General Question

jca's avatar

Is my friend being nosy by looking at my Facebook wall to walls?

Asked by jca (36043points) May 27th, 2009

a friend of mine is also a “friend” on facebook, but she doesn’t use it – doesn’t comment, doesn’t post things on her wall, etc. She even said that she joined it but never uses it. However, the other day she mentioned a comment someone made on my wall. Is she being nosy by reading my wall to walls? I know i can restrict her but i didn’t think i would have to.

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26 Answers

Les's avatar

Maybe she was bored and just poking around, saw something that made her smile, and decided to participate in the frivolity.

Facebook is the ultimate “friends being nosey” tool. If you don’t want friends to know your stuff, don’t post anything on Facebook.

Master's avatar

No. If it’s in Facebook it’s for all the public to see and we (Facebook users) should be aware of the implications. If you don’t want someone to know or see something, don’t post it.

Also, I’m starting to believe social networks like Facebook are not for everyone. I don’t think just because everyone has it should be a reason to have one. There a great privacy implications (and other headaches) that come from social networking sites.

Lightlyseared's avatar

Isn’t that the point of facebook?

If you are not happy about people seeing your personal messages don’t post them on the front page of facebook.

La_chica_gomela's avatar

In my opinion, when you add someone as your facebook friend, you should expect them to read your “wall-to-walls” with other friends. And when you write on someone’s wall, you should expect it be read by all your friends and theirs. That’s just how facebook is set up. It shows them that stuff in their feed. If they log on, they’re going to see it, so if something is private, you should send it as a private message.

To make an analogy from high school, being upset about that is like writing a note on the outside of someone’s locker and then being upset that everyone who walked down that hallways saw it.

dynamicduo's avatar

Anything you choose to post publicly on Facebook is just that, public. If you didn’t want someone to read it, you should have made it a private conversation via the inbox. I do not consider it to be nosy to read other people’s face to faces.

Darwin's avatar

Nah. your friend isn’t nosy, just looking at what you put up for people to look at. If you don’t want people to know something then don’t put it on your wall.

Ivan's avatar

If you don’t want your comments to be public, make them private.

aidje's avatar

Any private conversation should happen via private message, not on public walls.

Bobbydavid's avatar

Pathetic to even consider writing what I think of that question!

TheWeedMan's avatar

Not at all. If you post shit on ther internet you can not complain that it is read. You dont like the rules? Dont have a faceboook…

Careful my flutherite… Careful

jessicar's avatar

This is exactly y i dont like facebook, theres absoltely no privacy on that site. Everything u do it tells all. I stick to myspace.

MrItty's avatar

The “walls” are intended for public viewing. That’s why they’re there. Your friend is doing absolutely nothing wrong. You may as well get pissy at her for not plugging her ears as you and your friend have a conversation out loud in the same room.

If you want a private conversation, you send a private message, not a wall posting.

MrItty's avatar

@jessicar that is both false and a gross oversimplification. There is absolutely privacy on facebook. You just have to choose to use it.

robmandu's avatar

@jessicar, BUWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH… “stick to myspace” for privacy.

Oh man, that’s good.

Facade's avatar

Facebook is a public place where people are free to be nosy. Chat elsewhere if you don’t want your conversations read.

3or4monsters's avatar

You can send private messages in facebook. You can filter who sees what on your facebook. You can chose what you say on facebook.

Also, anything you type shows up on your friends “feeds” (all they do is click the “home” button on their facebook page). That means that through no effort, digging, searching, or snooping on their behalf, WHAT YOU DO (and what all their other friends do) is arranged chronologically for them to read. All they have to do is LOG IN and it pops up, conveniently, for them to read, because that’s THE POINT.

Learn how to use facebook, please.

Judi's avatar

Thats why they call it a WALL not a letter or a note.

Jeruba's avatar

There is no such thing as “nosy” in that environment. You have opened your life to the world. Think of the fascinated thousands, perhaps even millions, who have viewed your personal pages online and not told you about it.

When you open your personal space to public view, try thinking not about a huge faceless audience or a little circle of best friends but about that one person—any one person—that you wouldn’t even tell your dog’s name to. Are you sure you want to post?

justwannaknow's avatar

If it is up there for the “world” to see, then what is the problem if a friend sees it?

jca's avatar

Thank you all for the opinions. All are appreciated, although there was a little bit of rudeness that wasn’t.

TheNimrod's avatar

I don’t know if they still have it on there but for a while I remember that if you were friends with both people, it would say “this person has written on this persons wall!” and then it would show part of it. but then again i could be crazy.

jessicar's avatar

@MrItty & @robmandu…dang thought i could give an opinion without bein attacked…wow.

TheNimrod's avatar

@jessicar the only thing is that you gave a statement and not an opinion. Facebook can be really private like myspace, you just have to know how to do it. writing on someone’s wall is pretty much the exact same as leaving a comment on myspace. and if it’s something private you send them a message.

shrubbery's avatar

It’s probably not your friends fault that now everything anyone posts pops up on everyones homepage. she probably just logged in for the first time in ages and voila, there was the comment on your homepage. so I wouldn’t worry. I do it to my friends sometimes when I see things on the homepage. I’m all like “hey, I’m not facebook stalking you or anything but it was on the homepage… blah blah blah”

MrItty's avatar

@jessicar I did not attack you. I told you that you oversimplified, and that your oversimplification was factually incorrect. If you said 2 + 2 = 5 and I told you that it actually equals 4, that would also not be an attack.

tiffyandthewall's avatar

i think the main attraction of facebook is that it’s like snoopcentral. sure, you friend is definitely being nosy. but that’s the whole point! haha.

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