General Question

janbb's avatar

Should the term "cross dressing" be abandoned as outdated? (Read details)

Asked by janbb (63154points) 2 weeks ago

I see men in fashion magazines in skirts and dresses and the husband of a local singer wears vintage dresses with his Doc Martins. I’m just wondering if it would be freer if we abandoned the concepts of women’s and men’s clothing and let people dress however they want. Would this have an impact on lessening gender defined roles?

I am labeling this “NPP” and any discussions of political parties or left or right will be flagged.

Observing members: 0 Composing members: 0

26 Answers

canidmajor's avatar

Yes, it should. Along with “transvestite” and other terms that carry a negative stigma about such things.

Hawaii_Jake's avatar

I would like to get rid of the labels of men’s and women’s clothes. The sooner we end the binary tyranny, the quicker we can get to a more sane society.

JLeslie's avatar

Just curious after the two answers above, what about the term Drag Queens? Many men who dress use the term themselves.

Hawaii_Jake's avatar

In a society where anyone is accepted for wearing anything they want without regard to oppressive norms, drag will enlarge and be more performance art accompanied by fabulous costumes.

Historically, drag has been a way for some gay men to express their femininity. It was born in eras that repressed women and effeminate men.

JeSuisRickSpringfield's avatar

Honestly, I never hear the term anymore in person. But yes, I do think it’s outdated. Clothes don’t have a gender. As Eddie Izzard said: “They’re not women’s clothes, they’re my clothes. I bought them.”

smudges's avatar

Yes, it’s outdated. Even clothes manufacturers are directing ads for a piece of clothing to nonbinary people and showing ads of nonbinary people wearing them. Personally, I love it. Be whomever you feel. I can’t wait until it accepted. It’s exciting!

SnipSnip's avatar

No. If you don’t like the term, don’t use it. If you don’t like others to use it, that is a personal problem.

SQUEEKY2's avatar

Personally I wouldn’t wear clothes like that but if others want whatever fills your boots type thing.

JLeslie's avatar

We love Eddie Izzard, thank you for mentioning him, I have not watched him in a long time. He’s so funny.

I would use whatever words made people comfortable, but I do think there is a difference between transgender and cross dressers for lack of a better word. I don’t like the idea of labeling everyone who “cross dresses” as trans.

I like more fluidity in what people want to wear and less definition of what is male and what is female, but I also have some problems with it too if I am honest, but the problems would be on the fringe of the issue, and we can’t decide things like this based on the fringes.

I find it ironic that some people involved in the LGBTQ+ community (including straight people in the community) or maybe it is the medical and psych professionals, seem to be coming up with more and more terms to identify every little difference regarding what type of gender and sexuality preference people are, to now say we should have less vocabulary or fewer rules regarding clothing. I would say clothing is different than gender and sexual orientation, but all of these different topics intersect. It would not be uncommon that the medical field might have some very specific or elaborate terms, but it seems it is expected that the general population know all of the terms too or people get offended. That can be a set up for harming people not helping.

If I understand correctly, the jellies are saying if a boy wants to wear a dress, a dress should be acceptable male clothing. Is that correct? He is still a male, he is not trans anything, it is just a fashion choice. Please correct me if I am wrong.

People should be able to wear whatever they want and not be stereotyped or labeled, but also people need to be appropriate in some specific environments. This goes for everyone, straight or not. That is mostly about making others comfortable, and I think that should be part of the consideration. This of course can sometimes be too rigid, but I am just saying we don’t only dress for ourselves, we also dress for situations.

I worked in fashion for many years and skirts for men have been around, so that is not in any way new or shocking to me.

Kraigmo's avatar

“Crossdressing” is an actual fetish for some people.
Crossdressers are NOT transgender. Transgender people don’t get a sexual thrill from their clothes.
If none of us had any programmed “knowledge” of “feminine clothing vs. masculine clothing”... I’m not sure what they’d end up wearing. But the fetish would remain and still manifest itself somehow.

Dutchess_III's avatar

I find it interesting that women don’t get that lable.

Hawaii_Jake's avatar

@JLeslie one little point: there are no straight people in the LGBTQ community. By definition, it’s everything other than straight.

I’m glad you like Suzy Izzard. She came out as transgender. I think that was last year. She’s very happy and it’s still performing.

I think you understand it correctly. Not all people who wear clothing commonly identified as belonging to a gender they were not assigned at birth are transgender.

Hawaii_Jake's avatar

^typo. It should say she’s happy and is still performing.

