What have you learned about relationships in your life? (a revived question)

I think it’s a very broad question. I think they are necessary and unavoidable. But my relationship with this phone or the weather or my relationship with this phone in regard to the weather? What IS the question?

It was interesting to look back at this old question. I answered it then reflecting only on purely romantic relationships. When I read this question today, that honestly didn’t occur to me. I saw it much more broadly.

I learned one important thing about relationships in 2015: I must love myself first before attempting to form any type of relationship. It is only from this basis that I can completely engage with others. When I reach out to others without completely loving myself, I always want something in return. With a basis of complete self-love, I can be fully open and present for others. This is true in my personal and professional lives.

It is important to me that I saw this question in broad terms today. It reflects on my amount of self-love and self-acceptance. Since I have those two items now, I don’t feel the need to be drawn into relationships that are less than whole. I can also protect myself from others with motives that are not based in high integrity.

I’ve learned that even though I have extreme anxiety when I have to do anything regarding my family they are always open and welcoming to me when I see them. And after all these years I am beginning to accept that the only way my father will ever show me he loves me is by buying me things, whether I like them or not. It is all I will ever get.

Never take anyone for granted. ANYONE.

The truth hurts. But I am willing to be the one people blame for telling that truth, because even if it takes days or years, I usually receive a sorry and a thank you. Some things need to be said.

Trust no one.

When all’s said & done & all avenues explored, it really comes down to one absolute, i’m a fantastic catch!

Don’t count on anyone being in your life for the long haul.

I’ve learned that life can totally change in a matter of moments. And does. There are a lot things that you can successfully handle from any fallout, afterwards.

It’s all mind over matter- if you don’t mind, it doesn’t really matter.

@janbb :(

@tinyfaery Yeah, I know but some get lucky. And also, there are many wonderful people that might be in your life for a while. Didn’t mean it to sound as much of a downer as it did.

What’s between two people (any two people) never looks the same to anybody outside the pair as it does to the two in it.

It probably doesn’t even look the same to each of the two.

That romantic relationships require work, they don’t happen by themselves.

Don’t harbour hopes that someone will change, or that you will change them, if you can’t accept the person 100% as they are right now that’s a red light in my book.

People can do bad things with good intentions and good things with bad intentions.

What I mean, if you want elaboration, is that people can hurt us without meaning to or wanting to, it’s just the way it is sometimes.Maybe they want to follow through on promises, but can’t. Maybe they change and are as surprised by their alteration as we are. And on the flip side, people can knowingly lie and be manipulative and when we wise up to this, we become tougher and stronger, as long as we don’t stagnate by becoming bitter. I guess that’s a good thing….

There are a lot of lonely people in the world just hoping that someone will reach out and touch their lives. They are hungry for honesty,, to be seen, and for someone to just get real with them. When they find a person who will do that, be that real thing, it is intoxicating and all too rare. For me, those people are what life is all about.

Being single is way better than being in the wrong relationship. You have to be happy and healthy as a single person before you can have a happy, healthy relationship with another person.

I have learned that most people really don’t understand that “They didn’t hit me” isn’t the Gold Standard for parenting.
We have friends that come and go and are often as important as the ones we have for decades, for different reasons.
There is no social device in place for the loss of a dear friend. Grieving the loss of a best friend is a lonely business. Nobody brings you casseroles.

Without human relationships, no matter how sporadic, life would not be worth living.

1. I have learned that very few relationships last “forever.” Forever is a long time and the reasons and seasons of our lives ebb and flow as do our relationships.

2. I have learned that you really do find out who your true friends are when the chips are down. Friends of only a few years can often turn out to be more genuine than friends you have known for 20 or 30 years.

3. I have learned that knowing others personality types and the way they roll can really help you when you are annoyed at how others show up. Everyone should study Meyers Briggs and other personality theory for a better understanding of self and others IMO.

4. I have learned we never, really, know anyone as well as we think we do, including ourselves. There are always surprises to be discovered and change is a constant if one is still alive and kicking.

5. I have learned as @Haleth mentions, that being single is far preferable, infact joyful, opposed to being in a non-working relationship and that liking your own company and being content is very important for true happiness. Too many relationship dependent people out there looking for someone else to fill up their empty places.

I like those articles, @Haleth. I wish they’d been somewhere in my vicinity when I was about 22.

It is easier to be in no relationship than to be in a bad relationship.