Social Question

janbb's avatar

What do you think about old men, usually celebrities, fathering children?

Asked by janbb (62549points) June 2nd, 2023

Al Pacino has impregnated his 29 year old GF at 83. Robert De Niro fathered a child last year at 79 and congratulated Pacino yesterday.

Is this something to celebrate? Are we congratulating old men for their supposed virility? What about the children who will grow up without a father for most of their lives?

I find something kind of squicky about all this. Your thoughts?

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38 Answers

Acrylic's avatar

It’s a shame the child will grow up without a proper father figure. Seems guys like that are selfish in that way, getting their pleasure not caring about the future of this child. Sure, he can leave the kid millions, but that doesn’t replace dad.

Hawaii_Jake's avatar

I think it’s fine. There are now on this planet probably hundreds of millions of people walking and talking and doing life who did not grow up with a father figure in the house. It is quite possible to understand the role of a father without an actual one in the house.

SQUEEKY2's avatar

I don’t have any thoughts on it, the kids won’t suffer financially once dear old Dad is gone,most young fathers are so busy with work and trying to support their family they don’t see much of them anyway.

NoMore's avatar

Don’t bring a child in to the world if you can’t be there for them. It’s not about your virility, it’s about your family.

seawulf575's avatar

It’s a waste of time. I applaud him for having the energy, but really he isn’t going to get to enjoy the child, the child will not grow up knowing him. If he lives another 10 years, the child is going to be thinking its his grandfather or something.

Hawaii_Jake's avatar

We are ignoring the mothers. I am certain the mothers desired to have a child. I am equally certain they love these older men. They want to bring a new life into the world. That’s a beautiful thing.

ragingloli's avatar

There is something deeply disturbing about old men impregnating women that are young enough to be their actual daughters. Grand-daughters, even.

KNOWITALL's avatar

I think it’s gross and selfish but celebs are a different breed.

SQUEEKY2's avatar

What is selfish about it?
The women are of legal age ,and probably love the old dude or at least his fortune ,and what is it more than half of marriages end in divorce meaning one parent won’t be present very much?
Isn’t that selfish also?
These children will be well looked after even if dad is gone in the next ten to fifteen years.

flutherother's avatar

It’s yucky. It’s an unnatural distortion of the beautiful thing that is the family.

KNOWITALL's avatar

@SQUEEKY2 Probably because I love psychology and studied about fatherless children and the effect on those children. It’s not good. Money doesn’t solve everything, statistically those children are high risk.

canidmajor's avatar

I think that it is irresponsible to impregnate a person with sperm that is likely seriously sub-par because of the advanced age of the producer.

”Older paternal age may be harmful to the offspring’s health in terms of genetic mutations, telomere length, and epigenetics [66]. Several lines of evidence suggest that epigenetic changes occur in the sperm of older fathers, particularly defects in DNA methylation [67–69].

”Older fathers have less antioxidant capacity, and environmental risk factors which may lead to new mutations and DNA damage in some key DNAs related to fetal development.”

From this:,methylation%20%5B67–69%5D.

jca2's avatar

I believe Tony Randall also had a child when he was quite elderly.

I think it’s kind of odd, but I do think these children aren’t at risk the way a poor child who is with a struggling single parent might be, one who can’t pay the bills and suffers from the stressors of every day living, like needing to find an apartment or a decent car or what have you.

These children are the mega rich, and will have their mothers and nannies and baby nurses and all kinds of people looking after them. It doesn’t mean they’re guaranteed to be happy, as nobody is guaranteed to be happy, but I don’t think I would look at them as statistically “at risk” the way I would look at one of my CPS clients. I’d say some of the CPS clients with two parents (mom and dad) are more at risk then the son or daughter of Al Pacino or Robert DeNiro.

I don’t know how hands on someone like Robert DeNiro or Al Pacino will be, but that’s ok, if the mother is competent and she has great help, that’s very useful. They’ll probably have a baby nurse come in for a few weeks to look after the baby and then a nanny for play dates and stuff, and a maid or two to cook and clean. They’ll be ok. Like I said, it’s not a guarantee of happiness but it’s not like they’ll be struggling for anything, either.

Smashley's avatar

@canidmajor – should sperm health be analyzed before one is allowed to procreate? This sounds deeply ableist.

canidmajor's avatar

@Smashley Call it what you will, I think it is irresponsible. It might be classified as vaguely ableist, but “deeply” is a bit of an extreme designation.

You might want to look at some of the other dissenters on this thread, as well, I am not the only one objecting.

SQUEEKY2's avatar

Is this really for anyone to question?
As long as everyone was of legal age,why does it matter?

MrGrimm888's avatar

I find it quite telling, reading the contributions to this thread, of the audacity and hypocrisy of some… It’s a beautiful thing. Seeing people out themselves…

If I started a thread about gold digging women trying to guarantee lifelong wealth, through an act of practical prostitution, I doubt the reactions would be similarly discussed with such acceptance… I would be getting nailed to a cross…

@Hawaii_Jake hits it right on the head. It is a great thing.

Life and death have a relationship. As with all things that are opposite. Is there not enough loss of life?...

Are we really in a time, when women are not celebrating a new life?
New life means new hope.
New hope that this world can be a better place…
I find the ones casting aspersions on this “phenomenon” appalling. Well. More like sad...

