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jhellion1031's avatar

Why are some people convinced that their opinion is the only one that matters?

Asked by jhellion1031 (108points) August 31st, 2014

I like a good debate. I love to go back & forth on a subject with someone who has a different opinion than my own. More & more I am running into people who think there is no debate…about anything. That their beliefs are some how beyond reproach? Why are people so closed off to opinions other than their own?

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22 Answers

gailcalled's avatar

<==Milo here; Because it is. I am always right. I always have been. It’s a law of nature. (Neil degrasse Tyson agrees with me. I write all his speeches and feed him his lines through an ear piece during public debates.Now, Gail, she can’t debate her way out of a paper bag.)

Pachy's avatar

Such people suffer from extreme egotism, which is talking and thinking about oneself excessively because of an undue sense of self-importance.

Coloma's avatar

Yes, ego and often insecurity as well. Being shown to be “wrong” is equated with intense feelings of defensiveness as if being wrong means ones entire being is wrong. In other words, having to concede feels like an admission of complete incompetency.

dxs's avatar

Oh my god. I just walked out on a job because of a coworker like this. She had so much egoism that you couldn’t even begin to express your disagreement with her. I got a sense that when someone disagreed with her, she felt like she was “strong” for sticking up for herself. I’d be working, and instead of constructively criticizing me, she’d just say “NO! You’re doing it wrong!” and butt into what I’m doing and finish it. Hell, she wouldn’t even think twice to yell at me and scold me even when customers were present. Needless to say I was bothered by it, so I would tell her to explain to me what I did wrong or request that she not yell because I felt it was inappropriate. Obviously this didn’t work with her personality. This led to her yelling at me because I was always sassing her. Sometimes, she wouldn’t even say anything, just totally interrupt what I was doing and finish the task.
Because of our clashing, I wished to discuss it with her. She said there wasn’t anything to discuss. I started explaining my opinion anyway, and she started yelling over me, not even giving me a chance to have a civilized discussion about it. In fact, whenEVER I tried to say anything back to her she’d do that. She must’ve loved hearing herself.
This is how she explained it, using her accent (overheard by her slandering me to another coworker): “I don’t sugarcoat nothin’ I explain things the way dey iz and if dey can’t handle it then [that’s their problem].”
What the hell kind of assbackwards, egotistic pride is this?!

SQUEEKY2's avatar

As the other have said , ego, and insecurity they just don’t want to hear anything that challenges their views or beliefs in any way shape or form, I fall into it from time to time as well I think most of us do.
The trick is to listen to others point of view as well, and don’t try to convert them to yours.

Coloma's avatar

@dxs That’s awful! What a witch, I’d have walked out too. Ignorant control freaks are the worst!

jerv's avatar

I can be that way myself, though I try not to be. If I feel my opinion is heard and considered, I usually don’t care much if others agree so long as I don’t consider their opinions actually dangerous. So I can respect those that prefer muscle cars over sport compacts, or iOS over Android, but still have difficulty with hardcore conservatives.
My main thing is whether I consider opinions other than my own to be fact-based and well thought out. I actually prefer reasonable dissent over blind agreement, as I feel that the important part is whether one uses their brain when constructing their opinion rather than the opinion itself.

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

Ego and arrogance come to mind. Or, in the words of Frank Burns: “How can we truly be free if we don’t blindly follow our leaders”.

KNOWITALL's avatar

NO one likes to be wrong but Making anyone feel stupid with malice is not mature or classy. It’s HOW you do it.

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

So there’s mature classy ways to make someone look stupid? ~

KNOWITALL's avatar

@Adirondack Right. You have never railed on me for being a theist & I know you believe differently. Diversity is good.

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

@KNOWITALL I would never do that to you. We have different viewpoints, but we are great friends. I trust you totally.

KNOWITALL's avatar

@Adirondack Same here & when we discussed it you didn’t demean. Many people don’t care enough to be thoughtful.

SecondHandStoke's avatar

Your opinion matters to me.Everyone’s opinion matters. That doesn’t mean you’re right.

jca's avatar

If I say I like purple and you say you like blue and purple is stupid, that’s your opinion, but I’m not going to defend myself or argue with you. My opinion is my opinion and your opinion is your opinion. Not everything needs to be argued about or agreed upon.

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

Because I am always 1000 percent right. Yeah pffft

jhellion1031's avatar

Nope, it doesn’t. I’m just not the type to hold my opinions in a higher regard than others. I’ve also started to see that right and wrong are usually relative.

cheebdragon's avatar

What’s the point of always being worried about the opinion of others?

dxs's avatar

^^Are you my ex-coworker?

jhellion1031's avatar

If not for our opinions what are we?

mazingerz88's avatar

One hundred-! One hundred opinions-! HA HA HA-!

One-! One opinion that matters-! Mine-! HA HA HA-!

To the OP, maybe the reason sometimes when one refuses to listen or accept other opinions, is, that person just doesn’t know how to debate. It seems most people don’t know how and many get too emotional.

A person could have the better position on an issue but incapable of explaining or defending it effectively as oppose to someone who possesses arguing skills.

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