General Question

Android67's avatar

How to deal with a needy friend?

Asked by Android67 (41points) December 28th, 2015

Hullo again. I have a friend who text and e-mail me all the time, I think he has no other friends. I try to be understanding of this situation but he is too needy and I feel suffocated. Everything he does annoys me now. I feel mean but also I hate this feeling.

What would you do?

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7 Answers

zenvelo's avatar

You need to be direct and set a boundary.

Next time he texts, reply with “I am sorry that I do not have time for a conversation. Please do not text me again unless I text you first.”

Then don’t ever text him back again. If he continues to text you, block him.

And, you do not have to reply to emails. If he emails you asking why you are not responding, explain you do not have time to reply.

ARE_you_kidding_me's avatar

Is it really a friend? If all they do is ask you to do things for them it’s not a friendship. If that’s the case then cut the cord.

Love_my_doggie's avatar

If I had a friend who continually suffocated and annoyed me, I’d end the friendship.

jca's avatar

It wasn’t clear to me whether or not you want to continue to be friends with him. Do you want the friendship but with him being less demanding or do you want to be done with him totally?

Tellitasitis's avatar

Is this friend important to you? If yes, accept the fact he’s a bit more needy than usual. If however, there isn’t enough in it for you, end the friendship.

Android67's avatar

He’s a good friend, always there when needed. but my feeling is not mutual. I don’t know if I want to be friends. I don’t enjoy time together even if he hasn’t done anything wrong….. only is very needy

jca's avatar

I have a friend like that. I’ve asked several questions about her on here in the past year. She suffered some trauma and has become a hypochondriac. Not only is she not fun, but she is demanding for me and others to accommodate her neediness. I’m trying to hold on to the friendship because I’m hoping she calms down. Other friends of hers tell me that they feel the same way.

In your case, I don’t see an end in sight.

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