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Hypocrisy_Central's avatar

Have you started to ask a question then stopped midstream and abandoned it, figuring you would not get any useful answers?

Asked by Hypocrisy_Central (26783points) June 17th, 2014

Have you ever abandoned a question you were going to ask because you realized who your audience was and what the majority of the responses would be unhelpful, so why ask? That is, unless you just wanted to verify your suspicions or will a bet.

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62 Answers

talljasperman's avatar

I changed my question about female sumo wrestlers when I googled it and found my answer.

Berserker's avatar

I have. Sometimes I’d like to start discussions about ghosts and other paranormal things, but I just know that ’‘ghosts don’t exist’’ is the only thing I’ll get as answers.

That is, unless you just wanted to verify your suspicions
I try to avoid discussions about God, because as an atheist, people already have a predisposed opinion of my views and opinions on the subject, and will react to me under that accordance, rather than actually read what I wrote. (this goes for both believers and non believers)
And I’ve done the test. I’ve often spoken in the defense of Christians here, and spoken about Jesus and God as if I believed in them, at least during the discussion. And it isn’t to make fun or mock Christian beliefs, I do this to try and explore the subject with a different angle. However, I am constantly dismissed and ignored. So I can’t even participate in God related discussions, fucks if I’m going to ask a question on God.

That, and things that I think to myself, ’‘well, I could probably just Goggle this’’. Because that’s probably what folks would tell me to do anyway.

Such as, ’‘why are apples waxed?’’. I’m guessing I can easily look that up.

Berserker's avatar


Adirondackwannabe's avatar

@Symbeline How does anyone know ghosts don’t exist?

Berserker's avatar

I don’t know, but I’ve heard this on here like a million times.

chyna's avatar

I believe in ghosts. My grandmother had one at her house.
I don’t ask that many questions because I can’t think of many and when I do, I don’t think they are really interesting.

zenvelo's avatar

I was going to ask a question about asking questions, but figured “why bother?”

Mimishu1995's avatar

I was going to ask a law question but then held back because I found some information for it somewhere on Wikipedia.

Unbroken's avatar

Yeps. Sometimes I did post a question and wished I hadnt. Oh well.

I’m always tempted to want to discuss books I’ve read but without the context if actually reading the book it is difficult even if you pull a single question out of several hundred pages chances are that thread will die.

GloPro's avatar

Sometimes I start to answer a question and then change my mind.

JLeslie's avatar

Many times.

rojo's avatar

Waxed apples don’t exist.

flutherother's avatar

Yes, often.

canidmajor's avatar

I have learned that even in General, even with very specific details, it is rare to get useful answers, so yes, there are many I have started and haven’t asked.

ucme's avatar

No, I ask despite knowing how the Fluther fuck ups may react.
Never let the weaklings think they’ve won, they are born losers after all.

DaphneT's avatar

Every day.

longgone's avatar

Hm…no. I tend to take a chance there. In fact, I’ve often been surprised at the helpfulness of answers to my questions.

Pachy's avatar

Yes, a number of times, usually because while trying to write the details, the question started sounding less interesting than when it was in my head.

DipanshiK's avatar

Yes, it has happened a few times. Sometimes questions can be very specific and there’s a possibility that you might not get many answers.
I do my research online and if I don’t get an appropriate answer I tend to move to fluther.
Sometimes, I prefer to not post any question related to my relationships and family because one can get diverse answers when it comes to interacting with the masses. So I’ve learnt that it’s better to keep personal stuff offline.

Seek's avatar

Sure, lots of times. Happened just a few days ago, actually. I was going to ask some of the non-empathetically-bankrupt jellies to help me give advice to my brother. Then I said “Eh, he won’t listen anyway”, and abandoned the question.

Kardamom's avatar

Quite the opposite. I recently posted a question about Tits and Boobies and was told by the Fluther mods that I could not word my question that way, even though those are the legitimate names for those birds. They said it was too obscene. There was nothing obscene or NSFW in the question, the pictures, the links or the details. I’m not the one with my thoughts in the gutter.

