General Question

Facade's avatar

Why would someone think this way (see details)?

Asked by Facade (22884points) April 20th, 2009

Here’s a convo I just had…

Him: but u know what i’m not liking right now
Me : hm
Him: this whole maternal thing thats going on in these shows
Me: (rolling eyes)
Him: the random mommy/adoption thing is getting annoying
Me: get over it
Him: its making all the otherwise strong female counterparts of the shows look like sissies with swollen nipple-syndrome
Me: whoa
Him: sorry
Him: i just think that if you have a strong go-getter female character embracing woman empowerment, last thing you need to do is make her into a random ass mom all of a sudden
Me: smh
Him: am i out of line? seriously
Me: yea you are

How do you feel about this?

Observing members: 0 Composing members: 0

8 Answers

adreamofautumn's avatar

I actually think I may agree with him…based on the “last thing you need to do is make her into a random ass mom all of a sudden”. If that was in fact what happened in the show when suddenly the strong woman had a child that wasn’t anywhere to be found prior to that moment it smacks of “quick make sure the strong female role has a typically ‘feminine role’ too” to me. I hate when shows do that. Women can be strong and independent mothers and strong and independent women without being mothers. I hate when shows think that in order for the woman to play outside her “normal” gender role she also needs to fit into her “normal” role in some way.

Facade's avatar

so you feel like they’re forcing gender roles?
i never picked up on that

maybe they’re just following the normal cycle women go through..wanting to fulfill needs of motherhood

adreamofautumn's avatar

Could be either, I just don’t know if I believe it’s the “normal cycle” to want motherhood. I know plenty of women that aren’t moms and couldn’t be happier about it. They wanted their lives as they are and really have no desire to have children.
But yes, I read it as forcing gender roles.

Facade's avatar

I’m one of those women, but I always thought the majority wanted children.

tinyfaery's avatar

I agree with him. Just once I want to see a female character be completely satisfied with a life sans children. I want a character to not want children and not care if she marries. I want to see a woman satisfied in her career and getting her needs met without wanting more.

Count yourself lucky to have a man who views women as more than wife and mother.

asmonet's avatar

I agree with him. To be honest, I think you were the one out of line by telling him he was if anyone.

The assumption that women want children is ridiculous, and occasionally insulting.

I’m only 22 and I’ve been asked why I’m ‘not dating’ so I can find ‘the one’ and become a housewife, at least five times.

Maybe because I want a PhD before any of that, and I’m not even sure I want it?

adreamofautumn's avatar

@Facade don’t assume such things, one of the biggest obstacles with the “glass ceiling” is the idea that women that don’t want to stay at home and raise kids are somehow “abnormal”. We are not. No one is. Those who want to stay home and raise kids will, those who want to raise kids and work will and those who don’t want kids at all will live as they see fit. Only when people stop assuming that the “majority” of women want the same thing at any given time will things change.

veronasgirl's avatar

Actually I thought it was great that he didn’t just assume that all women want to settle down, have kids, and be a house wife. Granted, he could have chosen his words better, but still.

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