General Question

bigbanana's avatar

To bathroom together or not to bathroom together, that is the question:?

Asked by bigbanana (494points) March 10th, 2009

So I was reading the tread (fyi not on the toilet)from the “fully love you” question earlier and someone mentioned “unabashedly farting” which gave me pause. Unabashadly huh? Then I remembered Woody Allen in Wild Man Blues, where in the hotels he and his daughter/wife and child stay in, he must always have his own bathroom. I remember thinking at the time that while it was truly in Woody’s neurotic nature, I also thought it was a good idea. I mean, why do couples have to share everything? Wouldnt that keep ones sex life alive a little longer if there was some mystery left? ie: “what does he do in there? what could possibly take so long? why does it smell so good when she comes out?” Ya know – the wonder of it all? Now I am all for self exposure (ahem – metaphorically) and being vulnerable with another human, but really do we have to share bathroom time?
Thoughts? Do you or Dont you with your partner? (not friends this is a SO relationship question)

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38 Answers

forestGeek's avatar

I have shared those moments with SOs and even a friend, but I definitely prefer not to. There are some things that we’re just best off not sharing!

gailcalled's avatar

When did “to bathroom” become a verb? I turn my back for one minute and look what happens?

marinelife's avatar

It has rarely been the expedient thing to do, and if needs must, I am willing, but as a general order of things—no way!

casheroo's avatar

I never go number two in front of DH! Never! I don’t think I could. I don’t like anyone being in the bathroom when I pee, that’s just from having a toddler attached to me 24/7, I make the bathroom “me time”.
But, alas, we don’t have a lock on our bathroom door, and it does not shut. So, there’s no real mystery in our home. I run water when I go to the bathroom, but that’s me being neurotic. I’ve gotten DH to do it, because I hate hearing poop plop. Yuck.

marinelife's avatar

@casheroo Me too. I have to ask husband to close bathroom door. He is heedless.

tinyfaery's avatar

I pee in front of my wife all of the time. Taking a poop however, is out if the question.

critter1982's avatar

Only pee never poo.

cdwccrn's avatar

I do what I have to do…..

chyna's avatar

@gailcalled gail <shakes head laughing>

syz's avatar

No! No, no, no!

Bluefreedom's avatar

I will not engage in any bowel movements in the presence of my wife and she will not download in my immediate vicinity either. We’ve seen each other urinate plenty of times but that’s different. I think.

jbfletcherfan's avatar

We have two bathrooms & we’ve just kind of staked out who goes to which one. But if circumstances warrant it, yeah we pee in front of each other. After being married for these many years, there’s no mystery left with us. But having a BM is different. The doors are shut & we respect each other’s privacy.

charliecompany34's avatar

my wife and i can watch each other shit and piss and still manage to keep the kids at bay—if they’re up. we can even exchange farts. once you are “one,” these personal things are secondary.

love IS grand.

babiturtle36's avatar

Never..I cant do #1 or #2 in front of him. He can do #1 in front of me just fine though, he wont even wait for me to leave the bathroom.

girlofscience's avatar

We both do 1 and 2 in front of each other. We do have two bathrooms, but sometimes my hair straightener will be already plugged into the bathroom he is 2ing in, and so I’ll straighten my hair while he 2s (as an example). No big deal.

tinyfaery's avatar

@gos It’s nice to know you have a natural and healthy attitude about bowel movements. =)

DrasticDreamer's avatar

Like a couple other people have already said, I’ll pee in front of him, but I won’t crap in front of him and he’s the same way. I think the only person who has been in the bathroom while I crapped was my mom. Knowing that she had to change my diapers just makes it a little easier. :D

bigbanana's avatar

@everyone I meant to write “thread” but I am sure you all got that.
@gailcalled, I ask you -why cant “to bathroom” be a verb? Try this on for size: “I’m off to bathroom” (it allows for the bathroomer, to excuse their self for a plethora of reasons, but not having to specifically designate which one).
or “I need to bathroom.” same idea, more flexibilty, possibly, dare I say, sexier than “I need to go take a xxx”
Just a thought and please know your grammar policing is appreciated.
Off to bathroom ;)

AstroChuck's avatar

Why not share this most intimate moment of all with your SO?

chyna's avatar

@AstroChuck that was too funny.

jbfletcherfan's avatar

@AstroChuck Ahhhh, what a hoot!

casheroo's avatar

@AstroChuck Lol.