I was also told, and this is a direct quote, “It is not we moderators who determine what is considered obscenity in this case – we have to follow web standards. We can not reinstate your Question title with those words, nor with negative mentions about the moderation.”

There were no negative mentions about moderation, I simply stated that I had to change the question because the moderators told me that it was too obscene, even though the names of the birds are the legitimate names of the birds. How is stating a fact and quoting what the mods said making a negative mention about the mods?

I think that if someone has to edit their question and the mods give them a reason why, it absolutely should be pointed out that the question was altered and why. That isn’t a negative mention of the mods, it’s the truth and the facts being pointed out.

The OP even asked This Question referring to a woman’s breast, and it did not get modded. I wonder why not? Oh, and then there was This One and don’t forget about This Question and This Question or This One or even This One all of which are using the euphemism boobs for women’s breasts. No NSFW labels, no modding, not mention of obscenity.

I hope no one on this site is named Dick or Willy or Mulva, or you might not get to ask a question at all, because your names would be considered obscene.

Kardamom's avatar

Yep, wow.

chyna's avatar

@Kardamom I see that it just happened to you again when you re-wrote your original question about tits and boobies! Wow.

Seek's avatar

It’s only acceptable to talk about tits when they’re attached to a 13 year old girl who’s dressed like a hooker.

Kardamom's avatar

Apparently it’s also OK to discuss why men are attracted to boobs, and why someone’s boobs itch, and why someone’s boobs won’t grow and why young girls want to get boob jobs, but it’s not OK to talk about birds.

Ornithologists beware!

ucme's avatar

My tit radar just beeped & sent me here, alas, the tits be gone…shame.

Seek's avatar

Just changed my avatar.

It’s a pair of great tits, in a bra.

Berserker's avatar


Hypocrisy_Central's avatar

The OP even asked This Question referring to a woman’s breast, and it did not get modded.
I had a better bribe? I understand your frustration, it has happened to me as well. I wondered why a particular question was modded for saying something like ”hookers”, and once for ”whores”, while I can comment and say something akin to swallowing after a blowjob or buggery and fly right through. I think I once got modded for speaking of ’fisting” or something like that. I have often said there doesn’t seem to be an alencompassing constant with what questions fly and which end up in the peat mod never to be seen again.

Seaofclouds's avatar

[Mod says] For clarification of the issue @Kardamom has brought up, @Kardamom‘s question about the birds was sent back only because of the specific title of the question. It had nothing to do with the content of the question.

I’m sorry if this was not enough of an explanation as to why the question was sent back for editing. Per our guidelines under the NSFW questions, the question title must still be “safe for work”. While the question content was not under the NSFW category, the words “tits” and “boobies” still fall into that category. In regards to why there have been other questions in the past that were allowed to stay up with such words, I don’t have a specific answer. The questions you posted links to above are older questions, from 2010 before I was a mod. Also, there are things that get by us sometimes. That is why we ask users to flag stuff to bring it to our attention.

Once again, while I understand it is not a NSFW question, filtering software does not recognize content, only the words. This is why Fluther wants the actual question titles to be safe for work. The question details may contain the words, just not the title.

This answer is also posted on the other question as well so it does not get missed for those not involved in both questions.

Kardamom's avatar

So basically, if you ask a question that is not subject to NSFW, but contains a few words such as tits and boobies, which are legitimate words, which refer to birds (not female human breasts) you are subjected to censorship, even if the words in question are not obscene, but if you happened to have written a Q that pre-dates Auggie’s leaving that’s OK, even if they talked about actual female breasts???

Why is that OK??? It just makes the current mods sound incompetent and lazy.

