General Question

mowens's avatar

An ex wants to move in with me, how do i say no, and shut the hell up politely?

Asked by mowens (8392points) September 13th, 2008


Observing members: 0 Composing members: 0

21 Answers

iJimmy's avatar

Say “No, and shut the help up. Please.”

mowens's avatar

haha i still do want to be friends

jlm11f's avatar

How about “I don’t think that’s a good idea given our past relationship.”

iJimmy's avatar

Tell her some crap about you really needing to move on and need this time to be alone.

iJimmy's avatar

Or convince her your place is haunted. So she won’t want to move in.

mowens's avatar

All good plans. :)

autumn43's avatar

Say “How do I say this politely?.....Um, no.” And then tell her you have bed bugs.

mowens's avatar

Oooooh scabbies!

MarcIsMyHero's avatar

not sure of your past relationship but this worked for me once: I wryly told my ex that my unwanted late night sexual advances towards her might make her uncomfortable living with me. she told me to grow up and that was the end of the discussion. we are still friends.

robmandu's avatar

@MarcIsMyHero, that probably only works if the person with the residence is male. A female attempting that feint might find the ex amenable to the offer.

You know, because men are sluts like that.

Allie's avatar

How about you have to think of yourself first and you don’t think this would be right at this time.. or ever.

marinelife's avatar

It is best never to explain (It leaves the other free to argue with you if you do.). Simply say “I’m sorry that’s not possible.” If the ex says why, just repeat, “I’m sorry that’s not possible.” Smile and repeat. No one will persist past two or three tries.

cyndyh's avatar

“I think, emphatically, no!”

greylady's avatar

I think Marina is absolutely correct. No is an answer. It does not need any explanation, but requires a person to stand up on their own hind legs. It should be used more often, even.

XrayGirl's avatar

just say… any reasons you give will invite another excuse or assurance that your reason is not a problem for them…. You can just say no and still be practicing diplomacy. Have a plan, and an escape route so that it doesn’t have to be discussed at length. Stick to your guns!

mowens's avatar

BEcause I am a polite person!!!!!

I think it went well…. she dropped it for now.

Emilyy's avatar

How about, “This is my home, and I get final say on who moves in and out. Since I am living here, you are not. And that is how it’s gonna be. And we can still be friends, we just can’t be roommates.”

PredatorGanazX's avatar

Just politely tell her its over and done with. there is no use of you two being on the same roof if you are already done with the relationship.

let her know that you would like that to happen but its just not possible since its ex and stuff. Thats the polite way of saying it out and yet still retain the composure for not being rude and obnoxious.

My take on that is that part of you still wants her living with you but its time to jumpstart you life with a big change.

JohnRobert's avatar

Sounds like you want to be cordial about it, so try this light-hearted approach…

Her: “I want to move in”
You: “Do you think we get along well now?”
Her: “Yes”
You: “Me too… and I would really like to keep it that way! Let’s not mess this great thing up by moving in together.”

PredatorGanazX's avatar

Scripts from ” A walk to remember”

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