Just to add on to my answer, I never go in front of my husband, but he leaves the door open sometimes when he goes, and I will poke fun at him with our son. We giggle at daddy on the potty. Fun times haha.

gailcalled's avatar

My ex was so anal-retentive that he couldn’t use the toilet without 1) shutting the door, and 2) turning on a radio or TV if I were in an adjoining room.

wundayatta's avatar

I generally follow the lead of whoever I happen to be living with at the time. Right now, we tend to be alone, but occasionally we have to be together, usually when we’re sitting, not standing (me being the only one who stands).

amanderveen's avatar

My SO and I don’t make a point of using the toilet with the other in the room, but we have been known to the odd time. Generally speaking, those occasions arise because we have one bathroom, are just pressed for time and neither of us it overly prudish around the other.

aprilsimnel's avatar

If water were an endless resource, I would totally want my own bath. The men I dated tended towards slobdom and I psychologically need the bathroom to be clean. If I get someone clean as an SO the next time round, that would be very nice.

rooeytoo's avatar

@AstroChuck – you always seem to come up with just the right video clip! How do you do it!

AstroChuck's avatar

Sheer talent.

bigbanana's avatar

I love that video, well in.

augustlan's avatar

My husband and I actually had this talk before we moved in together. Each of us had, in our prior marriages, gotten to the point that we could 1 or 2 in front of our spouses. We both agreed that we wished we hadn’t ever reached that point. We decided then and there not to do the same in our relationship. He has peed in my presence twice in 5 years (and both times I looked away), and I’ve never done so in front of him. I would if I had to, we just don’t want to make it a habit.

NaturalMineralWater's avatar

No sharing of toothbrushes. No company when doing #2. #1 is ok. xD

aprilsimnel's avatar

OH! Going to the bathroom together? No. No, no, no, no, no.

dynamicduo's avatar

I draw the line at deuces. Even tinkling is a bit uncomfortable, but that barrier has been going down in recent years. Sharing toothbrushes is right out, plus we like different firmness ones anyway.

It’s certainly not desirable, and I don’t walk into a bathroom that’s being used by my partner until he’s done.

Luckily my apartment has two bathrooms so these situations are avoided generally. I will never live in a place with one bathroom ever again.

Blondesjon's avatar

There is one bathroom in our house and five of us. Do the math.

TitsMcGhee's avatar

My last ex and I were perfectly comfortable, but I have yet to find anyone else (except my two best friends and my current roommate) who I am that at ease with. I mostly don’t have a problem with it; it’s mainly the other person who has the issue.

chyna's avatar

With my last ex, you didn’t want to go anywhere near it. And he went at least 5 times a day! Would actually wake up and go in the middle of the night. Is that normal?

echotech10's avatar

We both do #1 and #2 in front of one another. We have no inhibitions at all with that. When my wife and I first got together, she would only do #1 in front of me, until that pivotal moment in our relationship, when I did #2 in front of her, in her house (this was before we moved in together). After she saw me do #2 in front of her, she decided, that she can do both 1 and 2 in front of me. We have been married almost 5 years, and to this day, still proudly have the proverbial “open door policy”. For the record, we have more than one bathroom in our house. We also have a three year old daughter who is in the potty training process, so she follows both of us when either one is going either 1 or 2. We feel everyone pees and poops, no biggie. There is nothing wrong with that. Peeing and pooping are not things to be ashamed of to the point where we hide that part of life from our significant others. All my prior relationships prior to me getting married, my significant other and I did both 1 and 2 in front of one another at some point.

Nullo's avatar

@gailcalled I believe it’s a derivative of “to room together,” that is, to share a room.

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