Social Question

lucillelucillelucille's avatar

Do you often run into a waiter/waitress that comments on your menu choice?

Asked by lucillelucillelucille (34305points) March 4th, 2020

Or worse, comments on how little or much you ate?
Is it even normal to do that? I hardly think so but maybe I am wrong

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33 Answers

KNOWITALL's avatar

Of course they do and sometimes it’s cute and helpful, sometimes it’s annoying, like congratulations you picked my favorite. It amuses me.

Often we are asked if we’d like take home containers, but no, not comments on how little we ate, other than “could I bring you something else, or was that dish not to your taste?”, which is fine.
I order weird things off menu’s often, so if it’s a loser, it’s on me.

Demosthenes's avatar

Sometimes, in a positive sense. I’ve never come across a waiter deriding or belittling my choice and if they did I’d question why a person who needs tips to live would act like an asshole.

I don’t think I’ve had anyone comment on how much I ate other than the people I’m dining with. And that’s inevitable since I often can’t finish huge restaurant portions. (They also can’t help but comment on how slowly I eat!) :(

lucillelucillelucille's avatar

@KNOWITALL -I finished a dinner salad and the waitress said, “Good job!”
I thought my husband was going to burst out laughing.
When I looked at his face I almost lost it too. XD
After that, it wouldn’t have surprised me if she dabbed my mouth with a napkin and patted my ass on the way out. XD

lucillelucillelucille's avatar

@Demosthenes – My husband told me, “Good Job!” when I finished my second cup of coffee this morning.
If he oinks, I will fight him. XD

KNOWITALL's avatar

@Demosthenes Slow eaters run in my family, it’s actually a lot better for your body, so don’t feel bad about that please. My mom is the slowest eater on earth, too, I’ll be done and she’s on her third bite, but she’s a talker. haha!

@lucillelucillelucille Okay, that’s just weird. Was she older than you?

lucillelucillelucille's avatar

@KNOWITALL -Yep. I am just glad my sister wasn’t there. I’d never hear the end of it!
I give my hub another day for it to wear off ;D

zenvelo's avatar

I use to pick up a drink for my ex wife at an espresso place where I live. Most peopel would be getting the standard. My ex always wanted a “short cappuccino with 4 shots, foam only”.

One barista used to comment every time I ordered, something like, “four shots! that’s way too much!”

After many times doing this, one day I just said, “you are selling espresso shots, and I am buying them. Please stop with the comments.”

lucillelucillelucille's avatar

@zenvelo -What was her reaction?

zenvelo's avatar

@lucillelucillelucille She stopped making out loud comments, but made explicit physical comments, like shaking her head and rolling her eyes. I asked her to stop that too. She finally stopped after I spoke to the manager.

lucillelucillelucille's avatar

@zenvelo -Good for you! Why she’d even care is beyond me.

Dutchess_III's avatar

At this one cafe that we often go to for breakfast on Saturdays, one of the waitresses calls me “Two eggs over easy and toast girl.” She can’t believe that’s all I order.

lucillelucillelucille's avatar

@Dutchess_III That sounds like a common breakfast order.

Hawaii_Jake's avatar

I have a story to tell. I don’t often get to tell this. It is still an important memory for me.

I was in choir from as early as elementary school. By the time I got to high school, I was quite good. My voice changed late in my adolescence, so much to the delight of my high school choir master, I sang first tenor until I got to college. There was the side effect that having a high voice made me the butt of much ridicule. I was effeminate, so I was badly bullied as a child and adolescent.

One year in high school, the choir took a trip to Chicago. It was a very big deal. We raised money over the course of the school year for the trip. We got to see Rex Harrison perform in “My Fair Lady.”

As part of the trip, we were told we were going to eat at a very famous Chicago restaurant. I can’t exactly remember the name. I’m positive it started with a “B.” It may have been Berghoff’s, but I could be wrong. The restaurant was famous for having wait staff who had worked there for decades.

I was seated at a large table with a lot of other students when the waiter came to take our orders. I honestly didn’t know what to get. The others were placing their orders. I looked at the waiter and asked, “What do you recommend?” He looked at me and immediately said, “You’ve traveled. I can tell,” and made a recommendation. I was floored. For a boy from a small Oklahoma town who didn’t fit in with any group, his comment put me on cloud nine.

I still remember the paneled dining room. I remember the very long aprons the waiters wore.

