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this_velvet_glove_again's avatar

What would you do if your 4-year-old acted like this? (read inside)

Asked by this_velvet_glove_again (418points) March 28th, 2014

What would you do if your 4-year-old child tortured birds, was really mean to other kids (mostly small babies when left alone), didn’t have any friends and “killed” her dolls as a game?

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23 Answers

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

Please say you’re kidding.

livelaughlove21's avatar

Hm…I’d start reading Baby Serial Killers for Dummies and sleep with one eye open. Torturing animals, antisocial, and aggressive at four? Yikes! Honestly, I’d probably look into some type of therapy. That sounds so odd for such a young child, but those behaviors are alarming.

hominid's avatar

This is something to see a professional about.

this_velvet_glove_again's avatar

I don’t have any children, I used to know one who was like that many years ago, when I was 4 as well.

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

@this_velvet_glove_again Oh god, you sent chills up and down my spine. That’s a psycho waiting to graduate to serial killer.

longgone's avatar

I’m glad we’re not talking about your kid.

I wonder how the kid was treated by her care-takers. Very often, abusers have been abused themselves. An aggressive, hostile parenting style is an excellent way to produce aggressive, hostile children.

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

Do you know what happened with that child? What did they become as an adult?

Cruiser's avatar

I would wonder how a 4 year old could be nimble enough to catch birds.

creative1's avatar

Go to your peditrician and tell them this they will set you up with a child psychologist, you may not like the answer they come up with though. Good Luck!

this_velvet_glove_again's avatar

@longgone We went to kindergarten together and I don’t think that the people there harmed her at all, I remember them being all very good to us, I liked them a lot. I don’t know much about her parents but the few times I went to their house, things were fine. Well, it was actually just her mother that I met. The father wasn’t there and when I was older I found he had left the mother for someone with the same name as his daughter, isn’t that sick?

@Adirondackwannabe She is still kinda crazy but looks happier. I don’t know her well enough to know many details, just that she’s into music and writing poetry. And she’s quite intelligent. You’d think she’s 20something if you talked to her but she’s just 16 like me. I don’t think she has killed anyone. I know she’s been bullied at school, I wouldn’t be surprised if I heard that she strangled those girls. I would congratulate her, in that case.

@Cruiser The birds were in cages.

longgone's avatar

“The few times I went to their house, things were fine.”
They might have been, but then again:

1) Who knows what was happening behind closed doors.
2) You were four.

CWOTUS's avatar

I would suspect that the child is being severely abused to behave like that at that age. What I would do – now – would depend on the circumstances, I guess. I’d certainly try to get the child the help it needed in one way or another.

this_velvet_glove_again's avatar

@longgone 1. Of course I don’t know that.. 2. I know, but I always had this feeling that the mom was okay.

longgone's avatar

Just re-read my post…I apologize, didn’t mean to sound condescending!

ibstubro's avatar

If I had a child like that I would seek therapy for both of us.

Your homework assignment for the weekend is to watch the movie, “The Bad Seed” and write us a one paragraph review.

GloPro's avatar

Why has this memory popped up for you again? Did you watch her toture birds, babies and dolls? Is this in any way related to the abusive boyfriend you are working up the muster to dump?

ninjacolin's avatar

So, how is that kid-turned-adult now, @this_velvet_glove_again? Has he/she murdered a bunch of people or just a couple?

dappled_leaves's avatar

@ibstubro Or to read The Wasp Factory.

AshLeigh's avatar

As a young child, I didn’t have friends, was mean to other kids, and liked to kill my dolls. I never hurt an animal (and don’t think I would ever be able to do that). That being said: I’ve never killed anyone.

On the other hand, within the last month two people I went to school with have been arrested for murder. The girl seemed normal enough. Very shy, and very intelligent. Turns out that she was part of a cult, and killed 21 people.
The boy wasn’t actually very surprising to me. He was very quiet, and always looked angry.

I guess what I’m getting at is that it could go either way.

Judi's avatar

Some kids are really dark. If it were my child I would get her counseling.

Jonesn4burgers's avatar

I understand that schizophrenia can first be diagnosed in people at the age of two. One does not HAVE to have help reaching mental illness. Lots of cases just happen. There are functions in the brain which help humans learn, process, accept, and apply. Some people are damaged, and don’t follow the same growth and changes as most. Small children can be cruel, without comprehending their cruelty. The mechanism within us which makes us responsive to the needs of others can take until puberty to mature.
She should be seen by doctors to determine whether she can be helped with medications or therapy. It is possible she developed those internal mechanisms, and no longer follows such dark actions.

non_omnis_moriar's avatar

I’d be really worried and I’d definitely consult a child psychologist.

Seek's avatar

Hm. I’ve got two out of three.

I was never mean to animals, but I was violent to other kids (not babies, though), and beheaded every Barbie doll I ever owned. Used to sneak bottle rockets out of my grandpa’s stash to blow up army men, too. And burned bugs and stuff with magnifying glasses and things like that.

Sounds to me like a side effect of living in a high stress environment with not enough positive attention. The parents and the child should have counselling.

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