Seaofclouds's avatar

@Kardamom The questions from 2010 predated my becoming a mod, so I don’t know if there was a discussion about leaving them up or how things were being handled. It is not about them pre-dating Auggie’s leave because there have been things she has pulled for the same reason. There have even been discussions about the NSFW terms and the fact that titles must be safe for work in the past (here is one). Your question is not the first question to have been sent back to editing because of having terms that are NSFW even thought the question itself was SFW. I am trying to do some research now in regards to how things were handled in the past, before I was a mod, in regards to the NSFW content. The moderation was done based on what Auggie taught our current mod team. Once again, what is considered SFW and NSFW is based on content that would be filtered on work computers that have filtering software and only relates to the titles, not the content.

Kardamom's avatar

All I know is that my words, in my Q, are not obscene. Those words are tits and boobies and they refer to legitimate, real definitions of birds. Anyone mod or otherwise, who can’t figure that out is just being lazy or ignorant.

And if you want to be consistent and credible, then you need to go back and check all of the potentially “naughty” words and mod those Q’s too, otherwise all of you mods look like lazy hypocrites.

Seaofclouds's avatar

@Kardamom Filters do not take content into account. I have seen filters that have taken all instances of “tit” to be equal to “breast”, including ones referring to the birds. It is not about anyone being too lazy to figure it out. It is about keeping the main page of Fluther (which lists the questions) SFW.

In regards to going back an modding old questions, that is not something we have ever done. The guidelines of Fluther changed over time, especially in the first few years. It was decided back then that the stuff that was in place before those changes would remain up (per my mod training with Auggie). I’m sorry if that makes up look like lazy hypocrites. If we were to go back and mod all the old content, from when Fluther first started, that does not meet the current guidelines, we would be removing a lot of content that played an integral part of making Fluther what it is today. Questions like the Frizzer question would be gone.

Seek's avatar

Since it’s not getting any play over there so far:

would a moderator like to answer this relevant sub-query?

Seaofclouds's avatar

@Seek I just answered. I’m the only mod online right now and I’m also in the midst of doing some school work. Sorry it took me some time to respond to you.

Kardamom's avatar

Sorry, but since you decided to take on the task of being a mod, yes that does make you ignorant and lazy. That’s what your job is, to moderate, with cause, legitimately and fairly, even if it means work on your part to mod fairly, even if you weren’t here when the “offences” were committed. It also means that you owe an explanation to all of the Jellies when you deem something obscene in one innocent post, and not in regards to a handful of other posts (whether they predate your tenure as mod of not) as obscene. Either take your job seriously, or quit.

funkdaddy's avatar

I stopped from asking several questions with regards to my daughter because I didn’t want it to become all about the fact that I’m raising a little girl instead of a sexless childbeast who should be treated like all other childbeasts.

@Seaofclouds – what are we paying you guys for if you’re not available to answer when internet injustice runs rampant?

@kardamom – fluther made a decision that they didn’t want to show up in google for “boobies and tits”... so they made a rule those words couldn’t appear in titles… it’s not personal by google, not personal by fluther, and not personal by any of the mods… what would you like to happen?

Seaofclouds's avatar

@Kardamom I do take my job as a mod seriously. This is not about me not wanting to take up things that were before my tenure. The not going back to mod old posts is in regards to the guideline changes that have occurred on the site over time was decided before my time. It was decided that posts would be grandfathered in and not modded to meet the new standards since they were allowed prior to the guideline changes. As I said above, doing so would remove a lot of the original content (because the guidelines weren’t the same back then). This means the current mod team is not suppose to go back and remove that content.

In regards to saying I owe an explanation to all of the Jellies, I believe that is what I am trying to do right now. The explanation for sending your question back because the title contained “tit” and “boobie” is that the title must be SFW and those terms are not considered SFW. It is part of the guidelines (which I posted above).

I’m sorry that you are upset that things have been grandfathered in as the guidelines have changed, but that was not something I, or any of the other current mods, had a say in. That was what was handed on to us when we became mods. It was the decision of the founders and the community manager for past questions to be grandfathered in when the guidelines changed.

What can we do to move on from this instance? What would you have the mod team do?

