General Question

cecilia09's avatar

Why does my boyfriend ask me obvious questions?

Asked by cecilia09 (205points) December 13th, 2016

I feel either he needs a sense of security or he has nothing else to say LOL, he asked me the other days,‘so do you think I should put all the sweets that my mom baked me in the refrigerator? In my mind I was just like REALLY!!!, to me the answer is obvious, I love to advise and give him my opinion, but sometimes I feel he asks dumb things.

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9 Answers

si3tech's avatar

@cecilia09 Is it possible he’s nervous and tripping over his own feet, wanting to please you?
Or casting about for something to say?

rojo's avatar

Sometimes in the early years of a relationship people need to make conversation for fear of being thought insensitive to the feelings of the other partner.

It takes a while to get used to being together without the need for conversation all the time.

I hazard a guess that in a few years you will be asking why he never talks to you anymore; we all do it at some point.

cecilia09's avatar

@rojo we have been 2 years and half together, and he has always been like this, I find it weird to be honest and for the fact that he is in his mid 30s, he cant think logically, But I forgot to mention he has a disorder called ADD. he is quite impulsive.

CWOTUS's avatar

Ahhh… that last is pretty revealing.

I suspect that he’s asking you these types of questions as a coping mechanism for his ADD. That is, without you he would go ahead and put the baked goods in the refrigerator. And really, what’s the harm in either doing that or not doing that? Who cares, right?

But he asks you questions like that, I suspect, in case that would be considered a problem in some way. (Some impulsive acts may have graver consequences, to him, to you or to things that you share in common. So they’re not always dumb or obvious questions.)

cecilia09's avatar

@CWOTUS well obviously he has to put them in the refrigerator they have eggs,you cannot leave baked goods outside,they go bad.

CWOTUS's avatar

Eventually, everything goes bad if it’s real food to start with. But as a rule, baked goods* – even those containing eggs or egg products – do not require refrigeration. They’ll go stale from exposure to air long before they go “bad”.
——
*That is, “pastries and cookies”. Pies and some other baked pastry items with fruit fillings may be different, and of course by “baked goods” I don’t mean such things as casseroles, which obviously require refrigeration.

CWOTUS's avatar

Now you’ve got me thinking that he’s reacting to strange notions that you have about what is and is not obvious. (This is not a personal attack. I had the same kind of learning process while I was starting to live with my wife, because she had certain set ideas – same as I did – about “how the world should be organized and categorized”.)

He’s just learning how to live with you. And as a general rule, baked goods taste better at room temperature, and refrigeration often tends to dehydrate foods if they’re not perfectly sealed.

Mariah's avatar

Maybe the things that seem obvious to you aren’t obvious to him. Parents/society naturally tend to teach girls “homemaking” things like food preparation from a young age more so than they do for boys. I’ve had to teach my boyfriend some “obvious” stuff ever since we’ve moved in together. We just have a different set of life experiences.

BTW, I agree with @CWOTUS that not everything containing cooked eggs needs to be refrigerated. Cookies that had egg in them will not make you sick if you leave them unrefrigerated.

gayy4maari's avatar

I think it’s because, he knows you know but just want to see exactly what you’ll say.

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