JLeslie's avatar

@Hawaii_Jake Their family, friends, and loved ones are in the community, or at minimum adjacent to the community. They are certainly involved and care about the community, and what affects their loved ones affects them too. So, what do we call someone who dresses in drag, to the hilt? I want to make sure I am learning the right lingo. They aren’t dressing as women now, they are just actors in costume? Let’s take RuPaul. I still see him as a he, and from what I understand he is fine with either pronoun unless he has changed his mind.

I really think it would be better if people relaxed. This is part of the psych community thing I was talking about. I do think we should always try to call people as they wish, that includes pronouns, terms, and their name, but also not get too freaked out if someone screws it up. I think most of us can tell when someone screws up innocently or does it on purpose to be disrespectful.

@Kraigmo That is part of the fringe I was referencing, and it is a problem for girls and women, but I figure if we go off on that tangent we will be misunderstood and get beaten up by the jelly mob. I’ll stifle myself there.

@Dutchess_III Women had to fight to be able to wear “men’s” clothing. We wanted it mostly because the clothing was safer, more practical, and more comfortable. Wearing a necktie I would say still moves into actually dressing in clothing very associated with men even to this day, but slacks, flat shoes, man tailored dress shirt style, all perfectly accepted now for women in most places thank goodness.

Hawaii_Jake's avatar

^People who are not LGBTQ but support us are called allies.

smudges's avatar

I watched a show called “We’re Here” recently and they said they wanted to be called drag queens or queens.

I think most of us can tell when someone screws up innocently or does it on purpose to be disrespectful.

Agreed.

JLeslie's avatar

We’re Here was in The Villages. I was actually invited to do Zumba for the show, but already had a party to go to. Several of my friends were there.

@Hawaii_Jake Ok, allies. Thank you. I’ll try to remember that. Where I live Rainbow Family is more the thing here, family and friends are always welcome and feel very included.

jonsblond's avatar

@JLeslie Ru Paul is gay, not transgender. When referring to a Drag Queen they prefer being called she while in costume because they are playing a female character. When they are just going about their lives while not in character they go by he. Drag is a performance art.

JLeslie's avatar

@jonsblond Ok, thanks. I heard that some people in the trans community were bothered that he was ok with he or she, and it seems to me he just isn’t upset by that sort of “mistake” unless he has changed on that topic now that it is more a thing. The average person doesn’t have all of that explained to them; that some people who dress in drag are trans and some are just performing. I realize it is not drag for people who are transgender. According to RuPaul’s sister in an interview I saw with her, he has been wearing dresses since he was a very young child. I am not sure that is a performance? Maybe? I have really liked Ru Paul for many years so that is the only reason I am dwelling on him. I don’t really follow the drag community nor very entrenched in it.

I just think expecting people to get it all correct just is a set up to feel anxious, hurt, and angry. I am not saying you expect it, I just mean people who do expect it. Obviously, if it is a family member or close friend who interacts with the person regularly, they should make an effort to call someone as they wish.

MrGrimm888's avatar

I had a neighbor we called “Hippy guy.” I never knew his real name.
Anyways, he was a hippie.
He had a beard, and wore glasses. He wore regular shirts, usually. But he often wore big dresses.

So. This was from that man’s mouth.
He claims “if it wasn’t for horses, we’d all be wearing dresses.”
I didn’t press him, on that comment, but he went on a rant about it.
He was also typically VERY drunk, or high on something.

But he wore long dresses, with big flowers on them, that would go down to his feet (yes, he wore sandals.)

It wasn’t a sexual thing, with him.

I also know a police officer, who was a regular man, then he transferred to a different city, and “became a woman.” (I don’t know about surgeries, but he dresses like a woman now with long hair and the whole nine.)

Cross dressing, IS an older term. It’s probably just as historically mean, but it doesn’t sound too bad. I’m guessing, it doesn’t fit modern times. I can’t say.

RedDeerGuy1's avatar

Also the term, ”,Tom boy” , should be erased.

janbb's avatar

Just to add my two-cents, I wouldn’t be highly offended or smack down anyone who used the term. I just think that what constitutes male or female dress is becoming as fluid as gender and eventually the term will not have much meaning.

JLeslie's avatar

Would a transgender person say gender is very fluid? I ask that seriously not to be dismissive. They feel so strongly they are the “other gender.”

jonsblond's avatar

^Gender-fluid fits under the transgender and nonbinary umbrella. All three are related.

MrGrimm888's avatar

I wish we ALL lived under one umbrella…
Maybe, one day…

Answer this question

Login

or

Join

to answer.

This question is in the General Section. Responses must be helpful and on-topic.

Your answer will be saved while you login or join.

Have a question? Ask Fluther!

What do you know more about?
or
Knowledge Networking @ Fluther