Berserker's avatar

@funkdaddy Mods don’t get paid.

funkdaddy's avatar

@Symbeline – I know, they take time away from studies, families, and sometimes paying work to keep spam out of fluther and keep people as happy as possible. Usually it works, occasionally no one is around, and sometimes they do things differently than I would, you know, if I were king…

canidmajor's avatar

I think the patience of @Seaofclouds here is to be commended, especially after being called “ignorant and lazy”. Unless @Kardamom is so ignorant herself as to border on dysfunctional, she worded that Q deliberately for reaction. Probably playfully, I’m sure, but to carry on so is silly. If the concern was merely ornithological, why not mention corvids and finches and stuff?
This attack on @Seaofclouds and the site guidelines in general seems to me to be bizarre and uncalled for.

rojo's avatar

Sometimes. I find I also do it with answers quite frequently.

Hypocrisy_Central's avatar

[…would a moderator like to answer this relevant sub-query?
They forgot ”twins”, ”hub caps”, ”pillows”, ”points”, and “headlights” on that list.

@canidmajor I think the patience of @Seaofclouds here is to be commended, especially after being called “ignorant and lazy”.
That is what people do here, when all else fails bring out the mustard gas, and cluster bombs and hurl insults, digs, and cut, why play under Marcus of Queensberry rules? ~~~

Berserker's avatar


Berserker's avatar


Hypocrisy_Central's avatar

^^ I will never ban your “pillows”, and try not to gaze at them too longingly.

Blondesjon's avatar

I only ask for that very reason.

zenzen's avatar

I occasionally will a bet.

Seaofclouds's avatar

[Mod says] The mod team, with input from Ben and Auggie, have come to the following conclusion regarding the SFW question titles:

Should we allow the correct anatomical terms (penis, breasts, vagina)?
Yes (assuming the rest of the question is not inappropriate). This is the preferred terminology rather than euphemisms.

Should words that have multiple meanings be based on the context, such as tits (the bird)?
Only if the non-vulgar context is made clear. (No: Are these tits? Yes: Why are the migration patterns of adult, white-feathered tits east instead of south?). This is the advantage of allowing a mod to interpret context. So I (Ben) say allowed, but must be made clear to be non-vulgar. We will be using context clues from the title, the details, and the topics.

Should proper names, like Dick Cheney, be allowed?

Questions that may/do contain NSFW content will still require the NSFW tag as well and the question title must be SFW.

We hope this clears up any confusion in regards to the recent events. If anyone has any questions, please let us know.

Hypocrisy_Central's avatar

In case no one else says so; “thank you for taking the time to post that”, even when you may not have had to. :-D

Aethelwine's avatar

All the time lately. There are a handful of people who take any opportunity to tell me how much of an awful person they think I am, so I don’t ask these days. I know who I will get helpful answers from and I’m friends with these users elsewhere, so I’d rather ask for help where I know I’ll get true geniune support.

AshlynM's avatar

To answer the original question, yes.

Hypocrisy_Central's avatar

All the time lately. There are a handful of people who take any opportunity to tell me how much of an awful person they think I am, so I don’t ask these days.
Wait one cotton pick’n minute here. IIs someone out there making rubber masks of me and you are wearing one somehow? That alone might stop one from posting question…… well, maybe not all of us, I will never stop posting! Bahahahaha

Aethelwine's avatar

@Hypocrisy_Central Don’t worry. I believe you have more haters than I do. You win that award. ;)

Hypocrisy_Central's avatar

^ How can you have haters, you are so lovable and nice…

Berserker's avatar

It’s Fluther. Lol.

Katz22's avatar

Yes, that does happen to me. Or I will start to compose a comment back at someone who just commented on an answer I gave, most times I abandon that, because I don’t want to appear as defensive. I am new to this particular site and will tread lightly, until I feel more comfortable. Right now I am not totally comfortable in this water.

Hypocrisy_Central's avatar

^ I am new to this particular site and will tread lightly, until I feel more comfortable.
Go along with the status quo, and do not disagree with them, they will love you.

rojo's avatar

Being a little bitter and cynical aren’t we @Hypocrisy_Central ?

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