What is a polite synonym for mental masturbation?
The term is very descriptive of a type of intellectual discussion that does not have any meaning or consequences, but it would be nice to be able to substitute a word or phrase without sexual connotations. What do you think of intellectual Chinese fire drill? Is that an implied ethnic slur?
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I would use either of the following:
“blather”
or
“high level bullshitting”
I see Chinese Fire Drill (which I would consider to be needlessly offensive) as an entirely different phenomenon. A CFD, to me, implies running around physically to do meaningless things with no avail. Mental masturbation, as you call it, isn’t physical, it’s all verbal.
The classic one is “navel-gazing.” If you need something more formal sounding, the technical term for navel-gazing is “omphaloskepsis.”
@SavoirFaire – not sure I agree. I always thought of omphaloskepsis as a solitary thing – letting one’s own mind run rampant.
I see what @LostInParadise asked (emphasis on the word ‘discussion’) as a group level bullshit session.
@elbanditoroso Traditionally, yes. But my entire profession has been described by some outsiders as navel-gazing, so there is precedent for the usage. I suppose that @LostInParadise could always say “collective navel-gazing” to make things perfectly clear.
My problem with navel gazing is that it overemphasizes self-absorption, where what I am thinking of is discussion of grand schemes for describing the universe. It is true that the people involved are self-absorbed, but they imagine that they are actually looking outward in the widest possible way. Wittgenstein’s phrase “bewitchment of thought by language” comes to mind. I love that phrase as a description of the output of the discussions, but it does not work well as a description of the discussions themselves.
Conversational existentialism.
I was part of a group for a while that did this regularly, just to exercise our thought processes.
Every month we would come up with a new “thought exercise” or sometimes a “morality play” just for fun. I never think of it as “bullshit” or “blather” any more than discussing a work of literary fiction in a book club is “bullshit” or “blather” (or “ego-stroking”. How is this “ego stroking?”)
It’s a good way to learn to think in more complex ways.
I think intellectual Chinese Fire Drill is a good description, but might, indeed, carry some stigma. It needs a small, specific audience.
@SavoirFaire omphaloskepsis…Does that a navel-gazer a omphaloskeptic?
bullshit session or philosophical discussion
Wet dream. Wet day-dream.
Wanking in your head? Surely resulting in a pounding headache or earache even.
Contemplating one’s navel.
@LostInParadise Self-absorption was certainly part of the term’s original connotation, but the usage has expanded over time. Maybe that’s not good enough for the context you want to use it in, though.
@Yetanotheruser It does!
@janbb Ouch!
I like palaver too, but it falls short of what I am looking for. Palaver is what you get when the mind runs on idle. It lacks the pretentiousness, complexity and grandiosity that I want to have included.
Palaver has a different meaning in British English. It means a fuss or bother.
I like the simple ‘philosophical discussion’ that @janbb suggested
@Stinley That’s how I interpret palaver too. Like, don’t make a whole palaver about it.
@SavoirFaire I wasn’t seeing my last two suggestions as synonymous; just two separate alternatives.
@janbb stop making a palaver about the meaning of palaver
“Ooh, stop making a palaver over your balaclava!!”
Bank robbers arguing because their disguises don’t fit well.
“Ooh, stop making a palaver over your balaclava and pass the baclava!”
Greek bank robbers arguing.
@Stinley @janbb Does it have a different meaning in British English, or is it just that one of the possible meanings of the word is more common there? A lot of words have more than one meaning, after all.
@janbb I realize that you weren’t using the two suggestions to mean the same thing. I was responding to the suggestion that “philosophical discussion” is a synonym for “mental masturbation” or “a type of intellectual discussion that does not have any meaning or consequences.” I don’t think either is true. Some philosophical discussions may involve palavering, but not all of them do.
@LostInParadise At this point, I think you have too many criteria for a single word to cover everything you want.
I’ve never heard of the “American ” meaning. And when I looked it up it said it was an American meaning. You are all so much more learned than me knowing both definitions!
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