General Question

poofandmook's avatar

Advice regarding giving a co-worker rides to and from work?

Asked by poofandmook (17285points) August 30th, 2008

A new girl was just hired. She’s family to two people I work with and she usually rides with them. Today her aunt (yet another family member in a different but related department) asked me if I could take her home, since I live 3 miles away.

This may seem selfish, but I don’t want this to become a regular occurrence. I don’t want to be responsible for someone getting to work, nor do I want to possibly be late because I was picking up someone else. I work a lot of overtime and don’t have much time to myself, and I don’t want what little time I have being cut into by giving this girl rides. The two people I work with, her family members, work slightly different shifts so it requires this girl to come in early, or them to stay late. How do I avoid being roped into being a regular ride?

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15 Answers

whatthefluther's avatar

Don’t be readily available every time they ask, just when its not inconvenient for you. Have “plans” to meet a friend or have an “appointment” after work. If they find you available the first several times they ask, they’ll come to rely on you. And quickly you’ll become a viable option that they will regularly utilize at their convenience.

JackAdams's avatar

I’m assuming that your co-workers are not your friends, or that you don’t like them, because folks usually don’t mind doing occasional favors for friends. If I’m wrong about that, then I apologize for misunderstanding you, but I detected a kind of undercurrent of animosity towards them from you, in the “tone” of your details.

Because gas prices are currently close to $4/gallon, I don’t think it is out-of-line at all for you to request that you be paid to transport the co-worker home, and $1/mile would certainly seem “reasonable” to me, if I were the person needing the ride.

But, if you made the charge UNREASONABLE, then the rider would be forced to look elsewhere for transportation.

The reason I would try to accommodate these co-workers, is because there could come a time when you would be in need of a ride, and they would be hard-pressed to turn you down, knowing that you had been “there” for them, when they needed a helping hand.

Remember, please, that those who request favors, will sooner or later be called upon, to GRANT favors.

August 30, 2008, 2:56 PM EDT

poofandmook's avatar

no.. I don’t have any animosity toward them. I wouldn’t say I’m friends with them, and I don’t want to be mistaken here. I don’t mind occasionally doing it. But because I live so close, and this girl doesn’t drive, and they all work different shifts, I don’t want to be relied upon as the first option. I don’t want that responsibility. What if I’m sick? What if she sleeps through the alarm? What if I sleep through the alarm? You see what I mean?

JackAdams's avatar

I had a similar situation, about a hundred years ago (it seems) while living in Hawaii.

This gal I knew wasn’t a co-worker, but she was a neighbor, and was always trying to bum rides from me, and because she looked fantastic when naked, I usually did what she asked.

One day, I presented her with a monthly bus pass, which only cost me $20, and allowed her unlimited rides on the bus, for an entire 30-day period.

She stopped asking me for rides, from that point on, but I never again got to see her naked.

August 30, 2008, 3:05 PM EDT

girlofscience's avatar

Ask scamp to do it.

poofandmook's avatar

scamp doesn’t live near us.

SeekerSeekiing's avatar

I’d just be assertive and say, “Yes, I can give you a ride today, but I don’t want to become obligated to giving you rides; once in a while is fine.”

Mr_M's avatar

I would just make an excuse when they ask. If they ask for a ride in, tell them you “have a hard enough time getting YOURSELF in on time”. When they ask for a ride home, tell them you’re meeting someone for dinner, or you’re going shopping, or the gym… They will eventually get the hint. They may get annoyed, too, but tough.

poofandmook's avatar

@Mr M: That’s what I was worried about. I’m not interested in making any enemies, but I’m also not a taxi service. I firmly believe that you shouldn’t accept a job offer if you don’t have solid transportation. We’re big girls and boys now; we should be able to get ourselves to and from work.

Mr_M's avatar

You can’t worry about making enemies if they’re going to be irrational about it and think that you have nothing better to do then be the girl’s transportation.

Here’s the rub, though. Do these people do YOU favors?

poofandmook's avatar

eh, not really. Every now and then we’ll buy each other lunch, but it doesn’t go much further than that.

Mr_M's avatar

Then have a list of excuses ready. And, as much as you’d like to be occasionally nice, in this situation you may not be able to. Then she’ll come to expect it.

stratman37's avatar

carpooling is rife with miscommunication, and give and take. You MUST be on good terms with the other party, or it turn ugly pretty fast. And if she can never reciprocate, don’t hesitate to ask for gas money.

windex's avatar

Get giant plastic bags filled with PINK packing peanuts and put them in the passenger seat

Get a language learning CD and repeat everything really loud the whole way

Ask her “so when are you going to buy a car” every single time you see her

Drive r….................e….................a….................l….................l….................y slow

Invite her to your place and don’t take her home until 1:24 AM

Ask her repeatedly if she wants to join your cult

Make multiple stops before dropping her off

Stop by a car dealership every time

Cut all the passenger seat belts

Get a Bike with 1 helmet

Drive Really Fast

say no

cantfoolthewise's avatar

I recommend not giving co-workers rides because once you say yes they will expect you to give them a ride; it is best not to start in first place. Remember co-workers are not your friends; you are in a business environment where personal does not mix with business. Remember a friend at work today is foe tomorrow.

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