I’ve had some recent family trauma, so it’s nice to remember something pleasant from that era. Thank you.

lucillelucillelucille's avatar

@Hawaii_Jake -Thank you for the story. He gave you a nice compliment.
I am thinking of how lucky you were to have seen My Fair Lady with none other than Rex Harrison! <3
The movie with him is my favorite
I hope things pick up for you soon:)

Hawaii_Jake's avatar

@lucillelucillelucille Thank you for this question. That memory is one of the few happy ones I have from that time.

Patty_Melt's avatar

@Hawaii_Jake, what a delicious story!
I am jealous. I would have loved to see that production. I have the movie on dvd, and I watch it at least twice a year. Rex live would have been such a treat.
You are fortunate to have such a cool memory to bring out and dust off whenever you wish.

Dutchess_lll's avatar

@lucillelucillelucille she’s used to people also ordering hasbrowns and bacon and pancakes and what ever, too. Not just 2 eggs and toast.

Patty_Melt's avatar

I haven’t had a restaurant waiter or waitress make such comments, but a guy in a food cart tried to resist my choice. I wanted a teriyaki chicken bowl, but I am allergic to onions. I could see the guy adding diced onions to the stir fry vegetables while I was in line. I asked him to do mine sans vegetables. Bless his heart. With an accent, this elderly man tried to advise a better health choice. “No vechable? You haffa have vechable. Vechable good for you.” I explained my allergy, and he finally relented.

KNOWITALL's avatar

@Hawaii Sorry for your troubles. Hugs.
I love your story, funny how strangers sometimes touch our souls and just walk away.

Tropical_Willie's avatar

We went to lunch today at a local bar and wings place. They make other things including great fried mozzarella and great marinara. We order that as an app and my wife order lasagna and I order a Philly cheese steak sandwich. Bartender was also covering the tables on the floor. No waitress. She liked our choices.

I preceded to get-up and napkins and flatware. While she turned the order into the kitchen, she came back and said you didn’t to do that. I said “You’re by yourself behind the bar.”
Time to leave; we have leftovers, I get to-go boxes and put our leftovers in a box. She smiles and says,” My mom does that kind of thing, she worked as a waitress !” I smile sign the receipt and give her a 18% tip. She did like the order we placed and she like not having to come out from behind the bar.

Food was great we will go again!

LadyMarissa's avatar

I’m a extremely slow eater & I often get “Don’t you like your meal?” from my server.Then they offer me a to go box. I’ve never had a server give me an “atta girl” for eating my meal!!!

Oh yes, I have had a few that commented “excellent choice, one of my favorites”, but that’s about it.

lucillelucillelucille's avatar

@LadyMarissa – I am still snickering about it. It could be worse.
I could’ve been scolded for not finishing my juice box. XD

Mimishu1995's avatar

No. In fact, it would be impolite for waiters/waitresses to comment on customers’ choice in my country. They only make comments if the choice is too outrageous, for example warning customers that the food is already spicy enough when they choose more chilly.

I may receive comments when I eat at small street stalls and when the sellers are much older than me. There is much less formality expected in street stalls and old people tend to be more talkative around younger people. Also I would have to be familiar with the sellers for some time. I don’t see anyone in bigger restaurants say anything to customers, and customers don’t make any comment to waiters/waitresses either. There is a level of professionalism to be maintain in restaurants.

lucillelucillelucille's avatar

@Mimishu1995 -I couldn’t agree with you more! :)

Jonsblond's avatar

I work in food service. We do this to make small talk. Some of us are good at it and some aren’t. It’s better than bringing up politics and everyone gets tired of talking about the weather. What else should we discuss?

Dutchess_III's avatar

It’s rude here too. But any more it seems like American’s don’t give a shit about what’s rude and what isn’t.

lucillelucillelucille's avatar

@Jonsblond -Yes, politics would be a bad choice.
I do get that a server would want to be friendly but ,“GOOD JOB!” is akin to calling someone a pig! lmao!
I wonder if she has ever said that to someone who is overweight?
Today at the hair salon, I asked the stylist if she ever had that happen.
Once she got done giggling, she said that just the other day, she, her S/O and his friend went out to lunch.
The friend finished a big lunch and the waitress congratulated him! XD
I wonder if there is anyone she wouldn’t say that to?

Jonsblond's avatar

Yeah, good job is a no no.

lucillelucillelucille's avatar

@Jonsblond- It could be worse I suppose.
Try “Good Job!” out & let me know what happens. XD

Dutchess_III's avatar

That would be such a freaking strange thing to say, like the person you’re waiting on is a little kid who is a picky eater. I guarantee you, if those servers have kids, and they treat them like that, the kids have eating issues.

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