Social Question

chinchin31's avatar

If your friend never introduces you to her boyfriend after 3 years what would you think?

Asked by chinchin31 (1748points) March 12th, 2018

I have a friend for 3 years now and she has never introduced me to her boyfriend. I think this is really weird but I just ignore it. I have even invited her to social events where she is welcome to bring him but she never does. She showed me a picture of him once after I asked her but that is it. They live together too and I know he is real because he has pictures of her on his facebook but she has none of him on hers. I just think it is weird and creepy. I feel like maybe there is something about him that she is ashamed of. How would you act in this kind of situation? ?

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16 Answers

chyna's avatar

Very odd. Have you asked her to meet him?

Dutchess_lll's avatar

Is it possible he is just a friend, hence the FB pics, but she has fantasized about something more?
What kind of pics of her does he have?

Response moderated
KNOWITALL's avatar

Can you invite both of them to dinner specifically, like a double date? Friends do that a lot. Of course if he’s a jerk or abusive it will put you in a bad position where you have to try to help her so be careful, you never know about people.

rojo's avatar

A – that he is not what I define as a boyfriend
B – that he doesn’t exist.

Tropical_Willie's avatar

@rojo ^

C. She thinks you are competition !

Jeruba's avatar

That she’s been lying to one of you. Or both. And she doesn’t want to be outed.

Kardamom's avatar

This exact thing happened to me. I eventually found out that he was a jerk. My friend had dated several (cheating) jerks before this guy. I think she was afraid that I would figure out that this guy was a jerk too, even though I had no reason to think that, because I had never met him.

When I finally did meet him, he did something kind of shitty to me, which she ignored. Even though we had been friends for over 10 years, and had been very close. She avoided me after that incident, and then ended up marrying the guy, and basically disappeared. I think she was embarrassed by her lack of ability to sense bad behavior in the men that she dated, but she was so desperate to have a boyfriend/husband that it was easier to ditch a long time friend, than to admit she had terrible judgement regarding picking men, or having to be alone.

kritiper's avatar

You embarrass her.

johnpowell's avatar

My sister likes to embarrass me. That is why I keep my ladies as far away from her as I can.

janbb's avatar

That either you and she are not very good friends or that there is something wrong with her boyfriend. Do you want to ask her which it is? That’s the only way you’ll know.

elbanditoroso's avatar

She is worried you are going to steal her boyfriend.

chinchin31's avatar

LOL. why would i steal her boyfriend… I am married lol

elbanditoroso's avatar

@chinchin31 – there are plenty of married women that wouldn’t let that stop them

Kardamom's avatar

@chinchin31 Do any of your other friends or acquaintences know the boyfriend (or your friend)? I wonder if they might have some insight.

Have you ever been introduced to any of her previous boyfriends?

snowberry's avatar

Some people are reclusive, and don’t like to be social. It could be that he’s just one of those types.

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