General Question

raum's avatar

What should I do with baby photos of an old ex?

Asked by raum (11271points) 1 month ago from iPhone

I don’t want to keep them. But as a parent, I’d feel bad just tossing them. Though is it kind of weird to just mail them back to their parents’ house? (Assuming they haven’t moved.)

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27 Answers

Zaku's avatar

I’d give them back to the parents. Maybe check if they’re still there first, though the post office and/or new residents tend to catch such things, especially if the envelope seems like something of personal substance.

janbb's avatar

I would throw them out and assume that the parents already have baby pictures of the ex.

Hawaii_Jake's avatar

I agree with @janbb. I would throw them away.

LadyMarissa's avatar

I’d verify the parents’ address & then return the pics to the parents. Even IF they also have a copy, I doubt that they’d want them thrown away…Mothers are funny like that!!! They may want to return them to your ex.

flutherother's avatar

Another vote for throwing them out. If your old ex wanted them, she would have taken them. I’m sure her parents will have copies.

gorillapaws's avatar

I’d send them back.

cookieman's avatar

Not the same situation, but a few years after my mother disappeared from my life, I found that I had a box full of photos of her and my dad from when they were teenagers.

I simply mailed it back to her last known address and hoped for the best.

Just because she was a jerk doesn’t mean I have to be.

si3tech's avatar

I’d send to his parents.

janbb's avatar

They were given to you how many years ago? Why stir up anything years after the fact? I still say dump them.

Pied_Pfeffer's avatar

Why not send them to the ex? Isn’t that how you came to possess them in the first place? Look at it this way…if your ex had your baby photos, would you prefer that they be given to you or your parents?

Brian1946's avatar

Post them on his Facebook page and demand a ransom! ;p

longgone's avatar

No, please don’t throw them out. My aunt was in a relationship with a very creepy guy once – he burned all her childhood pictures. It was a huge loss, so I really appreciate how important pictures are, now. Don’t assume your ex has duplicates. Things happen. You know…floods, fires, freaks.

Samantha4One's avatar

Well it’s up to you whether you wanna keep them or burn them or send them away. I feel that sending them back may shake some things. But yes it’s the right thing to send them back to where they belongs.

seawulf575's avatar

Do you like the ex? If so, ask if they want them back. If you want nothing to do with the ex, toss ‘em. They didn’t care enough about them than to leave them behind.

Patty_Melt's avatar

When I split with my first husband we each kept some pictures. Years later, I got to finally meet his parents. It was after we divorced. I also met a woman he lived with a while before marrying someone else. He had left his pictures of us behind. She kept them thinking she would have a chance to give them to me sometime. I was glad to get them.

Send them to the parents.

janbb's avatar

Answers are all over the map so I guess the best thing is to do what feels best to you. No right or wrong in this case.

raum's avatar

Ack…thanks for all of your answers.

I definitely don’t want to stir anything up. It’s been over twenty-five years. And I don’t even know if they’re married. Nor do I care to know. But at the same time, I don’t want to start some needless drama.

On the other hand, as a parent, baby photos are so precious. Especially back in the day with photos developed from film. I have thousands of photos of my kids on my phone and still think they’re precious because that time has gone. Those chubby cheeks and tiny fingers in a captured image.

I don’t hate them. But I’m also don’t care to have anything to do with them either.

Ugh…my brain reads like these comments. All over the place. Will simmer a bit more over the weekend. :/

kritiper's avatar

Mail them back if you can. You don’t have to give your return address.

raum's avatar

@kritiper I think this is what I’m leaning towards. Just send them. No return address. No note.

cookieman's avatar

^^ Agreed.

Six's avatar

So just be “kind of weird.”

Brian1946's avatar

@raum

“Ugh…my brain reads like these comments. All over the place.”

At least you can toss mine into your favorite chasm of non-remembrance!

Inspired_2write's avatar

I had a folder that had a Family Reunion studio portrait that my ex’s sister sent him but he forgot to send it back as it was the only one that that family had.

It was important so when I discovered tht my Ex had passed away ( 2015) I mailed the folder of all of his photographs plus that Portrait so that his children may have them .

I simply mailed to the Library in his home Town explaining to locate that family ( I gave names) and check if they might want them.

By NOT giving the exes family closure and his children and so on one hurts his whole family, best to give it and feel better for doing the right thing.

raum's avatar

@Inspired_2write I have never heard of mailing something to the local library before. How interesting.

janbb's avatar

@raum FWIW, it’s doubtful to me that any library in the States would consider that part of their function.

raum's avatar

@janbb Ha! I was about to PM you to ask.

Inspired_2write's avatar

@raum It worked in the end as the libray got ahold of a Genealogy group in that area and got in touch with the surviving relatives.

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