Old/young pairings, are definitely worthy of some raised eyebrows. But. The entire structure of this thread is a shameful example of sexist, one sided, obtuse thinking.
Well done…Golf clap.~....

canidmajor's avatar

OK, all you outraged ones at those of us who aren’t fully supportive, do you really think it’s fine to conceive children that you know you won’t be around to raise? And yeah, I know that anything could happen, anybody could die at any time, but statistically, a man who conceives a child at 83 won’t be around to see them reach double digits, and won’t be involved and engaged much.
And please, don’t pull out the old “but the kid will have money so they’ll be fine” thing. That actually doesn’t solve the problem.

seawulf575's avatar

^^Nope. I’m too responsible for that. Conceiving a child that someone else will have to raise is not responsible.

canidmajor's avatar

I just read that Pacino is demanding a paternity test. That will make a couple of people here very happy to think that their basic distrust of women seems to be justified.

seawulf575's avatar

@canidmajor He’s 83 and she’s 29. Infidelity is a distinct possibility. I’m pretty sure at 83 he doesn’t have sex as often as he did in his youth. He might have a distinct reason for doubting the paternity of the child.

jca2's avatar

I just googled it and he requested the paternity test and the mother of the baby agreed and it was found to be his child. I read that he requested it when she was 8 months pregnant.

canidmajor's avatar

@seawulf575 I think it is notable that we agree on the issue of responsibility. :-)

@jca2, thanks for the update, I hadn’t seen that.

KNOWITALL's avatar

@canidmajor It’s also just sad. You’ll never convince me many of these matches would happen minus the money. I see those women as predators on the elderly personally.

@MrGrimm888 I get that men feel flattered, I just don’t think it’s usually real love and affection.

janbb's avatar

@KNOWITALL I actually see it more as the older men preying on the younger women.

jca2's avatar

I always viewed it as a trade-off. The woman, presumably beautiful, gets taken care of, doesn’t have to work any more, lives a life of luxury. She travels to luxurious resorts, drives around in fancy cars, lives in great places. The man, a geezer, gets a woman who is arm candy, which is prestigious for him. He has to pay for it all. A trade off. It’s not an arrangement that would suit everyone. It’s not an arrangement that everyone would want or could tolerate. Maybe the wife can’t stand him but it is what it is. Maybe they both nurture each other.

KNOWITALL's avatar

@janbb and @jca2 It could be any scenario. Logically I realize that.

My grandpa was pretty popular after grandma died and while he was in hospital, his girlfriend had his debit card and new car and had almost cleaned him out-he was well off. My uncle had to confront her, grandpa cried, I almost lost it seeing my papaw hurt close to death when I told him.
The older I get, the less optimistic I am about people and their motivations, sadly.

janbb's avatar

To all who say what does it matter? It doesn’t matter at all in the scheme of things. (I rarely ask questions here that are very close to my heart.) I just found something icky in the self-congratulatory article I read as if putting your sperm in a woman was a big deal when it’s the birthing and the parenting that demand the real work. Just my two cents.

raum's avatar

How did the article frame it? Were they congratulating them on knocking them up? Or congratulating them on becoming a father? How it’s framed would probably affect my opinion.

raum's avatar

Just read it!

Sounds kind of like he’s excited that someone is in the same boat as him. Must be kind of intimidating becoming a father again at that age.

Also read it as his memory isn’t too great. I wonder if anyone pointed it out to him that the baby wasn’t actually born yet. :P

Smashley's avatar

@canidmajor – the others weren’t giving a judgement based on potential genetic outcomes. That’s where you got gross.

MrGrimm888's avatar

Ok. Ok. Ok…..

I just did the briefest of research (I know, right?)

Pacino, and his chick? Lol!....

Can we first be happy for AL?


None of us are seriously going to see this intelligent, beautiful (seriously,) girl as being genuinely interested in Al…Right? No confusion? Shouldn’t be…

Or the girl is a tad unusual, and it could be worse…

Obvious gender bias, on both sides…

Article I read about Al, he didn’t think he could get her “pregers.” (Intentions?)...

I don’t know these people personally. It’s really not my business. Sexist remarks aside. These two people are probably pretty aware of perception of their relationship. Publicly…
And… They clearly acknowledge the situation, and differences in their likely very different agendas.

This relationship, is no different than any other. Two human beings couple for each other’s needs. It’s hard/not our place to judge either person for it…

I certainly cannot throw stones in the house of sexual indiscretion. I can’t speak for all of us….....

Yeah. It’s weird… It’s a crazy world. This type of thing….. Is only as angelic as the situation is allowed by it’s peers/society to be… Our stars reflect our society, and it’s agreed upon terms. My position is that this is a thing, because this is our thing...

And the most important thing is that we not judge these new lives, as something we disapprove of. These children are likely to have just as good of a shot at living long/happy lives, comparable as the rest of us…

janbb's avatar


janbb's avatar

Turning it around and casting out the pregnancy issue, how about an 83 year old woman in a relationship or just having sex with a 29 year old man? Does that change things?

jca2's avatar

@janbb that’s sa great question amd may be worthy of a new q, in case anybody is no longer following. Just a suggestion.

janbb's avatar

^^ Yes, I think I’ll post it. Thanks.

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