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janbb's avatar

Do you feel attached to your inanimate household items?

Asked by janbb (52386points) 3 months ago

This is silly but I am getting a new gas stove but feel sad about getting rid of old faithful electric stove. Some of this is definitely environmental and I am looking to donate it somewhere rather than having it go to a landfill. But I also hate changes in my environment and am somewhat sad about getting rid of him or her.

I only want nice answers or very gentle mocking. :-)

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27 Answers

johnpowell's avatar

No. And this makes my life fucking horrible. My mom and sister are mild-hoarders. They do not understand why I do not give a single fuck about possessions.

janbb's avatar

I don’t think I’m a hoarder but I hear what you’re saying.

johnpowell's avatar

Give the stuff away. What you have is better than what others are using. Battered-Romans shelter and so on.

edit :: fuck autocorrect… But I will let it stand.

janbb's avatar

I don’t think you’re hearing me. I’m not a hoarder and I give plenty of stuff away. And I am giving this away; I just have feelings of sadness about it.

LuckyGuy's avatar

Getting rid of an appliance would not bother me at all. It figure it is time and the new one will be much better.
I have trouble getting rid of clothes that fit and are in good shape, toys my kids played with, (even some of their baby clothes!), kids’ elementary school papers, – of course photos.
Because I have space and live in a semi-rural area with a barn I can find a use for anything.
That is a problem. I’ll save that piece of wood. I can use it as a door stop, or to start a fire, or fill in a hole, or….

marinelife's avatar

Sorry, I seldom have feelings of sadness about possessions, but I can feel yours. I think you should honor it.

zenvelo's avatar

I have been trying to get my landlord to replace my old, yellow refrigerator. I have no attachment to the fridge, other than it is a great place for magnets. I will be a bit upset if a new fridge is stainless steel and non magnetic.

But generally, I don’t get attached to furniture. I do like one chair that was my dad’s that was passed down to me, a wooden “captain’s chair”.

canidmajor's avatar

I feel the same way, @janbb. Only about things I have chosen, though. If an appliance came with the house,unless it was fabulous, I don’t really care. But if I have spent the time choosing and researching and maybe even moving something from one house to another (like, for example, washers and dryers) then yeah, I get a bit sad and nostalgic.

janbb's avatar

@canidmajor Thank god, someone is as nutty as me! :-)

Alas, poor Gemini, I knew him (or her) well.

I think part of my feelings have to do with the changes in my family and wanting to hold on to some things although conversely I have also changed many things and gotten rid of many.

stanleybmanly's avatar

I understand completely and am very attached to objects that have weathered decades of grueling campaigns along with me. The wife, on the other hand, will brook no sentiment when it comes to such matters, and ruthlessly monitors everything from my attire through refrigerated leftovers. Any hint of fraying on the part of a faithful sweatshirt is met with immediate and irrevocable disposal, and since it is my (assigned) function to take out the trash, she has taken to hauling my treasures to work with her for clandestine disposal. Alas, I’d better rush off now to make the bed and police the kitchen to demonstrate my worth and (hopefully) stave off the fateful day when it’s my turn to be hauled off for clandestine disposal.

KNOWITALL's avatar

I am also somewhat attached to some objects or sameness in general, simply because I don’t like change, kinda like a dog- lol.

Zaku's avatar

Yes. I felt sad when my first house’s heater had to be replaced, and attached to other appliances – radiators, stoves, fridges, tables, chairs, couches, TVs, knives, flippers, pillows… the house itself, all kinds of stuff.

I think it’s natural for most people (and animals – cats and dogs get attached to their stuff too), and that people who don’t tend to have been trained out of it by our culture that prefers rational-materialist ideas and tries to beat out some of our natural tendencies by calling them childish or unrealistic.

flutherother's avatar

Yes, to a certain extent. It is what makes a house a home.

janbb's avatar

@flutherother Yes. My home has always been my nest and I guess some changes to it, now that it is such an empty nest, are disconcerting. As I said, I have made plenty of improvements and cleared things out but some things just throw me.

