Social Question

mazingerz88's avatar

American astronauts having sexual intercourse in space, fact or fiction?

Asked by mazingerz88 (25284points) March 9th, 2019 from iPhone

I remember reading an article years ago about NASA gathering data on space sex between humans in space. Just can’t recall whether it was a serious or satirical article.

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69 Answers

ragingloli's avatar

Facials will surely be interesting to watch.

kritiper's avatar

It’s hogwash. Sex without gravity is almost impossible.
Think about it! And remember that for every action there is an equal and opposite reaction, so true in weightless space.

Darth_Algar's avatar

Fiction. Probably an Onion article.

mazingerz88's avatar

@kritiper The article mentioned body harnesses.

ucme's avatar

There’s clearly a uranus joke here, but i’m far too well behaved to indulge myself.

SQUEEKY2's avatar

It would be neat to know how the out COME was.

Dutchess_lll's avatar

Why not? But why just Americans?

ragingloli's avatar

Because the rest of the world does not need zero gravity to be able do it.

elbanditoroso's avatar

If there has been sex in space, you can be sure that NASA would never have announced it publicly.

My guess is that the answer is YES, there has, but no one will ever talk about it.

kritiper's avatar

@mazingerz88 Yeah, think about it. Sex in harness. I have. There’s still that equal and opposite reaction thing to consider. Not that I would be opposed to giving it a whirl…

Kardamom's avatar

The astronauts have cameras on them pretty much at all times. Pretty sure these people are professionals, rather than an average cross section of people. I’m pretty sure they can, and do, live without sex while they are up there.

In the future, when regular folks go into space, not just highly trained, professional astronauts, sex will happen in space.

Patty_Melt's avatar

Professionals???!!! Who was that female stalker who wore NASA diapers so she could drive longer without stopping? She was a piece of work, that one!

I have long thought I would like to attempt sex in zero g.
So far as drifting apart, that’s what legs are for. Or, dig those nails into cheeks and he’s going nowhere, and coming right where he should.
Even if it was awkward I would want to give it a fair try.

Darth_Algar's avatar

Was that female stalker an astronaut?

stanleybmanly's avatar

Think so. Lisa Marie Nowak. What a world.

Come to think of it, a weightless environment might be a great boon to a disabled individual when it comes to sex.

kritiper's avatar

Perhaps the spacecraft would have some machine one astronaut could be fastened to that would assist as well as limit the stroke. Possibly even with a rheostat so that the parties could control the speed of the thing without flying apart…

Darth_Algar's avatar

Alright, so one person out of several hundred. And that’s an indicator of the professionalism of the whole?

kritiper's avatar

And springs! The thing could have springs!

filmfann's avatar

The Russians did this years ago, and a child was conceived. Sadly, he has no super powers. Seriously.
I don’t know if NASA is doing this, but I can imagine it’s possible.

Brian1946's avatar

Who gives a floating fuck?

Asstonuts, that’s who!

Caravanfan's avatar

Nope, most certainly not.

ARE_you_kidding_me's avatar

I don’t think guys can even get it up in space.

RedDeerGuy1's avatar

Sex not sure, but masturbation, I would like to know.

mazingerz88's avatar

If it’s true about the NASA sex research, I understand why they would keep it classified. Who needs all that negative reaction from conservative Americans? Lol

One thing I would bet a million dollars to. Cosmonauts and astronauts who spent months in space waggled the eggplant.

MrGrimm888's avatar

As AYKM mentioned, I believe that I have heard that a male can’t get an erection in zero gravity.

Lesbian sex should be constant.

Dutchess_lll's avatar

If zero g doesn’t affect blood circulation why would a male be unable to get a hadron.

Patty_Melt's avatar

Yeah. I can’t imagine how zero g would affect blood flow. Now, in a vacuum, I could see a problem, like, POW!

Would zero g
Affect a big O?
An accurate answer
I do not know.
From floating vaginas
We just may learn
But they might decide
It’s not our concern.
If upon return,
Said ladies all blush,
We might surmise,
Success in the bush.

Oh gosh, somebody stop me.

Patty_Melt's avatar

@Darth_Algar, just because only one was bizarre enough to reach public attention does not mean others aren’t weird too.

Darth_Algar's avatar

@Patty_Melt

Ah, yes, arguing from lack of evidence. Excellent tactic.

Patty_Melt's avatar

What big argument? I simply pointed out that there was evidence that your statement about professional decorum may have been flawed.
I never called NASA a den of iniquity.

Darth_Algar's avatar

Wasn’t my statement. And I’m simply pointing out that your questioning of the professionalism of the whole, based on the actions of one, is flawed.

Besides, just because someone had issues in their personal life doesn’t mean that they not professional at their job.

Dutchess_lll's avatar

What is so unprofessional about two adults having sex? Are they not allowed ANY fun up there?

