Social Question

longgone's avatar

Is a good deed still "good" when you do it grudgingly?

Asked by longgone (19608points) November 5th, 2019

When it’s done from a sense of duty, rather than charity?

Observing members: 0 Composing members: 0

23 Answers

chyna's avatar

Do you mean like if a certain politician was on fire and I could save their life if I peed on them? And I had to think about it, but did pee on them? All hypothetical of course. No, I don’t believe it still should be considered a good deed.

Dutchess_lll's avatar

I think it is. Regardless of how you feel about it, the recipient benefits.

Patty_Melt's avatar

I actually agree with dutchess. When the outcome is good, it isn’t important how the doer felt. The deed is still a good thing.

Lots of combat veterans come home with regret for having killed enemy combatants, which is a right feeling, but was a necessary action, so good.

People could also do good unintentionally.

SEKA's avatar

If you can’t give it from your heart, you should keep it to yourself. I wouldn’t want @chyna peeing on me unless she really felt it to be her only option and she felt it the right thing to do without feeling the need to hesitate. Yes @chyna, I get it that I wasn’t the politician to whom you were referring. Please hesitate there and I’ll pray for your soul ;]

kritiper's avatar

Yes. Why can’t it be about some other person??

stanleybmanly's avatar

What is it about the deed which makes it “good”? If it is of benefit to the recipient, the deed is good for said recipient regardless of the mood or intent of those responsible.

Dutchess_lll's avatar

^^^^ Exactly. I wasn’t exactly thrilled to give money to my sister. I knew it would create a small hardship for us…but it helped her out immensely…I hope.

lucillelucillelucille's avatar

Or when it’s done under coercion? I don’t know how good that’d be.

JLeslie's avatar

I say it’s still a good deed.

Sagacious's avatar

Yes, but you make an F anyway.

Dutchess_lll's avatar

Who’s keeping score @Sagacious?

Patty_Melt's avatar

What if @chyna buzzed a killer fart during the peeing?
Does that change the status of the deed?

MrGrimm888's avatar

A good deed, is a good deed. If you put your life in jeopardy, to save another, the price is high, and the results might not be worth it. In the end, I always felt that the price was worth it.

I suppose, it depends on your morality. Risk, versus reward.

A firefighter, for example, puts their life at risk, to help others .
Running into a burning building, just to save a person who will eventually die anyway?

This, to me, is a ethical question.

Same as when I was a LEO. I knew, in every situation, that the person who I was trying to save, would ultimately die anyway, so why risk my life. Well. I just did it. It didn’t make rational sense. But I felt, like I had to do something. Because I could. And I’d probably survive the situation. Even if injured, or if my life was in danger. I believe in myself, and the abilities I have.

It’s not really logical. If you think about it. But I pit myself in harms way, because I felt it was the right thing to do. I have/had the power, to prevent someone from suffering. That grows an anger in me. An anger that drives me, to do things that don’t make sense. Why fight, when I know that the odds are that I will lose? Well. Because I have a belief in my self. That I can overcome whatever life throws at me. I had to fight 5 bouncers, that came onto one of my venues once. I knew the odds, were that they’d hurt me, and they did. But they were attacking a bunch of youngsters, with no experience. I don’t know what set the whole thing off. But there was a fight in the men’s room. I didn’t have time to get my other guys, so I went in alone. There was blood everywhere, and the 5 bouncers had downed at leat 3 young guys. They were on the floor, and in bad shape. The 5 bouncers were killing them.

I fought the biggest guy, while holding a young kid in my arms.I used a knife chop, on his neck, and he dropped. I head butted, and elbowed the rest of them. They eventually left. They were arrested. The younger kids, were badly injured. I wasn’t sure what to do, when I entered the bathroom, there were 2 younger guys down. The bouncers were making short work of the others.

I used everything in my book, and fought them all off. The youngsters, were sent to the ER. I was hurt, but not enough to keep fighting. The bathroom was small. I defeated the other 5 bouncers. I saved 7 20 something year olds. Some, like I said, were badly hurt. But, I decided to engage the other 5, regardless of the outcome.
It didn’t make sense, logically. But I took them all on. They were bouncers, like me. So, they had experience in fighting. Logistically, that should have damn near killed me.

But. I chose to take all of them on. Stupid. But I chose to defy logic. Grudgingly. In those 5 minutes, or so, I decided to go against my better judgment.
I guess I was lucky. But I saved those 7 guys. And I put a ass kicking on those 5 other bouncers. Something that I doubt they’ll ever forget. Everything worked out perfectly. They apparently weren’t experienced in fighting in tight quarters.

I escaped with minor injuries. Once I took down their biggest guy, they panicked. And I took them out with ease. They ran out. But like I said, they were arrested. And some had to go to the ER, themselves.

I could have just called the cops
But I couldn’t let those youngters die. Those 5 bouncers, knew what they were doing. And they were going to kill, some of those young guys.

I just couldn’t stand by, and watch them get beaten to death. So. I got involved. I am not sure what part of my brain wouldn’t allow this… But. I went in, unarmed, and pretty sure I would get beaten down…

“Good deed,” I’m not sure if this qualified. But. I knew what was going on, and had seconds, to respond. There was really no “right” answer. I just threw myself into the situation…

ucme's avatar

For the recipient it is, the act for the giver is bound to feel less rewarding.

KNOWITALL's avatar

Sure it is. Your internal struggle is your burden, the recipient just knows their need is met.

jca2's avatar

My boss is also my friend. There are four people in our office, not including the receptionist (different receptionist every day). So it’s me, boss, and two other people. This year, one of the other people was out on his birthday. The other person specified she did not want any birthday celebration for her birthday. For my birthday, my boss got me a cake, flowers and a balloon. For my boss’s birthday, which comes after mine, I got a big cake from Costco and invited anybody from the neighboring offices to come have cake. I thought it was very nice. My boss/friend texted me that afternoon “next year, flowers and balloons too.” SMH who does that?

KNOWITALL's avatar

@jca2 Was she joking maybe?

jca2's avatar

@KNOWITALL: I gave you the GA LOL. No, I don’t think she was joking. I think she thinks the right thing to do is cake, flowers and a balloon so that’s what she wants in return. When I read it, I was really shocked and plotting a way to not do it next year (like to be out on her birthday or something).

jca2's avatar

I forgot to add that she also had a party (a party separate from work) and I knew I was going and would give her the “real” gift there. So to me, the work event was just a way to have cake and get people in to wish her a happy day.

MrGrimm888's avatar

How about a cake, with flowers made of icing? That should kill two birds, with one stone…

Patty_Melt's avatar

Learn this
then get a tank of helium at Walmart or party city. Fill them with helium instead of air. It is easy to do.
Make a nice bunch. When you hand them to her she won’t be able to tell the difference, until she tries to lay them somewhere. That way she will have cake, flowers, balloons, and a party game called get your flowers off the ceiling.

Of course photos are a must.

Patty_Melt's avatar

I have convinced myself I must do this to someone myself.

It would be fun to have a lot, and hand them out to party guests. What a great gag!!!

Dutchess_III's avatar

@Sagacious said, “Yes, but you make an F anyway.” I ask again, who is the one handing out grades? Anyone can answer that question, BTW.

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