Darth_Algar's avatar

No. I try not to let my possessions own me.

Jeruba's avatar

There’s a line in the excellent A Gentleman in Moscow (Towles, 2016) that says: “For eventually we come to hold our dearest possessions more closely than we hold our friends” (p. 14). When I read this, it struck me that the author—born in 1964—was too young for such a sentiment; whereas I could easily relate to it.

Some of us have a tendency to personify belongings (“faithful,” “him or her”). Even as we recognize the anthropomorphic fantasy, we feel guilty toward them when we dispose of them. We fear hurting their feelings after they have stood by us. I have held back from tossing some things that were beyond salvage simply because I didn’t want them lying in some garbage heap as if no one had ever loved them. Sometimes I wrap them up for their own privacy (and mine).

Even if we don’t go that far, they’re a part of our history and hence part of who we are. Yes, even a stove.

We may also dislike the discontinuity in our environment. If we don’t like having things change around us, the constancy may give a feeling of security. Getting comfortable with something new is unsettling, even if we like it. I missed my old car for more than a year after I bought a new one.

I currently have some new furniture on order, something I should have done at least ten years ago, and it’s not that I didn’t want something fresh, but—it’s still pretty in a faded, shabby sort of way, and it’s too late to worry about spilling something on it, and my now-grown-up kids used to sit there and watch TV, and I’m used to it.

On the other hand, my dear, I think gas stoves are inherently more lovable. See how it responds to you. See how finely you can tune it. See how pretty the flame is. Out with the old, in with the new! I hope you are very happy together.

janbb's avatar

@Jeruba Beautifully written! You and Towles captured my sentiments exactly. I would be much happier if she or he were going on to a new life with a new family but at the moment, Stovie seems destined for the landfill. I do personify many of my belongings.

Will try to settle into a comfortable relationship with the new stove.

CWOTUS's avatar

I’m far more attached to the animate household items. (And why isn’t that an appropriate adjective? I now want to know.)

Aethelwine's avatar

I hear you. We will be downsizing soon and I’m in the process of deciding what will need to go. Most likely a large, sturdy picnic table we’ve had for 20 years as well as a corner bench that we’ve had just as long. These two items were used for every birthday party for our children.

We still use these items but only because we live in a large house right now. I hate to let them go.

janbb's avatar

@CWOTUS When I had those, I was.

omfgTALIjustIMDu's avatar

Yes, inordinately. I have a grandmother who is a hoarder and it terrifies me that I could turn into that one day. I can and do get rid of things, but the parting itself is very difficult and so is finding the motivation to do so. I still have probably a dozen t-shirts that I’ve never worn but they evoke memories of certain times of my life and I enjoy stumbling across them every now and then. It’s the emotional attachment, sentiment, and comfort that gets in the way.
Most people would be excited about getting a new car or a new computer or phone but I dread trading those trade-ins. I’m usually happier with the new, once I get used to it, but getting myself to trade in a phone that’s barely functioning that’s been through so much with me for a new (exactly the same) one that works is hard!

Adagio's avatar

Last year I discovered just how attached I was to the old cast-iron frypan I had owned for 37 years. After all those years, it was perfectly seasoned. Someone who comes to my house dropped it on their foot and the handle and some of the frypan side broke off. I was devastated, made worse I think by the fact that this person did not apologise, nor offer to contribute, even a small amount, to the cost of a new frypan. I’m over it now, but the new frypan is not a patch on the old one.
Afterthought: The old frypan had so much history attached to it, none of which is gone, of course, but it was part of the story, part of the furniture that accompanied that history!

rojo's avatar

No, I have unnatural attachments to my books and some of the souvenirs I have acquired over the years but not really any to appliances or other household goods.

Ok, maybe my cast iron skillets but that is it.

janbb's avatar

Update: The stove is going to Habitat tomorrow and I am feeling less emotional about the issue. Now I am just hoping the stove, the plumber and the inspector all show up in the right order.

stanleybmanly's avatar

good luck with that! In fact that comment is worthy of a question.

AshlynM's avatar

Not household items but other items.

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