cable. These days media, society, whatever seems to be driving kids to maturity as if it were by a sixe 14 shoe kicking them in the behind driving them like cattle.

My first sexual experience at 15 didn’t scar me, but it certainly wasn’t the least bit fulfilling or even enjoyable.
The cancellation prize is it was a source of lore for whoever got the cherry; to be bragged about in bars, locker rooms, and parties. Even if he (if it was a she, then it would be different) didn’t like it, he got something priceless out of it to take with him in life.

@jonsblond I was used by the guy and I learned at an early age that all I was good for was sex.
To be used by someone 15 to 18yr old is no better than being used by a person 31yr old; used is used. The only difference is society believes if you got used by another minor there is no foul, no crime, and no need to punish anyone, how ironic.

Dutchess_III's avatar

I would assume the same would be said of two 11 year olds having sex. Nothing in it for the girl child at all, just bragging rights for the little boy child.

Hypocrisy_Central's avatar

^ Happy to help you lurve though~ ;-)

Blondesjon's avatar

@Hypocrisy_Central . . . You do understand just because a person is able to disagree with you succinctly it doesn’t mean they are simply fishing for lurve, right?

feed it to me folks. gotta gets me fix.

Hypocrisy_Central's avatar

@Blondesjon But those witty quips do seem to produce lurve to the one who uttered it more times than not 8-o

Mama_Cakes's avatar

I’m not here for the lurve.

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