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serenityNOW's avatar

How do you ask someone to lend you money?

Asked by serenityNOW (3636points) February 3rd, 2016

I’m in over my head with bills. I need to borrow some money. I am working, just underemployed right now. My bills are not astronomical, but for the short-term, I’m in need of some cash. I don’t want to come off as a beggar, and I fully intend to pay whoever I choose back as soon as I can. I’m just not sure who to ask, how to ask, when to ask, etc. I’ve never done this before. Sure, I’ve asked the parents to help in the past, but they are strapped, too. I am waiting for a disability claim to go through, so anything on the books for the next couple of weeks will not work pan out till it gets resolved. If it were simply the case of wandering into some retail job and making a quick buck, I’d do it.

Do I ask a bunch of people for small amounts, or just go to one person? Money has always been an awkward talking point in my family, so I don’t really have a clue how someone would react. I feel like I’ll be coming off as some sort of beggar. This is an awful feeling. Help!

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4 Answers

Zaku's avatar

One way that can help: Explain your situation fully and honestly, pause to see how they react, and if they have any interest in helping, make a promise in writing to pay it back by a certain date.

Cruiser's avatar

Start a crowd funding page and plead your case. I know someone who raised over $7,000 because he said he really, really, really wanted to visit Italy.

serenityNOW's avatar

@Cruiser I like the idea of putting it in writing and pausing to let them think it through. I am trying to put myself in someone else’s perspective and how I would react, and I think I would be pretty chill. If I didn’t have the money, I’d say so. I just want to be tactful, meaning I don’‘t want to put anyone off by having it sound like they are obligated to oblige. Also, I’m trying to narrow down **who** I am going to ask. Lots of my friends have little kids, still paying student loans, etc., so they probably have it earmarked. I have a cousin who has always been on my side, cheering me on during some really tough times. Still thinking it over, but she is like a sister to me.

@Zaku Seriously?! That’s an amazing idea. Honestly. Which crowd funding service did he use? I could think of a bunch of reasons, aside from getting rid of my debt. Interesting.

longgone's avatar

My grandma was struggling with her rent a couple of years ago, and no-one in the family was able to just take care of it. So, we came up with an alternative to crowd-sourcing: My sister and I wrote an email to a bunch of her friends, explaining

a) much money we needed every month, and
b) ...that how high an amount people donated would not get disclosed.

This, I think, greatly reduced pressure on potential donors. All of them responded, each had a particular sum in mind, and we were able to easily raise the money we needed. I set up an account in my name, and the money collected on that account, to then get passed on.

Maybe your cousin could get something like that started?

Good luck!

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