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honeybun35's avatar

Could you help understand my date's reaction?

Asked by honeybun35 (240points) October 16th, 2016

“There’s this guy that I’ve known for 15 years. He comes in and out my life. Just last week we got together for the second time since February. Before that it was over a year. He calls me to tell me he want to make love. Funny, right?

So, while we were together I was updating him about a situation that I had with someone during the time I hadn’t seen him. He said “You’re talking about another guy while you’re on me.” He made me get off and wouldn’t let me touch him.

Later he said he was okay and he just wanted something to eat. He never likes me to leave always want me to stay and cuddle, but I have to leave because of work.

The next day I was supposed to see him he texted me with an excuse and said “Let’s play it by ear.” Ever since then he’s ignored my text and calls.

Any thoughts?

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25 Answers

janbb's avatar

Well, it probably wasn’t the most tactful thing to do.

Darth_Algar's avatar

Yes, absolutely. Nothing turns a person on like yapping about someone else while you’re having sex with them.

Response moderated (Writing Standards)
filmfann's avatar

That’s the reason. He might get over it.

Response moderated (Writing Standards)
chyna's avatar

You killed the moment. He probably isn’t upset that you are having relations with other men, he is upset that you chose to talk about it when you were in the middle of sex with him and it sort of deflated the moment. Truly a classless act on your part.

Response moderated (Writing Standards)
zenvelo's avatar

When you are having sex with someone, it is the heighth of rudeness to bring up somebody else. Doesn’t matter how casual the relationship with the person you are with, that is flat out wrong.

If he ever contacts you again, be prepared to apologize first.

Response moderated (Writing Standards)
Mimishu1995's avatar

@honeybun35 Everyone has pointed out that this was your fault. After that day you didn’t know that and you texted him asking him to go out like nothing happened, and further infuriated him. And now after everyone has explained it to you you still refuse to acknowledge your fault? The fact that you have known him since 2001 doesn’t mean he can’t be angry with you (and really, if you know him for that long you ars supposed to know what he doesn’t like) His quote could be a warning sign for you. Apologize to him when you see him.

And learn to write a more comprehensible sentence. You aren’t a 13-year-old anymore.

Response moderated (Writing Standards)
Seek's avatar

Dude. He was inside you and you were talking about someone else. He doesn’t owe you forgiveness.

stanleybmanly's avatar

SEEK! I don’t believe it!

stanleybmanly's avatar

Give the honeybun a break guys. She may not be the queen of romance, but if this is the same dude from her other posts, there are some serious blips in this relationship.

Darth_Algar's avatar

Holy thread necromancy Batman!

Response moderated (Writing Standards)
Dutchess_lll's avatar

Well just wow.

Inspired_2write's avatar

As above you and him are over. After 15 years on and off, get the hint its not working.
Find another more fulfilling and not temporary in and out of your life.

honeybun35's avatar

Well if you have read you’ll see we have been friends 18 yrs but in between we lost contact and I got married then we reconnected

stanleybmanly's avatar

I’m inclined to agree with inspired. If you are merely tolerating sex as a remedy for loneliness, you must assess the relationship for what it is.

kritiper's avatar

He doesn’t really know what he wants, but he thinks he’s special, like he is God’s gift to women. He wants it to be all about him but he probably thinks that way about all women, not just you. Don’t let his hangs up be yours.

stanleybmanly's avatar

Can anyone explain the apparition of Seek? Should we be frightened? I mean her kid must be in high school now. I wanna know more!

zenvelo's avatar

@stanleybmanly He’s not yet a teenager. This thread is three years old, @Seek’s posting is old. I met her and her son and her husband for lunch in San Francisco last month, they are doing well.

stanleybmanly's avatar

RDG pm’d me the time travel explanation. Thanks for telling me. I was quite startled.

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