General Question

honeybun35's avatar

What are some actions a man may take when he's interested in a woman?

Asked by honeybun35 (338points) 1 month ago

There’s a young man who all of a sudden is nice to an older lady he never paid any attention to. He has been watching this older lady a lot. He is a young minister. He ran out to ask her a question he could have asked inside.

When he was teaching a class he went by her to pass her the mic because he thought she had raised her hand. She didn’t even raise her hand it was an old lady on the opposite side of her table.

Observing members: 0 Composing members: 0

25 Answers

gorillapaws's avatar

If he were interested, I would expect him to express his interest to the older lady, minister or otherwise. It’s also possible that he is uncomfortable directly expressing interest because it’s inappropriate, he’s nervous, he’s awkward with women, etc.

lucillelucillelucille's avatar

First, he needs to get to an ophthalmologist.
My husband simply walked up to me and introduced himself.
I found out later that he told his friend that, “She will be mine!”
It turned out to be true so I think there was magic involved.
I should’ve known by the cape and top hat he had on.

honeybun35's avatar

Do you think he was just not paying attention and thought this woman raised her hand? This is a woman who has known him as a teen.

lucillelucillelucille's avatar

@honeybun35 -Maybe. Maybe he is too much of a puss and can’t directly ask her out.

Patty_Melt's avatar

If the woman has experienced some sad, or exhaustive, or other strenuous occurrences recently, he may simply have her on his mind about her welfare.
As a minister, he normally would want to help if something might be wrong. Even as a member of the community he might have concerns.
I just dont see anything you’ve described as amorous in the slightest.
Also, I see nothing wrong with a minister having such feelings, unless one or both of them is married currently.
In fact, someone else might have expressed concern to him about this woman, and requested him to keep an eye on her.

janbb's avatar

I think a minister is unlikely to be blatant about a crush on an older woman and my interpretation is more like @Patty_Melt ‘s. Perhaps he is see something that is making him feel more attentive to her needs right now.

Response moderated (Writing Standards)
janbb's avatar

@honeybun35 There’s very little point in parsing and trying to interpret someone’s every little action. That stuff got old when you left your teens. If the old woman is curious, she can ask the minister which would create much embarrassment for both. Or she can wait and see if a declaration is ever made.

Response moderated (Writing Standards)
Response moderated
Response moderated (Unhelpful)
Response moderated (Unhelpful)
ucme's avatar

Charisma & the ability to charm the birds out of the trees go a long way.
As does simply being yourself, I implemented all three & captured my wife’s heart.
Easy when you know how.

MrGrimm888's avatar

Many males, just don’t know how to communicate emotions. Or. They are afraid of rejection.

I personally have had a crush on several females. But. I didn’t want to make them feel awkward around me. So. I never said anything. I knew I liked them. But. Having them reject me, or feel weird around me, stopped me from trying to ask them out.

You never know, how they will react. I have had multiple experiences, where I ask them out, they go out with me, and then ghost me. Or. They turn out to be a train wreck, and then I’m bad at stopping the relationship.

I fall in love too easy, and often just get hurt…

I am an expert at reading people. But. Females, have a way, of messing up my instincts.
I often choose the wrong girl, and then, a whirlwind of problems begin.
As time has passed, I’ve grown to not trust myself. I’ve turned down far more females, than I’ve tried to get with.
I am completely confused, by the female mind. It makes me reluctant to even get involved with many.
So many have used me, or betrayed me. I just can’t trust them… That sucks. Because I have probably missed, some great opportunities.

I fear almost nothing, that walks or crawls this planet. I’ve been in extraordinary experiences, in SO many times. I’ve survived it all. But. Females, are the most dangerous things to me. I’d rather fight 10 men, than get my heart broken again. I am a very capable fighter, and my body heals rapidly. But. A woman can fuck me up, worse than anything… I have to protect myself. I can’t take much more, from them.

So. I have trouble with getting into relationships with them. After my ex, I’ve been with 4 girls, who ripped my heart out.

I wish I could forget the past. But… I can’t…

So…. It’s hard to find the courage to properly ask them out…

I’m only human. I definitely have attractions to them. But. I’m afraid of what they can do to me…..

Actions I take, are to be really nice to them, and eventually reveal that I like them. But. It’s difficult. I don’t want to be hurt, again.
I can’t speak for the Minister, or his feelings. It’s quite possible that he’s just keeping an eye on this woman. Trying to help her…

Just my thoughts. No merit, needs to be given them.

Response moderated (Unhelpful)
Response moderated
Response moderated (Unhelpful)
kritiper's avatar

More money in the plate!

honeybun35's avatar

Hawaii jealous of who and why? I don’t even think you know.

jca2's avatar

If this is going to be another time when the OP argues with everyone whose responses she doesn’t agree with, then it makes no sense for anyone to answer.

mazingerz88's avatar

Some actions. The man asks the woman to have coffee and conversation. Offers the woman a ride home if she needs it. And then repeats same gestures.

honeybun35's avatar

Would he follow her outside to ask a question about her situation if he was like a mentor?

rebbel's avatar

If he did that, then yes, he would.

Response moderated (Writing Standards)
Response moderated (Spam)

Answer this question

Login

or

Join

to answer.

This question is in the General Section. Responses must be helpful and on-topic.

Your answer will be saved while you login or join.

Have a question? Ask Fluther!

What do you know more about?
or
Knowledge Networking @ Fluther