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kayysamm's avatar

How can I tell my father I smoke?

Asked by kayysamm (435points) April 20th, 2009

He knows ive tried weed, but the thing is I smoke cigs too. It snot like I have one here and there type thing. I go throw a pack a half in two days. I hate hiding things from him because he is the only family I have left, but I don’t know how to tell him without killing his heart.

I have a cousin who smokes and everytime we are at a family party he cracks jokes because she goes out for a smoke, which is all fun and games. But when it’s me and him in the car he goes “I don’t know why she does that, she is killing herself. I hate when people do that. ” UGH :( i don’t want him to look at me for being a wrong child.

How can I tell him in the easiest yet simple way ?

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13 Answers

MrItty's avatar

You could simply quit. That way you’re neither lying to him nor killing yourself. Seems like the best of both worlds to me…

Myndecho's avatar

Tell him you have gotten pregnant, then say only joking I smoke.

Just to say he will still think you a “wrong child” as you put it, I just don’t understand why people smoke, I still believe it almost all with looking cool, just to say I would never date anyone what smoked.

MacBean's avatar

My nephew told my sister by letting her catch him.

discover's avatar

Its nice that you are concerned so much about your dad.

You can try nicotine replacement therapy (NRT), which can help you to quit gradually rather than suddenly. This will keep you healthy and your dad happy

check this article:

asmonet's avatar

If you’re smoking a pack and a half a day and you live with him, chances are he can smell it and he suspects. No one can hide that smell all the time. Either tell him because you want help quitting, or quit on your own and if you feel the need to tell later, you can. If you tell him with no intention to stop smoking, you’re only going to open both of you up to arguing and tension.

Bagardbilla's avatar

I’m with @asmonet on this…
He knows already, and cares and worries about you!
Probably just his way of letting you know he’s concerned.
You should try to quit, you’re young and beautiful & in less then a couple yrs your body should recover.

asmonet's avatar

@Bagardbilla: Actually it takes seventeen years for your lungs to recover. Quit now.

robmandu's avatar

My dad used to smoke in the house. We were used to it. Never noticed the smell.

I grew up, moved out, etc. And he quit, too.

Now, I can smell tobacco smoke lingering from far away and hours later. Designated smoking areas outside of buildings aren’t far enough away. I can smell the ashtray.

Point is, I agree with @asmonet. Even if you’re not living at home, unless your dad thinks you work at a nightclub or bar all the time, he very likely smells it on you. He’s giving you hints.

If you tell him you smoke, then you’re inviting his opinion and judgment. Are you sure you want that?

adreamofautumn's avatar

If you really care that much…as you appear to and well should, try quitting. My parents would have a fit if they new I smoked more than just a cig every now and then when i’m drunk so i’m working on ending that crap once and for all in my life. Maybe that is the direction you should go in, instead of needing to tell him the bad news, give him something good.

crisw's avatar

“i don’t want him to look at me for being a wrong child.”

Far better that than him looking at you hooked up to a respirator and and IV, your last breaths rattling in your chest as you gasp your life away with lung cancer.

Please quit, now, while you’re still young enough to heal the damage. I know you don’t want a lecture, and you may think you are young and immortal and impervious, but I’ve lost too many people I loved to horrible smoking-related deaths.

Dog's avatar

As a parent I can tell you that his comments in the car are intended toward you.

He knows you smoke.

He chooses to remain in perceived ignorance. If you tell him it means you are hopelessly addicted which is worse than what is in his mind- that you sneak a smoke now and then.

We all have secrets from our parents. I want you to think carefully:
Will telling him benefit you or him?
Will telling him bring him heartbreak?

Is it necessary to tell him and them make him feel obligated to “save” you?

kayysamm's avatar

yeah i know that he knows but i feel like it would be the right thing telling him.

—or at least i hope so—

Dog's avatar

To what end?

Will is make him feel good?
Will his life be improved in any way with your admission?

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