General Question

Jonsblond's avatar

Are you happy?

Asked by Jonsblond (7176points) February 6th, 2022 from iPhone


If not, what would make you so?

Observing members: 0 Composing members: 0

72 Answers

JLeslie's avatar

Not happy the last few days.

There’s a few things making me unhappy right now that I can’t shake easily.

I went along with a color for my driveway (we had it painted, it’s a thing where I live) and I am not happy at all with it. What makes me so upset about it is I knew it wasn’t right and still went along.

My folk dancing instructor is in hospice and her impending death has me quite melancholy.

My husband and I need a new house so badly. How we are living now is ruining us.

The last one, the house, is what could really be a game changer for me. The first one is objectively more trivial even though it really really bothers me. The second one I can’t do much about. The third one I’ve been in limbo for years regarding a house, and something has to be done.

SQUEEKY2's avatar

Marriage yes, health NO!
My Arthritis in my knees is getting worse and is really starting to affect my life.

Jonsblond's avatar

^Ugh, arthritis. I’m so sorry. I recently bought compression gloves for my hands. They help somewhat.

Pandora's avatar

Happy enough but no one is as happy as when they were a kid and ignorant of the world. I feel blessed and content with my own little world but I find it hard to ignore the fact that the world is made up of a ton of A holes. Sure there are some really good people, but not enough of them to blind me to the A holes. So the last time I remember being truly happy was when I was a kid ignorant of the A holes. I think that was 2nd grade or 3rd.

Oh, okay there was when I met my husband and married him and when I had my kids. Wait nope. I remember being happy to have my children and then sad that I bought them into such a A hole world. I never understood why people have to hurt others to feel better about themselves.

But I did always feel blessed for my friends and family and the many times I was spared and unfortunate possible outcome.
Now throw in bad knees and a bad back, not grateful for that but life could’ve been worse. So I’m grateful it’s not and my mind still works pretty well.

Nope it was 2nd grade. Evil nurse Ratched slapped 7 year old me when I was hospitalized after an appendix surgery because in my drug-induced sleep I soiled myself. That’s when I learned adults could not be trusted and could be evil.

Nomore_Tantrums's avatar

Pretty much yes. Life is never a bowl of cherries for any of us. But I don’t care for cherries anyhow, so what – me worry?

Nomore_Tantrums's avatar

Oh and a few million dollars wouldn’t hurt. Money can’t buy happiness, but it buys everything else.

cookieman's avatar

No and I’ve recently realized exactly how unhappy.

malcomkade's avatar

Sometimes I am. Drugs and alcohol help.

RedDeerGuy1's avatar

Yes. Most of my emotional and physical pain is gone.

Also I put more of my descretional money towards healthy food.

lute23's avatar

After seeing some unhappy people, I feel my self happy.

rebbel's avatar

Happy as fork.

janbb's avatar

At times. I am very sad about not being close to my kids but I am happy about my health and my art and my spiritual community.

Tad08g's avatar

I can’t say If I’m happy or not but if you want yourself to be happy then you have to do what makes you happy and you should do something for yourself to be happy.

basstrom188's avatar

Money may not buy you happiness but at least you can be miserable in comfort

flutherother's avatar

As a schoolkid I remember envying grown ups who could do what they liked when they liked and being able to buy as many sweets as I liked with no one to prevent or criticise me seemed like heaven.

Then I got a job and left home and had a great time as a single person but missed having that special partner beside me. Then I got married and had children and everything seemed rosy but I looked forward to the time when the kids wouldn’t tie us down so much and the mortgage was paid off and we would have the money to travel and really enjoy ourselves.

And now I am single and alone, healthy and financially secure yet I look back on each of these phases of my life with nostalgia.

jca2's avatar

@flutherother: When I look at photos of my daughter when she was little, I have such fond memories and she was so cute, but I remind myself that at the time, it was a lot of work and I was also stressed out with my job and trying to juggle parenting with working. She’s a teen now and I know when she’s out of the house in the future, I’ll look back on this time and the trips we took (and plan to take) and the things we do, and the help she gives me, and I’ll miss this, too.

Forever_Free's avatar

Absolutely. Thanks for asking!

mazingerz88's avatar

Happy, yes. Ecstatic, I can only wish.

janbb's avatar

@mazingerz88 I think “ecstatic” would be a hard state to maintain!

Poseidon's avatar

At this moment I am pretty happy because I have just introduced my new Hamster to his new home.

However, like I believe everyone has, we all have different emotions and we can’t always be happy or control them. We are not happy when someone dies are become ill, or if a loved one has a personal problem.

We all experience many different emotions and sometimes we can have different emotion on the same day.

rockfan's avatar

As an artist, my creativity is making me happy. But healthwise, I’m not too happy. Because of my bad posture while drawing, it caused a pinched nerve in my back, and since I didn’t realize how severe it was until just this month, it’s gotten pretty bad.

