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chyna's avatar

If you are an atheist or a non believer, would you go to your child’s baptism, no matter what their age is?

Asked by chyna (45011points) May 14th, 2018 from iPhone

Asked for a friend.

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25 Answers

cookieman's avatar

Sure, to support the child. My religious or non-religious beliefs are irrelevant.

Just like I would go to a friend’s wedding at a synagogue even though I’m not Jewish.

canidmajor's avatar

Yes. If the event is important to my child, I would go.

Jeruba's avatar

If the child wanted me to go, I’d say the same as @cookieman.

Kardamom's avatar

I would go. It’s not much different than going to a wedding in a church.

stanleybmanly's avatar

Of course I would go if the kid wanted me there.

canidmajor's avatar

I would definitely go (as I said) but I think there is a big difference between supporting one’s child who is taking such a definitive step into an organized religious commitment than going to a wedding in a church.

RedDeerGuy1's avatar

If I am a non-believer then why am I baptizing my kid? I would have a say then he/she wouldn’t be Baptized with out both patents consent. I was humiliated being baptized when I was 12 and 6’1” in the baby font. Six adults had to team up and lift me. I was forced to from the school to get baptized to go to grade 7. Same happened when I was forced to confirm. I said that I would not cast out evil because that would be aimed at the priest who forced me to join the faith or lose my friends. On the spectrum from evil to being a jerk It would be a toss up.

Jeruba's avatar

@RedDeerGuy1, I took “no matter what their age is” to mean that the child might be an adult, or at least a person who is considered an adult for purposes of baptism.

In the church I grew up in, a baby or young child could be “dedicated” (pretty much like a christening), but no one under the age of 12 could be baptized because it was considered a commitment, a public affirmation of faith. Therefore it was not something that a parent could force upon a child. It could only be performed for someone who was mature enough to receive it as a matter of choice. There were also required classes beforehand to make sure candidates understood what they were doing.

If one of my adult sons became religious and chose to be baptized, I would attend if invited and keep my opinions to myself. It’s not as if they wouldn’t already know where I stood.

Your baptism by force sounds barbaric.

RedDeerGuy1's avatar

@Jeruba If one of my children wanted to be Baptized then I would want to be there for support. As far as I know I don’t have any children. In another life I might have had a daughter named Talila.

ARE_you_kidding_me's avatar

I have gone to my nieces and nephews baptisms. Not even a second thought.

ragingloli's avatar

No. It would merely serve to remind me of my disappointment.
Disappointment in my spawn, which by this point I have certainly disowned, and
disappointment in myself, for failing to raise it correctly.

MrGrimm888's avatar

I would attend, if they asked. It would not be something that I would do to a young child. If they want to do it when they are old enough to understand what they’re doing, that’s ok.

I wouldn’t be happy about it. But I’d probably be supportive.

kritiper's avatar

No. Religious hypocrites are the worst and I would be one if I went.

Jeruba's avatar

I don’t think it would make me a hypocrite any more than it would if I as a straight person were to attend the wedding of a gay couple or I as a Protestant or Buddhist were to attend a bar mitzvah. Bearing witness to someone else’s major life event does not require subscribing to the same lifestyle or belief system yourself.

Aethelwine's avatar

Our youngest son wanted to be baptized the last day of church camp when he was 10 (he went yearly with his best friend.) I attended. Jon had to work.

Our son is now 14 and an atheist. He’s done attending church camp.

I misspelled baptized and spellcheck gave me braised. My son was braised.~

Pinguidchance's avatar

I’d miss out because my children refuse to believe in imaginary super beings.

janbb's avatar

My grandson was baptized at four months old the first day I met him. Of course I went.

My granddaughter on the other side was baptized and I wasn’t asked to attend. That was fine too.

rockfan's avatar

@ragingloli

So basically you would react the same way a religious fundamentalist does when they disown their children for making choices they disagree with. Just on the oppsite side of the same coin.

ragingloli's avatar

Of course.
It would be lucky to still be alive.

rockfan's avatar

@ragingloli

I keep forgetting that most of the time you’re just trolling

Aster's avatar

I thought most baptisms happened to infants. So going ” to support my child ” or if it’s ” important to my child” makes no sense. I think it’s hypocritical for an atheist to go to a baptism or to encourage his child to be baptized. I think not going makes the atheist fearful people would talk badly about him or her behind their back. I can hear them now: ” can you believe he switched gears for appearances?” or “he’s trying to hide from his true belief system or lack thereof.”
Reminds me of wanting to ” appear Establishment or Christian” when they’re not for fear of reprimand.
I admire the hairdresser atheist who told me that Christmas , to her, was just like any other day and she didn’t celebrate at all. She was true to herself and didn’t want to pretend for anyone. That takes a lot of courage.

Dutchess_III's avatar

@Aster In the 80s a trend started where they get baptized a second time when they’re 10 or so, so that they understand it is their choice. Of course, it’s not really. Not if the parents have brain washed the child into believing this has to be done.

Aster's avatar

^^ Yeah, my grandkids were told by their parents it had to be done. But they were about thirteen. I’m sure they were told what it meant.
I’m glad I went to my granddaughter’s baptism; it was really sweet the way the pastor did it. Personally, I don’t have any firm opinions on it.

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