ARE_you_kidding_me's avatar

@Dutchess_lll Are you allowed to screw at work on the clock?

mazingerz88's avatar

^^ This answer convinced me NASA indeed conducted sex research. Space workers especially for months would take issue with not being able to function as a normal human being just because they’re being paid, especially in their downtime.

“Ah, Houston we have a problem. Been three months, my work had been flawless and I really need to yank one out.”

Houston : Well ok. But you have to do it outside on a spacewalk.

(Whispers to tech next to him)

“.....cut his Internet feed….”

“What happened? Fuck you, Houston.”

Dutchess_lll's avatar

Are they on the clock 24/7, with NO free personal time for weeks at a time @ARE_you_kidding_me?

Patty_Melt's avatar

Military, astronaut, undercover cop, all stay on duty until that duty is done.

ARE_you_kidding_me's avatar

@Dutchess_lll Space travel is on the clock with some possible exceptions on the ISS

Dutchess_lll's avatar

Well…why would it not be OK to have sexual intercourse during that time?

ragingloli's avatar

Because you can not open the windows to air out the squid smell.

Patty_Melt's avatar

Right, and no smoking allowed.

kritiper's avatar

GOD I love this thread!

Dutchess_III's avatar

WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH SEXUAL INTERCOURSE THAT IT WOULD NOT BE ALLOWED?! Geez. What if one of them is a woman who is paying off a favor one of the guys did for her?? Are they not allowed to pay off favors while they’re on the cock clock?

stanleybmanly's avatar

It almost certainly breaks some rule about officers cohabiting on government property. You know the catchphrase “conduct unbecoming…”

Dutchess_III's avatar

Wait…what if two of the astronauts are married to each other. Is it OK for them to have sex in space?

stanleybmanly's avatar

It’s ok with me. They don’t have to be married as far as I’m concerned. The question is can or should they be allowed to “get away with it”? The answer is that the day will surely come when they can.

Dutchess_III's avatar

But it’s like sex is a bad thing?

Patty_Melt's avatar

No, it isn’t about the good or bad of sex. It is about being on the job.
If they are asleep and an emergency occurs, they can waske up and deal with it. If they are eating, they can stop to take care of things. If land base needs to contact them, a busy signal is not an option.
People can survive indefinitely without sex. It is not unreasonable to expect them to not when in space.

Dutchess_lll's avatar

You can stop sex faster than you can get out of a shower.

ragingloli's avatar

Most men can start, enjoy, and properly finish it faster than getting out of a shower.

Dutchess_lll's avatar

Right @ragingloli? I can go months and months without sex with no problem. Men seem to have much harder time doing that.

mazingerz88's avatar

NASA would never reveal its space sex protocols?

Dutchess_lll's avatar

I don’t see why they wouldn’t call it an experiment and expect scientific observations.

Patty_Melt's avatar

Sure.
WANTED: Two persons to go through space training, blast off and have sex out in the great beyond. Successful candidate must be in superior health and must be able to pass rigorous physical and mental tests. Must be able to connect electrodes properly so results can be studied. Approximately thirty doctors and scientists and some of their friends and spouses will observe while you screw. Some may wish to offer suggestions.
Those with thick coarse hair around their anus need not apply.

Only a few stoners and a guy in Alabama named Dougie would want to volunteer.

Dutchess_III's avatar

Not as the main part of the mission, silly, but as a side conversation and only IF it happens. The main mission is to fix the Hubble or do whatever, but they measure all kinds of things on the side while they’re up there.

kritiper's avatar

NEWS FLASH!
“The International Space Station was destroyed today when, it is assumed, that a small globule of dried sperm got caught in the matrix. It has always been thought that this scenario would be the most dangerous aspect of sex in space.
CGI animation at 11.”

Dutchess_III's avatar

(Are they allowed to masturbate?)

Patty_Melt's avatar

Probably don’t need to. The major rush of going into space would maybe get them there automatically.

Dutchess_III's avatar

….For weeks or months, or however long they’re up there, at a time? All they have to do is think “I’m in space!” and boom!

Patty_Melt's avatar

When you bash heaven, god gonna kick you out.

Dutchess_III's avatar

That made no sense.

Patty_Melt's avatar

Pointing out you dump on everything. We can always count on it.

Dutchess_III's avatar

I’m just asking you to clarify how being in space would “get them there automatically.”

Patty_Melt's avatar

No. You’re not. You are like a little puppy, following me on every thread, and pissing on my ankles. It matters not if I have made a point, or commented in jest, you want to pick anything I say to death.
I feel neither need nor desire to participate in your freakish obsessions. I declare now I will ignore anything you post.

Dutchess_III's avatar

LOL! I am not following you!

stanleybmanly's avatar

Considering the original question, would anyone here be shocked to learn that it happened?

mazingerz88's avatar

I’ll be shocked if it didn’t happen for those who were up there for months.

Patty_Melt's avatar

@stanleybmanly, what have you got? You know some stuff?

stanleybmanly's avatar

Nope. But it’s one conspiracy theory I would not bet against

Patty_Melt's avatar

Okay. <smile> If you get something, you share.

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