Social Question

dopeguru's avatar

Is there ever a way to know if a guy wants more than sex?

Asked by dopeguru (1917points) November 16th, 2014

How can I know if he just wants sex or a relationship? Any guy could lie when asked so just ask him isn’t a good answer.

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15 Answers

elbanditoroso's avatar

“a guy could lie!” – that’s one hell of an attitude. You know what? Women lie too. It’s not exclusively a male thing.

My answer to your question: if you’re close enough to him (that is, intimate enough) then you ought to be in a position to ask him directly. And if you can’t, why the heck are you having sex with him?

Sounds to me like you’re prepared to think he is lying no matter what.

talljasperman's avatar

He could want food too.

canidmajor's avatar

If he initiates activities with you that don’t involve having sex is a good indicator.
You’re questions would indicate that you’re at an age when a lot of guys really do push for sex-without-attachment, so I don’t find your question silly, as apparently some others do.
No, @elbanditoroso, that’s not necessarily sexist, teen-aged boys often are so focused on the “prize” because of hormonal urges and peer pressure that many don’t really look past that. And young women don’t have the life experience to judge well what their intentions are.

kritiper's avatar

First things first: he wants sex! If he wants more, he’ll tell you when the time is right!

SQUEEKY2's avatar

@canidmajor AS I took it, @elbanditoroso didn’t find the question silly more a bit offensive as to only guys lie about sex .
Women can lie just as well,but you right most teenage boys only think with their small head, and girls should be aware of that and always be prepared to play safe,that is if they want to play at all.

Dutchess_III's avatar

In my teenage experience guys will lie their heads off to get some! I mean, they will say almost anything. I don’t think a woman or girl needs to lie about anything to get laid. All they have to say is that they’re up for it.

If you have sex with him, and then he leaves and comes back 3 days later for more, and hasn’t spoken to you in the meantime, then all he wants is sex.

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

@dopeguru I will lie, stand, or sit for sex. Just name it. Okay, I was a bit rough on you last night. Let me see if I can make it up to you. If the guy is pressuring you, and you’re not sure if you’re ready, and he keeps pushing, that is all he cares about. When the guy backs off and lets you decide when you’re ready, he cares about you and sex isn’t all he’s after. If a guy really cares, he’s going to want you to want it as much as he does.

SQUEEKY2's avatar

SUPER GREAT ANSWER @Adirondackwannabe !

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

@SQUEEKY2 Careful, I might get cocky. But I owed her a bit for my sarcastic answer last night.

Coloma's avatar

@Adirondackwannabe This is a public forum, put your cock away. lolol

jca's avatar

It should be more than just you visiting him and having sex or him visiting you and having sex. It should be getting to know each other, going out, going places, hanging out, talking in person or phone, him showing an interest in you and your interests (and vice versa, of course).

Hypocrisy_Central's avatar

If you want to k now if he is interested in more than just sex, don’t boink him for 6 weeks and see if he is still around, and if he is, if he is whining, bitching, and sniveling. If he is still there and content, maybe he is there for more than sex.

gorillapaws's avatar

If you’re not sure don’t sleep with him. The longer you make him wait, the more likely he’s not just in it for the sex. Unless of course you’re just in it for the sex (which is fine) and then do whatever floats your boat.

RealEyesRealizeRealLies's avatar

I suggest concentrating on what YOU want more or less of, and letting him know about it.

Doing so is the fastest way to discover what HE truthfully wants more or less of.

Buttonstc's avatar

It’s really simple. Stop being an easy lay. Translation: don’t have sex with him.

Tell him that you aren’t ready for that yet and want to develop a relationship first.

If he sticks around, then he obviously sees more in you than just a place to dump his sperm.

I know that’s kind of radical advice in this day and age of people hopping into bed together after the first date or two, but if you REALLY want to know if a guy is interested in you for more than sex, keep sex out of the equation. Period. Let the relationship develop some depth and commitment before getting between the sheets.

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