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Aster's avatar

A gorgeous woman, needing love, married nine times. Would you call that a full life?

Asked by Aster (19949points) May 12th, 2016

If a woman who was sweet, beautiful and popular married and divorced nine times looking for her true love would you tend to characterize her life as being a full one based only on multiple marriages? Or would you tend to think she was looking for love in the wrong way and probably had a tragic life?

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30 Answers

SQUEEKY2's avatar

I would tend to think of her, as more of a mixed up gold digger.

Darth_Algar's avatar

I’d ask her whether or not she feels that she’s had a full life. Right after, of course, I made my petty judgments about this woman whom I don’t know based only on the thinnest slivers of information.

jca's avatar

Knowing nothing else about her, who am I to judge her?

Aster's avatar

I am not judging her. I was asking if you think her life was full based on nine marriages. It is not out of the question that her life brought her warm moments of joy and many experiences she might not have had with only one or two marriages.

Aster's avatar

@SQUEEKY2 I didn’t say her husbands had a lot of money.

Seek's avatar

I’d think she was a really big fan of paperwork.

Other than that, you can’t really make any determination on the fullness of her life based on the number of times she was married.

jca's avatar

Knowing nothing else about her, who am I to make assumptions about her life?

Coloma's avatar

I think any marriages after a second one are a mockery of the ideal.
I have an ex friend who is now married for the 3rd time and yep, while she has enjoyed being a very beautiful women she is a needy, neurotic mess and could find no joy in life unless she was involved in a relationship at all times. Multiple marriages have nothing to do with fullness of life and everything to do with neurotic dependency on another to somehow make their own lives more worth living. I was married once, and that was more than enough for me.

I can’t fathom marrying 3, 4, 5, 6 times or more. My freaking gawd, just the thought of it all exhausts me. lol

kritiper's avatar

Full? Maybe. Complete? Possibly. Fulfilled? Not so much. Sounds to me like a life-long cluster f—k.

jca's avatar

@Aster: Is this a real woman you are talking about, or a hypothesis?

stanleybmanly's avatar

9 marriages? Full life seems misleading at best. It’s like a realtor listing a closet as a jr. bedroom. While it’s true that someone might sleep in the closet, or that nine successful bank robberies qualifies me as an up and coming “entrepreneur”, “full life” paired with 9 divorces sounds a tad deceptive.

Pandora's avatar

I think it depends on the marriages and it would depend on my definition of what a full life means. To me a full life is full of ups and downs. Changes, in life and in ones growth. If she married 9 times, I’m not sure she has grown. Obviously she keeps repeating the same mistakes. She is impulsive and doesn’t realize that her impulsiveness may have hurt 9 people and maybe more if children were involved.
But then anyone willing to marry someone who has had multiple marriages isn’t blameless. They were looking for a dare and found one.
I knew a guy who was married 5 times. He was the most repulsive person I ever met. This was not a man who could hide his repulsive personalities, so I had to wonder if the women he married did so for another reason. They certainly didn’t marry him for his charm.

Judi's avatar

My first impression based on the information given would be, “how sad.”
My next impression would be curiosity, wanting to know more about how the woman perceived her life. Really, how I see it doesn’t matter at all. If she thought she had a rich and full life then that’s the only opinion that matters.

Jak's avatar

I wouldn’t presume to try to impose my definition of what it means to live a full life on another person, especially based on her number of marriages. They may be, in her eyes, completely incidental to what makes her life a full one. For all I know, each of those marriages allowed as someone into the country as a citizen. She could be a foreign aid worker or a correspondent who just wants to save as many people as she can. I’m not here to judge people for not living their lives on accordance with my standards. Or not explaining their life choices to me. I’ll leave that to the far right and other nosy, “do it my way or suffer!” groups.

ARE_you_kidding_me's avatar

It points to her as being the problem in most or all the relationships.

Cruiser's avatar

Dating and courting a new love can be exciting and exhilarating with plenty of hot fun times. I am on my second marriage and getting married to the person you love is a tremendously great time. But the divorce at least in my case was one of the worst periods of my life. Very traumatizing for me. So unless she was a hump em and dump em gold digger, to go through that 9 times would be exhausting, devastating and take away any of the fun the marriage could have possibly provided. Can’t imagine for the life of me that her life would be anything but tragic and full of regrets.

Aster's avatar

@Cruiser I think you must be right. She eventually gave up marriage and became a “Born Again Christian.” I’m not surprised.

zenvelo's avatar

I would find her life as closer to empty.

There is a void in her life she thinks can fill with a husband, yet voids like that can only be filled from within.

Coloma's avatar

@zenvelo Exactly. I am very wary of anyone that, as an adult, is fearful of standing on their own psychological feet so to speak and seeking some sort of rescue via relationship.

Dutchess_III's avatar

Maybe that’s her idea of fulfillment. Or maybe she just likes going through all the work of changing her last name a lot.
If she’s relying on her beauty to keep it up, though, she’ll soon be in trouble.

dappled_leaves's avatar

It would never occur to me to judge the quality of a woman’s life by the number of times she was married. Was her whole life about the marriages? Was she happily married? Did she have fun? Did she do important work, or work she enjoyed? Did she travel? Did she make other people’s lives better? Did she read many enjoyable books or see all the James Bond movies? Did she paint?

The only thing that matters is what she valued in her life, and whether she felt fulfilled. I kind of hope her answer to that question had nothing to do with whether she got married a lot.

Dutchess_III's avatar

Wait…what does her being “gorgeous” have to do with anything?

Darth_Algar's avatar

Maybe her and her husbands had agreed to only bind themselves to each other for a certain period of time. “Til death do us part” is over-rated.

flutherother's avatar

One fulfilling relationship is better than nine that didn’t work out.

Buttonstc's avatar

Sounds like a slow learner. Those who fail to learn from history are doomed to repeat it.

If it takes nine tries to get it right then you are either a lousy judge of character or you weren’t paying attention.

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Esedess's avatar

Has she never heard of dating?

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