Demosthenes's avatar

More or less. I’m still in a “transitional” period in my life and I feel like once I get to the next step I might be a little more content and less apprehensive. I feel a bit “stuck” right now, even if things are generally going well. (I think the never-ending pandemic has contributed a bit to this feeling).

raum's avatar

My 12yo happens to be reading a book whose title answers this pretty well for me.

@rebbel Are forks happy?!

rebbel's avatar

@raum Yeah, as fuck.

Smashley's avatar

Happy comes and goes. I try to feel more or less content with the process of improving myself and the world a tiny bit at a time. I don’t strive for happiness moment to moment but on a general, existential level.

I haven’t left many things untried. I’ve done the most important things. I’m growing and sowing every day. I have hope for the future, respect for the past and compassion for everyone but scum sucking profiteers like tucker carlson.

SEKA's avatar

If I was any happier, I’d be twins! I am basically a happy person by nature. Yes, there are times that things happen that make me sad and there are times I’m thinking WTF were they thinking, still I do my best to remain happy

@Jonsblond Are you happy?

Inspired_2write's avatar

Happiness is short lived events in that whatever happiness that one received in theri life will fade until another happy event occurs. ( dependant on events,people,things to make one happy is not feasible to last.

I feel content in my life and do not dwell on superficial happiness which doesn’t last.

Contentment means that I am Ok with what I have and do not worry about what I do not have.

I am content ( satisfied) and relaxed in myself at this age in my long life and that I am greatful for.
In content with what you have in your life as that feeling is long lasting.

KNOWITALL's avatar

Not really much to be happy about right now.

Sorry @cookieman.

YARNLADY's avatar

I have everything I ever wanted and I know how to enjoy it. There are moments, now and then, when a situation comes up, but it always gets resolved.

SergeantQueen's avatar


What would make me happy? hmmm

What I want right now, is to not be scared of men. That would make me a bit happier. I met a guy, he’s super sweet. He wants to meet up, I want to meet up. But I am beyond scared. Scared I am going to get hurt again, scared I am going to mess it up.

I don’t rely on men to make me happy. But this distrust is causing me to not want to pursue people I like, and it’s making me sad. I want to be a normal 21 year old, who isn’t scared to love.

Other than that, I think getting rid of my anxiety and depression would make me happy lol. Permanently zap it out of my brain please.

Oh, and let me communicate like a normal human!

SergeantQueen's avatar

I may not be happy, but I am alive. That’s all one could ask for, right?

smudges's avatar

Imo, happiness is relative. It’s also fleeting. Have I ever been? Yes. It’s funny this question came up – talk about serendipity.

Just this morning as I was making my bed I said to myself, “So, if this is what your life will be from now on, could you handle it? Would you be ok with it? Could you live with it?”

And I answered, “Yeah. It’s not great, but I’m not having the highs and lows I’ve had in the past. Meds are working ok. And I’ve felt decent for about a year, give or take; and that’s a very long time for me. Yeah, it’s doable.”

Am I happy? Nope, but I don’t expect I’ll ever be, to be honest; not happy. I have no children, one sister, a couple of good acquaintances. I don’t expect love to just pop in. I live in an apartment rather than a nice house with an acre or two. Don’t live by an ocean. . . . now see? This is why I don’t think about whether I’m happy or not. I need to go back to thinking. . .“yeah, it’s doable.” ¯\(ツ) Whaddaya gonna do.

SergeantQueen's avatar

@smudges and that scares me to be honest. I always talk about how I want to be happy, that’s the number one thing I want in life. But the reality is, it is what you said. It’s fleeting. And Your answer to that question, that is actually exactly how I feel. I don’t feel like my life will ever be easy, but I am doing my best.

Sorry, I hope that wasn’t rude of me. I wasn’t trying to hijack your response or make it about me. It just resonated with me is all.

smudges's avatar

@SergeantQueen No, don’t apologize. I like to let people know when something resonates with me, too.

The thing is, and I hope this is encouraging, you have so much time, even though I’m sure it feels like you have to do this and that and get things done so you can begin living. That’s how I felt anyway. Once I do this and that and the other. . .then I can begin my life. But I ended up being so busy making plans and trying to live, that I missed out on a lot and made soooo many bad choices. As the quote says, “Life isn’t a dress rehearsal.” Every decision you make starts you on a path, and sometimes once you’re on one path, you can’t change your mind and choose another, or at least not easily.

If you have any addiction in your family tree, you might want to rethink consuming any drugs/alcohol, because that screwed me up even more that the bipolar disorder and major depression.

I don’t feel like my life will ever be easy, but I am doing my best.

Then you’re doing great! Not many people’s lives are easy. But I know what you mean. My best advice is stay away from chemicals, and shoot for contented. Contentment is kind of like a soft fluffy cloud to lay on.

