General Question

Kardamom's avatar

Do you know anyone who is always sarcastic and never anything else?

Asked by Kardamom (33291points) August 1st, 2017

Do you have any people in your life who can only make sarcastic remarks, rather than engaging in other kinds of conversation?

I like a well placed sarcastic remark as much as the next guy, but I find it very tiresome to hear only sarcastic remarks, rather than having real conversations, or being serious when a situation calls for being serious, or even employing other kinds of humor that adults can understand and appreciate.

To me, sarcastic remarks are kind of like the pre-teens of the world of humor, the txt spk of the world of words. Sarcastic remarks can be funny and cute, when employed at the right moment, but when they’re used excessively, and to the exclusion of other forms of communication, they’re just annoying.

Have you ever been able to steer an excessively sarcastic person into other forms of communication? If so, how did you do it?

Believe it or not, I am not trying to be silly (or sarcastic) in asking this question, that’s why I’m putting it in General.

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12 Answers

kimchi's avatar

I find it tiresome as well, because I feel obligated to reply with an even funnier response. I feel like I have to make the other person laugh as well. I also find it tiresome because I have to pretend to laugh and elaborate on it. Therefore, it is annoying and very tiring.
Some of my smart ass friends are those people. Trust me, I know how it feels.
I have been able to steer an excessively sarcastic person into toning the sarcasm down by asking them questions about their personal lives. I found that this helps the other person become more serious and actually want to talk about something.

Sneki2's avatar

I hate it too. People like that are not worth talking with.
As all good things, sarcasm should be used in small doses and with good timing.

Berserker's avatar

On the Internet, perhaps. Offline no, never met anyone who was literally sarcastic at all times.

Response moderated (Unhelpful)
chyna's avatar

None in my real life, but I’ve met a few on Fluther who are like that.

dabbler's avatar

Sounds like a case of insecurity to me, and lazy habit, to always be in a sarcastic voice.
Let’s hear what the person has to say without the exaggeration and soft lie of sarcasm.

JLeslie's avatar

I don’t have anyone who is solely sarcastic, but in the last few years I am more and more frustrated with people who use too much sarcasm. When they don’t have the ability to read that the other person is NOT joking, nor in a joking mood. Either the sarcasm gets misinterpreted or is truly insensitive.

I used to use more sarcasm, but I have purposely reduced it. Recently, we had exchange students here, about 30 in town, and I noticed a couple of people using a lot of sarcasm with the kids. I told them, sarcasm doesn’t work well when someone has trouble with the language. That’s all I said, but the rest of what I thought was it’s also a risk when it’s a different culture, plus these are young people who have been lectured to be “good kids” while staying here, so joking with them about them doing something wrong is not funny. I don’t know if anyone actually listened to me or not.

Interestingly, my husband has been more sarcastic the last few years, and I’ve called him on it a few times. He does not heed my call on it, he dismisses it. The last few years have been more difficult than our other 20, although thank goodness much improved now than two years ago, and it really makes me think his overly sarcastic stint is rooted in his own unhappiness and anger. Do you find that? That sarcastic people maybe are less happy? Overall, he has a great sense of humor, and he is a very caring guy. He isn’t the type to usually want to put someone down or make them feel bad, just the opposite.

funkdaddy's avatar

A lot of what people tend to call sarcasm doesn’t fit the definition, and is instead banter.

Sarcasm: the use of irony to mock or convey contempt.
Banter: the playful and friendly exchange of teasing remarks.

The difference is in the intent. And intent is up for interpretation. I can’t imagine anyone being comfortable with a person who wants to convey contempt or to mock someone constantly, that’s miserable. It’s unlikely anyone wants to be miserable, so it really depends on how it’s received.

I love to banter with people I like and feel comfortable with. I’m not comfortable doing it with people who are serious by nature, or who might not pick up that I’m joking. Those people sometimes call it sarcasm. Sometimes they just don’t get it, but know something else is behind the words and that makes them uncomfortable.

I think banter and even sarcasm are underrated as a shortcut. So much of what is said in general conversation is already understood by both parties, especially if they’re familiar. Using either subtly points out the inanity at the start of most conversations, so with someone who picks up on it, you can move past all that, hopefully with a shared smile.

It’s not for everyone, the problems come in when you start talking about individuals instead of larger concepts or you do it in an environment where someone could be embarrassed by another misinterpreting the double meaning.

But labeling it lazy or low humor doesn’t stand up to scrutiny. It’s a two step joke. You have to recognize the stated meaning isn’t correct, and then also find the true meaning. People I can banter with are generally quick witted and comfortable enough with who they are that they can survive scrutiny.

I wish there was more banter, but people are far too serious and worried about scrutiny, so it’s reserved for those treasured few.

try bantering next time someone you love wants to figure out where to eat, it will save you hours

RocketGuy's avatar

People who are sarcastic think they are being clever. It doesn’t take that much brain power to make snide comments. Satire on the other hand takes some skill.

Coloma's avatar

Not in real life but I can think of a few here in fluthertown.

Sneki2's avatar

@funkdaddy That makes quite a lot of sence. I think that’s what I wanted to say, I just didn’t know the difference between sarcasm and banter.

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