I’m finding myself falling into a deep depression and I don’t know what to do. Can you help?
Asked by
jonsblond (
44187)
1 week ago
from iPhone
I suffer from anxiety and depression and usually have it under control. I think my current depression is mostly situational.
I lost my job due to an injury and I was the one in the family with health insurance, so at this moment we are uninsured. I’ve been dealing with several health issues and now have to cancel appointments. I’m depressed about taking the job and leaving my old employer. I was miserable at my new job. I wish I had never left my previous employer.
We are in a moderate drought where I live. I’ve never seen so many warm, sunny days while living in Wisconsin. I love it here because we usually get weather! Clouds, rain, fog, mist. I miss it all so much. If I wanted to live in a desert climate I’d move back to Vegas. This dry weather has gotten me very depressed.
I live in a swing state so we are being bombarded by disgusting attack ads from the Republicans that are full of disinformation and fear mongering. October is my favorite month so I usually have scary movies or shows on the television. Every commercial is Trump or Hovde making false claims about the trans community. On top of this all I just learned that these attack ads are helping! People actually like the hateful speech coming from the Trump campaign.
I have so much negativity coming at me at once and I don’t know how to get out of it, and I can’t see my doctor for help.
Do you have any suggestions for me? Anything at all, even a suggestion for a light hearted movie would be appreciated.
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24 Answers
Thank you for doing the research!
Two Weeks Notice with Sandra Bullock and Hugh Grant always makes me laugh.
I’m very sorry you are going through this. Is there any way to get your old job back? I do know you have already thought of that. I’m just wanting to help and don’t know how. I’m hoping after the election things will quiet down, but we all know trump can’t shut up whether he wins or loses. Take care of yourself, first and foremost. Don’t forget to eat.
So sorry to hear this. No great advice at the moment but sending a hug.
It depends on how depressed you are, but if it’s enough to make daily functioning difficult: K. C. Davies has an audio book about getting through those very difficult times. It’s called “How to Keep House While Drowning”, and you can get it for free by doing a thirty day trial with Spotify or, for example, this website.
The title is misleading, it is not primarily about housework. Rather, it has practical ideas for surviving very difficult days by being kind to yourself.
Also, you are not alone. It can help to know that. Any chance there’s free group therapy in your area? Universities offer that sometimes, or there might be mental health organizations who can give you some info.
I’m sorry. It’s so difficult. For some lighthearted fun – when I was really depressed, the only show that would still sometimes make me laugh was the British version of Taskmaster. It’s very British, so not everybody’s cup of tea. Quite silly, but also smart. Nothing truly bad ever happens in the world of Taskmaster, everyone is only interested in games, riddles, and pranks.
I understand depression intimately. I’m sorry it’s dire for you right now. It just sucks bad. I’ve been there.
I watched Looney Tunes on YouTube. Those lifted me every single time.
Cooking helped. I would surround myself with cooking odors. Absolutely anything cooking is therapeutic. I love the smell of cinnamon, so something simple like oatmeal with cinnamon was good to smell.
I hope cold weather comes for you soon.
Thank you so much. All of you! <3
Oh – longgone just reminded me. The Great British Baking Show on Netflix got me through the pandemic and a new series is on now. Nothing really bad happens in the tent and the people are really nice to each other. There are several seasons you can watch.
At this point I’m ready to give up on Halloween and watch Christmas movies.
You’ve identified some of the things causing your anxiety and depression, I think do your best to avoid them. There is light at the end of the tunnel, the election is over Nov 5th, so the commercials will go away.
Can you record Halloween movies so you can fast forward the commercials? Or, borrow DVD’s from the library if you have a DVD player? What about a streaming service for 30 day free trial with no commercials?
I promise the weather will change and you will get some of the fall weather, and soon after it will turn into winter.
I can understand why the job thing has you down. My husband and I both have been through big disappointments and frustrations at times with jobs, careers, work, and it was really hard on us as individuals and as a couple. I wasn’t great at dealing with it.
It’s Christmas hire season, I think you can find a job at a retailer if you walk into several stores. It might wind up only being through the Christmas season, but sometimes it turns into a permanent job. If you don’t like it you can just leave in January saying you only expected to work for Christmas. It can be just part-time if you don’t want to work a lot, but it will put some cash in your pocket. Only negative is working Black Friday and some weekend days and probably Christmas Eve day.
Did you try going through the ACA marketplace for health insurance? Did you ask the doctors how much self pay is before you cancelled appointments?
If you think talking to a counselor will help pursue it, but if you have been through the routine before you probably can get through it without. You’re legitimately dealing with a lot of negative things at once right now.
