What should I do?
Asked by
Amy43 (
23
)
1 week ago
from iPhone
I’ve made some friends but for a year I’ve been lyin that I’m not a virgin. My real friends know I am and they are gona come stay with me for a while and I’m freaking out of both of them finding out the truth! Im sick of Lying.
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5 Answers
Why do you need to lie about not being a virgin?
Wait…your real friends know you are a virgin, but you’re afraid of them finding out the truth…? Don’t they know the truth?
Set them straight from the get-go if it bothers you so much. And resolve to never lie again.
If you’re worried it will become a topic of conversation: you could tell your newer friends the truth before your closer friends arrive, or you could ask your closer friends not to talk about/share your sexual activity. I don’t think it’s anything to hide or be embarrassed about. But if you’re not comfortable sharing this type of information with newer friends, you don’t have to—and you can explain to your closer friends that you’re not comfortable with others knowing this about you.
(In the future, too, you don’t have to lie if you’re not comfortable sharing—you can simply tell people, “I don’t kiss and tell,” or “I’m not comfortable talking about this.” Those would be true statements that maintain your privacy.)
In my opinion, outside of certain communities that I would tend to think are pathological, I would say that no one should worry about virginity, and anyone who makes someone else’s virginity their concern is a jerk who isn’t worth giving any thought to.
So what to do, is to stop worrying about it, and don’t be friends with anyone who tries to mess with you in any way that this would ever come up. Otherwise known as learning to have good boundaries.
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