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flutherother's avatar

What would you do if you had command of a zombie army?

Asked by flutherother (30695points) 1 week ago

Let’s say you can control an army of 100,000 of the undead by thought alone. What would you do? Order them to invade the White House, or send them to Iran. Could they be a force for good?

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10 Answers

Love_my_doggie's avatar

I hope my zombies are good at weeding and trenching garden beds, because my own are overgrown messes.

It’s not that I don’t enjoy everything about gardening. I simply don’t have any free hours during CPA Prime Time.

rebbel's avatar

I would make them go online, buy merch, put it on, and then let them blend in in a MAGA rally.

RedDeerGuy1's avatar

I would rent them out to the Amazon warehouse. For minimum wage. Or have them pick fruits and vegetables.

Caravanfan's avatar

I would use them to intimidate people into getting their COVID shot

Yellowdog's avatar

I’d get a gas mask and oxygen supply.

Imagine the stench of an army of putrid flesh…

filmfann's avatar

I would order them into a volcano.
An army of zombies, even if on my side, is terrifying, and they should be destroyed.

kritiper's avatar

Overrun Russia.

Mimishu1995's avatar

They could be a good resource for money making. They are dead, so they aren’t afflicted by the petty things the living are: fatigue, sleep deprivation… They eat brains, but it’s mostly for pleasure and not for combating hunger. So I can make them work as hard as I want to, and occasionally give out brains as rewards. Soon enough I’ll be rich :D

Zaku's avatar

It depends on their various qualities and weaknesses, probably particularly how stealthy and mobile they were, and where they started out.

If I can conjure them to appear anywhere, I’m sending them after megacorporate leadership, evil oligarchs, and/or whoever is doing damage to wildlife habitat and endangered species.

gorillapaws's avatar

I’d have them pick up trash, sort recycling and plant trees. I also might use them to fuck with my friends and family. My wife likes to jump scare me. I’m pretty sure my zombie army would permanently resolve that issue: Game, Set, Match Gorilla!

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