SergeantQueen's avatar

Yeah, I am not doing so great with alcohol consumption right now. I am really struggling with it and I kind of hate myself, I told myself I wouldn’t do this. But I am.

I do feel that way. “once I get a car or move out, then I’ll be better.” It’s hard to slow down and just live.

Thank you so much @smudges I appreciate you.

Response moderated (Spam)
Response moderated (Writing Standards)
Blackwater_Park's avatar

I’m content with what I have and the way things are presently. Life is a little unsettled right now though. I could use some more down time, perhaps a vacation. Winter blues (more like blah than sad) are hitting me hard this year but that always lifts in the spring.

snowberry's avatar

There’s a difference between happiness and joy. I’m not always happy, but I do have joy all the time. Happiness is transitory.

HP's avatar

That word “happy” has been tricky for me since I was a little boy gazing at the character in Disney’s Snow White. Happy to me implies giddy feelings devoid of intellect. Like @Blackwater Park above, I am grateful to find myself content. And I am surprised to discover that I have never been so content as when covid convinced me to abandon the rat race.

jca2's avatar

I’m happy to be retired, in good health, financially ok, although not affluent by any means. Things could be better, of course (bigger house or does someone want to come re-do my living room for me, because doing it might give me a nervous breakdown). Just having a lot of free time every day without the stress of working is making me happy.

LadyMarissa's avatar

My way of surviving my day is…IF I can control the problem, I do my best to fix it. IF I have NO control over the problem, I don’t stress over things of which I have NO control. That way I manage to remain a fairly chill person!!!

LadyMarissa's avatar

@rebbel Thank you!!! Remember that I grew up in the era where the rule of the day was “Don’t sweat the petty stuff & don’t pet the sweaty stuff.” It has served me well!!! ;}

KRD's avatar

I’m happy right now.

Dutchess_III's avatar

Yeah. Wishing more progress was being made on the house, though.

Kraigmo's avatar

I am not happy upon waking up.
But if I get to go hiking, picnicking, or to a concert, those things always make me very happy.
What’s one thing that would make me happier in normal life?
The Reform, Evolution, or Disappearance of every single human on the planet who has no or very little intellectual capacity. (Children and retarded people excepted).
Slow drivers, conspiracy theorists, political loyalists, people with cognitive dissonance, or denial, about anything, etc.

cookieman's avatar

^^ So…you’re like an elitist Thanos.

jca2's avatar

What I think will make me happier is if my living room were already transformed (instead of all the work that’s ahead with me painting it, putting in new furniture, hanging pictures, etc.), and I could just sit in there and watch TV and do some coloring or art projects. Let me get my magic wand out now…..

Jonsblond's avatar

I am. Thank you for asking @SEKA. It’s why I asked this question. I was enjoying my happiness so I thought I’d ask. My happiness has been a long time coming. It only took me 50 years. ;)

cookieman's avatar

^ Congratulations @Jonsblond. You certainly deserve it.

Dutchess_III's avatar

I almost have a real bathroom!

LadyMarissa's avatar

@Jonsblond Glad you’ve reached your place of peace!!! It took me 53 years to find mine, but it appears I will spend my final years happier than I’ve ever been!!! May you be blessed with the SAME fate!!!

KRD's avatar

You almost have a real bathroom @Dutchess_III? Don’t you all ready have a real bathroom?

Dutchess_III's avatar

This house is gutted.

KRD's avatar

@Dutchess_III. That makes scene.
—hoping it gets fixed soon!—

Dutchess_III's avatar

Getting there. Slowly but surely. Bathroom first.
Today we bought a new front door and a new window for the loving room.

janbb's avatar

@Dutchess_III You have a “loving” room?

mazingerz88's avatar

Without love, it’s not a living room.

Forever_Free's avatar

If only walls could talk.

mazingerz88's avatar

^^And floors.

Dutchess_III's avatar

“Living room.” You know how wonky the word corrector thing is @janbb. I don’t always catch it.

Response moderated (Spam)
KRD's avatar

@Dutchess_III those word correcters can be bad sometimes.

Dutchess_III's avatar

Really bad @KRD. It’s like “The word YOU chose makes NO SENSE in context of the sentence!”
And then, if you don’t catch it, it makes you look stupid.

janbb's avatar

@Dutchess_III I’m sorry. It did make sense but I was just doing a little tease at your expense.

smudges's avatar

I like what @mazingerz88 said: Without love, it’s not a living room.

Sometimes word correctors are right on. ;o)

KRD's avatar

Sorry about my last response @Dutchess_III.

Dutchess_III's avatar

You guys are making me laugh and this is in GENERAL. Laughing is not allowed in General.

Answer this question




to answer.

This question is in the General Section. Responses must be helpful and on-topic.

Your answer will be saved while you login or join.

Have a question? Ask Fluther!

What do you know more about?
Knowledge Networking @ Fluther