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ZEPHYRA's avatar

Have you ever simply chickened out of something due to having been consumed by fear and anxiety?

Asked by ZEPHYRA (21639points) September 17th, 2014

Have you ever just thought, ” no way, I’d better leave now before I make a mess or die of anxiety”. Was it something important? Today I backed out of a new part-time job. It was the third day and the environment and particularly one important member of staff made me paralyze in anxiety. So, I just ended the day and walked out! Has that ever happened to you in any aspect of your life?

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22 Answers

SQUEEKY2's avatar

I stayed with a job, that was the fucking pits for years because of this, when I finally did get the courage to finally leave it was heaven and landed the best job I ever had.

ZEPHYRA's avatar

@SQUEEKY2 guess it had to do with corrrect timing.

Earthbound_Misfit's avatar

No, I don’t think I have. I’ve had anxiety but by the sound of it, mine was minimal compared to you. Are you getting counselling or help to deal with your anxiety? It sounds very severe.

I’m sorry this has happened to you and that you felt you had to leave the job.

Coloma's avatar

No. Fear and anxiety aren’t an issue for me generally speaking.
I’m more likely to chicken out because something is going to require more effort than I wish to expend. Now this has nothing to do with my general kick a$$ approach to many things, but, I know myself well and between knowing what I like, want and am capable of and getting a little older now, I just don’t care to challenge myself that much anymore. It’s all pretty much a “been there, done that” deal by now.

The only thing causing me fear and anxiety these days is my financial future and the thought of having to sit next to my ex husband at my daughters wedding someday.
Maybe he will die first. lol

Dutchess_III's avatar

Doesn’t sound severe to me. A bad work environment can be a freaking nightmare. I had a job for a few months once and one of the senior women was so horrid and mean, I would come home from work and just cry.

Dutchess_III's avatar

Oh, yeah. Just remembered. We were visiting my daughter in another town, about 14 miles away on labor day. Severe weather was moving in. We wanted to leave and the guys were saying if we hurried it looked like we’d have a clear corridor between two storms that were moving in from different directions. One from the south and one from the west. Decided to go for it.
Came around a corner in town, thought we heard sirens. We listened a moment and realized it was the humming of a generator plant thingy next to us but it spooked me a little. I looked at the clouds we were getting ready to run into…and I said, “GO BACK!” It was just like the Amityville horror.
We went back and sat on their covered patio and watched the show. It was awesome.

Earthbound_Misfit's avatar

She didn’t say it was a bad work environment @Dutchess_III. She said she was paralysed by fear because of the environment and a member of staff. That could mean it was noisy and her boss was very specific about how he wants things done.

janbb's avatar

Yes – I left a job as a stringer when they put me on a word processor without showing me how to use it. This was back in the 80s.

And I didn’t go on a walk tonight because a friend who broke up with me was signed up and it makes me too anxious to contemplate being there with him.

Dutchess_III's avatar

Yes she did, @Earthbound_Misfit. ”...and the environment and particularly one important member of staff made me paralyze in anxiety.” One member of the staff can poison the whole environment.

So, what was that staff member like? What did she do?

Earthbound_Misfit's avatar

Her statement doesn’t mean the environment was bad or toxic. It could just be her reaction to the environment.

Yes, some work situations are terrible and some colleagues can make life hell, but there’s nothing in her post to say that’s happening here. We don’t know what it is in the environment or with that person that is making her anxious.

ucme's avatar

When I stumbled across Honey Boo Boo on the tellybox, I wanted so badly to kick the fucking screen in, but the football was on that night & I had beers in & everything, wimped out.

Dutchess_III's avatar

@ZEPHYRA, can we get some more details.

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

Yes, I have the urge to chicken out on something tomorrow, but I can’t.

Haleth's avatar

I wanted to get a tattoo of the pulsar map from the Pioneer Plaque on my inner forearm.

But, like, you know how some people have phobias of spiders or heights or whatever? That’s how I feel about needles. The last time I got a flu shot I nearly heaved. Even the sound of someone putting on a latex glove gives me the cold sweats.

So no, I did not succeed in getting a tattoo that day.

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

Hey if anyone knows what I’m trying to avoid and sends me a pm, I’ll send them a special gift.

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

Hittin the hay, we have a winner.

ZEPHYRA's avatar

People in there just made announcements with no explanations and expected you to know what was going on. There were constant changes in their schedules and that woman spoke abruptly without even looking at you. There were unclear terms and nobody seemed willing to clarify anything. I don’t consider myself a person who doesn’t want to try and fight back in life, but I could not handle that hostile attitude! As for anxiety, I do take medication but it doesn’t seem to do much!

Earthbound_Misfit's avatar

@ZEPHYRA is this the job you just started this week though? The one you asked about before you actually started working there? Sometimes it takes a while to get used to how a place works. I know I usually feel out-of-place in a new workplace for a few days and sometimes longer. I’m sorry it didn’t work out.

ZEPHYRA's avatar

@Earthbound_Misfit Yes, that’s it. I guess I should have stuck with it and stared my anxiety in the face but I had to prepare myself psychologically hours before going and the whole thing drove everyone at home mad. So, I saved myself from more woes. Thanks anyway.

Earthbound_Misfit's avatar

Just try to learn from the experience. Then you can prepare for feeling this way next time you get a job.

In my current job, I arrived and there was nobody to meet me. I had to go and find the head person’s secretary and ask ‘where is my office?’ Nobody told me what I was required to do. Most people were on leave because it was early in the new year. I just went to my office, set myself up and started meeting the staff I would need to supervise. It was very uncomfortable and I feel it was also disrespectful. I’ve been there a long time now and I was used to the way things work within a few months. It sometimes takes time to start to feel comfortable and if I get anxious, I try to break it into smaller chunks and debrief by talking to someone I trust.

Whatever works for you, have a plan for next time. You deserve to be able to progress with your life and find a fabulous job. Don’t waste energy feeling guilty or bad about this experience. Just make it productive and learn from it.

ItalianPrincess1217's avatar

All the time. I’ve made plans to attend a party and worked myself up to the point of backing out last minute. I’ve walked out of a job because it made me so anxious to be there. I’ve even made Doctor appointments at a new office and canceled because I was too anxious to go to a place I’ve never been before. Pretty ridiculous sounding, I know. It’s improved. But I have my moments every so often.

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