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writingmylifeaway's avatar

Parents, would you be mad with your child getting a 'B' in school?

Asked by writingmylifeaway (32points) December 25th, 2014

Hi, I got a grade “B” for maths and English for this semester, and my parents are really upset. I don’t understand why my teacher gave me a B for English, as she mainly based this grade on a piece we had to do that included: report, narrative, diagram, poem and facts, and the invention had to be unique. We had free choice of anything invented in the 21st century. Most of the class, around 25 of 30 students, did a version of iPhone. I did Toyota’s hybrid car, 2 of the boys did an airplane (not sure which one), my friend did the artificial heart, and someone did a vacuum cleaner. She gave the grades as follows: me – A, my friend – A, vacuum – B, plane – A and B iPhone – from A to A++. Why? Does anyone know?
On maths, I had sprained my foot just below the ankle and it got swollen, I couldn’t walk properly for a week. I missed out on crucial work, which meant a lot of errors in my test, and the teacher, even though she knew why I didn’t learn it, didn’t let me retake the test, after I said I had spent the few nights learning the topics. My parents are so angry I got a B! What to do?

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8 Answers

janbb's avatar

It sounds like your parents need to adjust their expectations of you. Sometimes people do get “Bs.” Can you talk to the English teacher to find out why you got that grade? Other than that, I think you all just have to adjust your expectations to the circumstances in life.

jerv's avatar

The problem is with them, not you. If their expectations are that high, then they may need therapy. Possibly medication. At the very least find some way (or someone) to teach them some coping skills.

dappled_leaves's avatar

You seem to be asking two questions here: (1) Why did I get low grades in these classes? and (2) How do I deal with my parents’ reaction?

Regarding the first point, even if you were to give us enough details about your projects and how you completed the assignments, we could not tell you whether your grade was appropriate. This is something you need to ask your teachers directly. If you think you were graded unfairly, then ask them why you received the grade you did, given the circumstances. If they seem supportive, you may want to ask them to re-evaluate your work. However, “I was on crutches, so I couldn’t do math” is not likely to gain sympathy. Be careful to explain your circumstances, rather than provide excuses. Everyone can look back and find excuses for poor performance.

The reality is that if your schoolwork is a high priority for you, you would overcome any obstacles to put in the required amount of effort to get a high grade. Your teachers know this, and they are accustomed to students giving excuses for poor performance. Don’t be one of those students.

If you think the grade was justified, and you are genuinely interested in keeping your grades up, then I would suggest visiting your teachers to ask how you could have done better on these assignments. Tell them about your study habits, and ask them for pointers. Even if they can’t help you much, they will see that you are a keen student who cares about his or her grades.

Once you’ve done this, tell your parents what you learned in these meetings. They will probably be impressed that you took the initiative. It isn’t fair that they’re “angry” at you for your grades; it is too bad for you that this is your reaction. But since you are already motivated to get better grades in future, at least you all share the same goals. And as you work harder to improve your grades, they will be more content. One hopes. Good luck!

JLeslie's avatar

No. Not if they had tried their best. Even if they hadn’t tried their best I wouldn’t be angry.

Earthbound_Misfit's avatar

No, I would not be mad with my child for getting a B.

I am more concerned with the effort they put into their work. If they applied themselves to the task, I don’t feel getting angry because they didn’t get an A is fair. Some children are never going to be A-grade students. Their level of ability may be C-grade, but if they’ve worked hard for that C. and learned from the task, that should be rewarded not condemned.

Marking, even if the teacher uses marking criteria, is subjective. While as you move away from high school, it’s likely marking will go through a moderation process, there are still variances across markers.

I regularly tell my students not to obsess about the grade. I really want them to focus on the learning experience. Unless it’s a final exam/assignment that determines whether you pass or fail and so get a qualification, the learning experience is far more important than a letter in the corner of the page.

writingmylifeaway's avatar

Two things I forgot to ad:
1)I finished the English project two weeks before the due date (not bragging, just wanna add all detail)
2) The year’s finished, I can’t talk to that teacher.

ibstubro's avatar

I defer to the @dappled_leaves excellent and informed answer.

Dutchess_III's avatar

Anything below a D and the kid was grounded!

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