^The good news is my husband found a new job the beginning of September. He’s the fabrication lead of a new start up company. It pays fairly well. Since it’s a small company they don’t offer insurance but they will reimburse us once we find something. We can get by with me finding part time work, plus part time gives me time to help my father.
@jonsblond That does sound good.
Open enrollment for ACA starts November 1st I think if you missed the window to get insurance when you left your job.
Also, you live in a place that is overall similar to your politics and supportive of your family. I’m assuming it still feels that way to you there. Does your youngest still live with you? Did he graduate already?
^Our youngest is still living with us. He’s almost 21 and working full time. He’s made a great supportive circle of friends here and is doing well. He’s saving money so he can move in with some friends next year. Thank you for asking. <3
^^That’s wonderful. Wow, time flies. I can’t believe he’s 21 now.
Maybe give yourself a mental break regarding the politics and the trans issues. Your son is doing well, an adult, and overall he is safe.
^Thank you. My son is safe but there are many who aren’t. You aren’t privy to the horror stories I hear from other parents. Many are not able to just up and move how my family did.
@jonsblond I don’t doubt it, but you can take a break from it sometimes and then go back to helping when you are feeling better. You’re important too.
@jonsblond Promise me you will call 608–265–4972 option 2. on Monday ?
@JLeslie I agree. I do need a break.
@Willie I will.
One of my favorite movies to treat depression is Ruthless People. Just mentioning it makes me want to watch it, in light of the news.
Aw, Sweetie, I get it. This election cycle is so fraught it has me practically under my couch. It’s like waiting for a diagnosis, with everybody yelling at you.
My quick go-to is silly videos. Dogs reviewing food. Huskies having loud tantrums (those make me laugh out loud). Quick bits by comedian Josh Johnson. Moo Deng biting someone’s knee.
These are targeted dopamine hits that lift the moment. They are not a substitute for a real fix, but they help.
Feel better, the barrage will stop soon.
Oh, and Pixar’s Ratatouille helps, too.
I’ve been through it myself. Medication can help some people. Ultimately, medication didn’t work for me, but I know there’s good data that it does for many people. If possible, try to get outside. Sunshine is helpful and if you have pets, they can be very therapeutic. Just taking a dog for a walk can help a lot. Wishing you the best.
I’ve been in a depression since about April, very deep at times. I don’t want to make this about me, but I can give you advice on what not to do.
Don’t tell yourself you’ll shower “tomorrow” – take one at least every 3 days. I won’t tell you how long I went without, but trust me, you’d be appalled.
Don’t just stay at home – I didn’t leave for 7 weeks and when I tried, my car battery was dead and there went $400.
Don’t watch/listen to commercials; as someone else said, ff through them.
Don’t avoid people – if you honestly can’t meet someone in person for coffee or whatever, try a phone call.
Don’t cancel therapy appts, GO to them, even if you look like crap. The therapist won’t judge you.
Here’s some sites I have saved in my favorites.
https://www.healthline.com/health/depression/top-iphone-android-apps
https://mind.help/moodtracker/
https://coloring-for-adults.com/all-coloring-pages
https://philome.la/jace_harr/you-feel-like-shit-an-interactive-self-care-guide/play/index.html This one is especially good. It guides you step by step with little thinking
https://www.getselfhelp.co.uk/emergency-or-soothe-box-first-aid-for-distress
https://www.thehealthy.com/mental-health/depression/depression-quotes/
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6w3rkIKSbjo (Copper the talking dog)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aV4zo01_8Bg (Billi the cat speaks)
Any baby elephant videos!
I feel for you, and just writing this post makes me feel a little more motivated to take care of myself. Thank you. See? You accomplished something without even trying! `♡´
I find it very therapeutic to mute commercials, especially My Pillow guy and the like.
First- my most recent therapist, who uses ChatGPT for other things has used ChatGPT to get feedback about her own dilemmas. If you have an affinity there, you might try it.
I was severely depressed (and frustrated about being depressed once again) over the past year. One thing that made a difference was ending a relationship that I had been unable to end. I’m not saying that’s the answer for you, but maybe think about something you’re holding onto that you need to drop. It might be deciding to drop a worry because it’s something you have no control over in your current situation.
I am sure some things shifted in my latest 9 months of therapy, but I think one of the most obvious benefits was someone was holding my hand while I was suffering the bullshit going on in my life. What might be a way to get your hand held?
If it’s safe, go for a walk at dawn or dusk when the weather is a little different. If you can’t walk, go outside and focus on the sounds.
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