Can we hear the "nightmare" Christmas tree stories? Misery loves company.

Asked by stanleybmanly (24153) December 10th, 2016 from iPhone

The wife has been flirting with the idea of an artificial tree for years. Well this year she actually researched them dillegently, picked a company rated “best” for quality and “realism” of product and with a girlfriend drove down to Burlingame for on the spot reconnaissance. The girlfriend picked a small one ($350) for herself, and they came back bubbling. Now the thing I want to state at the outset is that once the wife is committed to a project, she is indomitable. I know the signs, and once the research, footwork and reconnoiter are in place, her position is rock hard and unassailable. A fake tree was in our immediate future, end of story. Bright and early the next morning (Sunday) we were off to achieve the ceremonial necessity of my inspection and approval of her choice. And I can tell you, brothers and sisters, that the fake tree was indeed beautiful. Yet standing there awed by its magnificence, my miserly inclinations gnawed agonizingly “there is nothing you could do to this thing that would render it worthy of the $800 sticker price”. In fairness, the wife herself was brutally aware of the extravagance involved with the price of a thing made in China probably at a cost of less than 20 bucks. But she (we) were now committed and it was “game on”. The debit card came out, and it was back home to await the shipment of our wonder from Colorado, since the floor model was the only one in stock and lacked the “deluxe” lighting setup. The thing arrived 8 days later in 2 awkward 4.5 foot boxes that gave the FedEx guy a 2 trip to the door exercise and the curiosity to ask as to their contents. When I replied ”$800 Christmas tree” the man already heading back to his truck, stopped mid stride, pivoted, then examined me quizzically while uttering “those are big boxes but there ain’t nothin solid gold in em”. And that was the last pleasant occurrence involving the tree prior to “THE TROUBLES”!