General Question

lilydaneloise's avatar

Feelings for a married man?

Asked by lilydaneloise (14points) 4 days ago

I have been texting a married man for 2 months now. Lately we have been texting daily but have not met. He flirts with me everyday but posts pictures of his wife and kids online. He even shared a picture of his kids with me recently. I felt hurt but didn’t tell him. He still texts me and wants to meet me. He appears a little jealous when I turn to someone else with my problems instead of him. I posted a picture of a guy friend 4 days ago, and since then this married man has ghosted me. Is it the picture of another guy (weird because he posts pictures of his family) or did he find out something about me that he dislikes? Can’t help but feel a little paranoid. Help!

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16 Answers

Pandora's avatar

If he hasn’t met you in 2 months and has been sending you pictures of his family and kids then he only had intentions of just flirting or the whole family thing is fake. Could also be possible he knows the guy or his wife found out he was texting you and read the texts. So many reasons exist as to why he ghosted you.

By the way, I doubt he was jealous about you going to other people with your problems. He was trying to isolate you so you would be easier to manipulate and probably hit up for money. He figured you were desperate for a man in your life since he was able to prove that by sending you pictures of his “so call family”, and you didn’t react.

Stop being desperate. Don’t ever date married men. A quality person who has ever had any kind of real love or respect for their partner would divorce first instead of trying to step out on the person.
But to answer your question I think he ghosted you because he’s trying to see if you are desperate enough to drop your new friends so he knows he has a good grip on you and there is nothing you won’t do for him. So he knows if he caught a big sucker fish. I think you should block his calls. I don’t trust people who try to isolate others. This is usually a clear sign that they have bad intentions.

janbb's avatar

It was never going to go anywhere good anyway. Keep on moving and don’t waste time thinking about this married man.

elbanditoroso's avatar

It was a mistake to start anything with him, and it is a good thing he ghosted you. Nothing positive was ever going to happen.

Move on.

seawulf575's avatar

It sounds like he isn’t ready to end his marriage which means he is just looking to see if he is still attractive to the opposite sex. That ends with you wasting a lot of time and ending up realizing it. Move on.

When I met my wife and we started dating, she was still married. But almost a year before, her (now ex) had walked out and was living with a new woman. There really wasn’t any chance of it resurrecting so it was much safer.

Jeruba's avatar

The guy is emotionally cheating on his wife, and sounds willing to go further, but he expects his lover to be faithful.

Maybe his wife found out something about him that she dislikes, and now he is on the spot.

You got off easy. Keep going and don’t look back.

chyna's avatar

Maybe he’s just playing games with you and will contact you soon. Or his wife caught him, or he has moved on to another woman to flirt with. None of us could ever know, but i think this is your time to move on to an attainable relationship.
Good luck!

RedDeerGuy1's avatar

There is no guarantee that he is whom he says he is. He could be a ten year old boy with a cell phone. Or a scammer wanting your money.

There are lots of available men who are marriage material. I would suggest a dating club. Or to a professional match maker. Or online dating site. Or even ask friends and family to help match you.

I agree with @Jeruba that you got off easy.

Samantha4One's avatar

A big no for this guy. The last thing you wanna be called is a home wrecker, so forget about this guy and move on. It’s a good thing that the guy ghosted you first. Maybe he realised his mistake.

jca2's avatar

Since he ghosted you, it’s best you try to get over your adoration of him and move on. It doesn’t matter if you like him or not if he’s not in touch with you.

nikipedia's avatar

Married men who are unfaithful to their wives are often narcissists. Consider this a bullet dodged and move on with your life. Find a good man who will make you his first priority.

gorillapaws's avatar

Don’t fall for married men. It’s taboo for multiple reasons.The most obvious is you’re potentially ruining a family and the lives of his kids. The other important point is that all married men willing to cheat/ruin their families are by definition pieces of shit. So you’ve narrowed your dating pool to shitheads…not a wise move.

Stick to single men who want to love and respect you, and if that doesn’t sound appealing, then you should probably look into getting some professional help to recalibrate what a desirable partner looks like.

flutherother's avatar

Once you step into the world of relationship cheats you cannot trust anyone any more. The best thing you can do is to move on and forget him.

SnipSnip's avatar

Good grief. Please find someone who is available. Have a little respect….for yourself.

LadyMarissa's avatar

He’s jealous that you dare to have another man in your life!!! I say let HIM deal with his emotions. Anyway, getting involved with a married man is the LAST thing that you should do!!! IF he’ll cheat on her, he’ll cheat on YOU!!! The reality is that he’s already cheating ON YOU with his wife & you haven’t even met him yet!!! He wants to keep his family because he loves ALL of them (including the wife) & he wants you to sit at home like a good little girl UNTIL he feels the need for some attention…then you’re supposed to sexually satisfy him or any other emotional need he might have at the time while he does NOTHING to take care of your needs!!!

CUT YOUR LOSSES NOW by forgetting him NOW & building a REAL relationship with a guy who IS THERE FOR YOU!!!

seawulf575's avatar

@gorillapaws makes many good points but just a clarifier…there are plenty of single guys that are pieces of shit too. But when I got divorced, I got a piece of advice that applies to divorced people or single people. If not sure what you want, or if in doubt, go on as many dates with as many different kinds of guys as you can. Don’t limit yourself to education or looks or height or anything like that. Just go on the dates. They are dates, not commitments to a long term thing. If you don’t have chemistry with a guy, move on. You might find that you are drawn to something you never considered before.

But set your standards and don’t compromise on them.

Forever_Free's avatar

Turn. Run as fast as you can from him. Don’t look back for a second.

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