Why is he so confusing?

My husband can be so mean and confusing. He is always saying to me “You cant do the dishes?” “You cant do the laundry” Why cant you do this, why cant you do that? He says these things when Im either in the middle of doing them or have finished them. Its like he does this to make me look lazy or something and it pisses me off. We will be talking about something and if it starts an argument- I have learned not to raise my voice to him because it just escalates- he tells me to stop yelling at him when Im not even talking loudly! I can be whispering to him and hes telling me not to yell! Another thing he does to me is if I ask him if we can go out or if someone invites us somewhere he says we can go.. then I get all dressed up and ready to go and right before were supposed to leave and gets pissed and says he doesnt want to go with me anymore and makes a big fuss over nothing. Then I get all upset and hes more pissed at me because now Im upset and it just doesnt make any sense to me. What is causing this behavior? I know I am not perfect but it just seems like he picks these fights with me over nothing.. how can I stop this or can someone please explain this behavior to me?