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ragingloli's avatar

[NSFW] What legal repercussions would you face, if you went to the police station, and claimed (falsely), that you had a bag of cocaine lodged in your rectum, so you could get a free prostate massage?

Asked by ragingloli (46917points) 1 month ago

As asked.

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6 Answers

elbanditoroso's avatar

Aside from them falling over themselves laughing at you ..

Possibly “making a false report”, which is a misdemeanor ($1000 fine and up to a year in jail) where I live.

What kind of an ass would do this?

LuckyGuy's avatar

My prostate was removed. Does that mean I have more room for storage? I could be a Mule

stanleybmanly's avatar

Massage??? If you suppose a massage the likely outcome of such a confession, you are in for a rather enlightening disappointment.

gorillapaws's avatar

@stanleybmanly Has this right. There would be no massaging, and likely a trip to the hospital for a non-consentual, court-ordered colonoscopy.

LuckyGuy's avatar

@gorillapaws Would that count as my 5 year check-up exam? :-)

VicVic707's avatar

Why don’t you just go on Tinder, I’m sure you could find that help offered for free

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