General Question

crazyguy's avatar

How has your lovemaking changed over the years?

Asked by crazyguy (2014points) 1 month ago

I realize this question is very, very personal. That is why IO am going too answer it first.

This question is aimed at those among you who have been with the same sexual partner for at least 20 years. Singles can opt in about their relationships that lasted at least 10 years.

My wife and I have been married for 47 years+. Fortunately both of us are in good health and have remained sexually active. However, the sex has changed over the years. Lately, there is little or no vaginal penetration; we essentially masturbate mutually, usually when we shower together.

Now, it is your turn.

Observing members: 0 Composing members: 0

41 Answers

SergeantQueen's avatar

Still at it and kinkier than ever

lastexit's avatar

More uninhibited and imaginative than ever.

crazyguy's avatar

@SergeantQueen @lastexit I am hoping for a little more detail. Kinkier how? And uninhibited and imaginative in what ways?

Darth_Algar's avatar

You gotta pay $19.95/month to find that out.

SergeantQueen's avatar

Oh, I could get as detailed as you would like

panchin's avatar

Now I’m more interested in giving pleasure, not getting it!

LuckyGuy's avatar

Before, or after, I had my prostate removed?

gondwanalon's avatar

We’ve been married for 30 years and we’re both 69 (years old that is). I’ve never had a problem with having an erection. We have sex once a week. Nothing kinky. Usually starts out as a message as sort of a lead in. Pretty sure I have the ability to get it up 2 or 3 or more times a week.

Good health!

elbanditoroso's avatar

Before or after leaving the priesthood?

I have been divorced for decades, and haven’t found anyone I want to spend the rest of my life with. So not much to report in terms of changes.

FutureMemory's avatar

I’ve only had a few sexual partners in my life.

I was ‘programmed’ by my first girlfriend to associate sex with deep love, since we were head over heels for each other when she took my virginity. This programming has made it very difficult to enjoy sex with someone I’m not in love with – it has happened, but I found it extremely unsatisfying, to the point of feeling somewhat repulsed by the activity.

I guess I can’t really answer this question properly since I haven’t had a loving romantic relationship in over 20 years.

Nomore_lockout's avatar

I don’t kiss and tell. Never have and never will. What’s up with all the sexual innuendo in here lately?

SergeantQueen's avatar

Okay: here’s my serious answer. Used to be able to do casual encounters now I need it to be someone I am in a serious relationship with. That’s how i’ve changed

crazyguy's avatar

@SergeantQueen Any detail you care to provide will not offend me, personally. I cannot speak for anybody else. You know them better than I do.

@panchin That is a great answer. I get the same feeling. Sometimes I am happy just to help my partner orgasm even if I don’t.

@LuckyGuy My prostate has been somewhat enlarged for a few years now, but my doctor has not recommended its removal yet. Even if she did, I would probably decline anyways. I would be interested in your experience before and after.

@gondwanalon Has your sex life changed over the years? Other than the frequency of course.

@FutureMemory I tend to agree that love is becoming a prerequisite for me also. Sex without love feels like a chore not worth the effort.

@Nomore_lockout We are not asking for names and places

crazyguy's avatar

@SergeantQueen How about the sex itself? I have had zero casual sex in at least 20 years, so please focus on longer term relationships.

Nomore_lockout's avatar

@crazyguy Just as well, you’d never get it out of me anyway, some things are best savored privately.

Darth_Algar's avatar

@crazyguy

Dude, you’re getting kinda skeevy here with your requests for more detail (especially from a younger female member of the pool).

SergeantQueen's avatar

Lol Yeah, I mean that’s as much detail as I will provide. I was joking about giving more detail

Nomore_lockout's avatar

Ditto @Darth_Algar Agree with that a hundred per cent. I’m no Salem witch hunter but still…

FutureMemory's avatar

This question is very mild compared to others in Fluther’s past. I recall a very long thread with over 100 answers where people talked about their sexual fantasies, masturbation techniques, etc. This thread is like Sesame Street compared to that one. You purists need to chill a bit.

cookieman's avatar

^ Interestingly, some of my fantasies involve Sesame Street — or at least Muppets.

Nomore_lockout's avatar

Backing away, slowly…

crazyguy's avatar

@SergeantQueen Obviously some jellies know the individual posters a lot better than I do. I had no idea that you are a “younger female member” on this board. Like I said in the body of the question, I realize how personal this question is, and there is no intention of embarrassing anybody, especially among people who know you.

janbb's avatar

@crazyguy Just so you know for the future, questions that are about sex are usually labelled by the poster as NSFW before the question.

SergeantQueen's avatar

@crazyguy Just so you know, I am 20 years old. So you don’t need to worry about me being like a minor or anything stupid. I answered this question with a joke at first then revisited with a serious answer. I won’t get any more personal than that, as I got as detailed as you need for an answer. But I mean, You posted a question, people who are uncomfortable don’t need to answer. I don’t think you are a creep for posting this just maybe don’t keep asking for more details on it.

crazyguy's avatar

@SergeantQueen If you are just 20, I am certain your lovemaking hasn’t changed at all. So the question was not really intended for you.

gondwanalon's avatar

@crazyguy I’m pretty sure that my wife doesn’t get as much out of it nowadays. That’s the only change.

kritiper's avatar

What I used to do all night now takes me all night to do.

Response moderated (Spam)
JLoon's avatar

It’s more frequent and less complicated.

crazyguy's avatar

@JLoon Did you say more frequent? More power to you.

JLoon's avatar

@crazyguy – Yes. My theory is that eventually quantity = quality.

But it’s just a theory.

crazyguy's avatar

@JLoon I wish I could put this theory to the test!

JLoon's avatar

@crazyguy – Wishing is a good start ;D

crazyguy's avatar

@JLoon Wishing and dreaming, hopefully, will make it happen!

Nomore_lockout's avatar

Good grief it’s getting deep in here.

n6198c's avatar

Well, once you get in your seventies you just can’t seem to get it up anymore. And when your wife hits menopause she won’t have any more interest.

crazyguy's avatar

@Nomore_lockout Sorry to embarrass you. That shows you still got it!

@n6198c That is a good observation that probably applies to the majority of older people.

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