General Question

jca's avatar

Do you ever think about an ex-boyfriend or ex-girlfriend and wonder what life would be like if you were with them?

Asked by jca (36025points) August 22nd, 2008

do you regret breaking up with anyone from your past and wish you were with them today? or wonder what life would be like if you were still in a relationship with them?

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22 Answers

loser's avatar

Actually, I was doing that earlier today. I hate when I do, though. Always makes me feel pathetic.

lefteh's avatar

My answer is an exact mirror of loser’s. Word for word.

Snoopy's avatar

Hmmmmm…...will anyone admit to “googling” an ex?

Allie's avatar

No, I don’t regret breaking up with any of them. And if I was the most recent ex I’d be the biggest jackass in the world.

(Jake, I see you crafting responses! Do your work!)

Snoopy's avatar

I maybe have googled a time or two

lefteh's avatar

As have I.

Shut up, Allie!

loser's avatar

Okay, so have I…

lefteh's avatar

Mine yielded no results for either, proving that they are gigantic failures.

[feeling better]

JackAdams's avatar

I had a 10-year separation from an ex-GF, and now we are in the process of getting back together, because during that 10 years, neither one of us found what we were seeking.

August 22, 2008, 11:19 PM EDT

aneedleinthehayy's avatar

my answer is yes.

and @snoopy, i sometimes myspace them, lol.

MacBean's avatar

I wonder sometimes, but I still don’t regret anything—the breaking up or the time together.

Bri_L's avatar

I will admit to all that has been admitted to so far.

marinelife's avatar

No. I don’t see the point. I can see where I made mistakes. For example, my first “love” was way too old for me (22 to my 16). We had absolutely nothing in common.

I screwed up the relationship when he came on too strong and scared me. I deliberately hurt him. I regret that part of my actions (hurting him), but he lived in a tiny town in Missouri and I cannot see myself there today.

cak's avatar

There was one that found me, it was fun to trade emails for about a week, then I realized he was still living in the past.

Other than that, nope, no desire to look them up. They are ex-boyfriends, for a good reason!

TheOnly1WithKFC's avatar

At times like those you have to realize that you are but one person in this one universe. There are no parallel, alternate, or w.e universes where you can think of you and this one person actually do get to live together as you’d like to think.

you’ve gotta make the best of what you have, in this universe, of course. There are more people out there!

take it easy :D

figbash's avatar

I’ve been in situations multiple times where I’ve reflected on where life would be if I had made different choices and how things would be different. In all cases I realized I simply wouldn’t be the person I am today if I had continued in those relationships.

One of the best lessons I learned came from an elderly man I was sitting with, when I was a patient observer, in my late teens and early twenties.

He told me that you should never focus on things that are lost, since those original things change so much from day to day. When we lose something, in effect, it ceases to be – that the ways in which we gained them initially were so subtle, there’s no way we could really duplicate them again, anyway. Any change that’s occurred in both people since then, has rendered the initial relationship almost invalid. Also, do you really want back what you had, or what you think you had?

This insight has always stuck with me when I’ve thought about various losses in my life, and in the cases when I’ve had another shot at something I’ve lost, I’ve been able to really view it for what it was. I decided instead, to move on.

nephrons's avatar

Yes, sometimes i remember/thinks about my ex.. BUT never did i waste time to wonder what might be my life with my ex in case our relationship did not end.. I seldom cry over spilled milk, for i assume everything are meant to be, however painful/hurting as the case maybe.. I always try so very hard to save established relationship, but if it is doomed to fail even for how many attempts i tried (to save) then thats it! It was not meant to be.. You maintain your self respect and one point wiser than before.. Consider it life’s lessons we should learn..

punkrockworld's avatar

Yes, I think about my ex all the time. Its really kinda pathetic though. He just pops up in my mind and I can’t help it. I always wonder who he’s with or if he’s seeing anybody.
I’m basically just torturing myself.

Snoopy's avatar

@punk. That will decrease as more time passes….hang in there :)

punkrockworld's avatar

Thanks Snoopy =]

MissAnthrope's avatar

Yeah, I do wonder about my exes.. but then again, I wonder about a lot of people that I once was close to and now have grown apart. What/how they are doing, etc.

Being a lesbian makes things more complicated in a sense.. our dating pool tends to be smaller, so we tend to be friends first and/or friends after. I still talk to my first girlfriend from 10 years ago. There are three exes that I cared for deeply and wish things had gone differently… I’m in the process of re-dating the most recent one of these (we broke up in April).

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