How do you fix a relationship where one or both members cheated?

For me, cheating is when you let communication in the relationship break down to the point where one or the other party wonders where the connection went. At this point, you are more loyal to something outside the couple (it could be yourself—in an isolated way) than you are to each other. No physical transgressions are necessary. Emotional transgressions are much more serious, as far as I’m concerned. It is only emotional transgressions that can open the door for physical ones.

You may have a different definition of cheating. (You’ll find other definitions here). Please talk about what you think goes wrong in relationships and how to fix it. I don’t mean “go to a counselor.” That’s pretty obvious. I mean what will you find out at the counselor’s office, and how can it be fixed?